No amount of romanticizing the past will change the fact you are getting old.
The uncool old people complaining about the new generation that you used to roll your eyes at are now you.
The 1990s (or the 90s) is a decade that took place from 1991 to 2004 and is currently being bent over and raped with nostalgia by crazy 16-year-old girls and retrofags as if it happened at least 100 years ago.
Key events that took place in the '90s:
- Kurt Cobain becoming an Guitar Hero.
- George Bush Sr. and Bill Clinton took over the world.
- The internets became really popular.
- Computers became usable for idiots and AOL was popularized, which caused many faggots to fuck up the internet.
- Macs became marginally affordable, enabling more Jobs-loving faggots to ruin the internet EVEN MORE!
- AIDS was upgraded to v2.6.
- Doom came out, causing extreme butthurt among the reasonable Conservatives infesting the United States who cried like little girls over the extreme violence found in the game (at least for the time), calling it a satanic game, even though you kill over 9000 demonic minions of Satan throughout the game.
- Video games and cartoons were still enjoyable.
- The release of the PlayStation and Nintendo 64
- Timothy McVeigh becomes the all-time high score of the century.
- Some people in the ass-end of Europe got butthurt over religion, starting a war that killed a bunch of idiot Slavs.
- Jesse Spano became addicted to caffeine because there was never enough time.
- Baruch Goldstein goes for the High Score and frags 29 Palestinians.
- Lulz were invented.
- Mad Cow disease, better known as PMS, rocks the world
- A series of School Shootings plagued the USA in the second half of the decade, but not to the extent that Columbine eventually did.
- Black People in L.A. rioted, creating the inspiration for The Great Habbo Raid of July 2006.
- Matthew Shepard is stuck on a fence in Wyoming in an act of extreme gaycism.
- At least 100 Jews began to plot the WTC attacks.
- Boybands broke onto the music scene, invaded our TV stations and radio waves and steadily spouted ear-raping songs to the world. Groups such as 'N Sync and The Backstreet Boys crawled out from under their dark rock of fail into stardom; this resulted in years of faggotry and a fanbase of 16 year old girls. Their sordid careers were eventually murdered by 9/11 and 4chan. Unfortunately, their aura of gayness managed to take many virgins with them on their way to hell.
- Everyone who posts on /b/ nowadays, was born during this decade.
- Doopie DoOver, internet famous (in his own mind) Thai Lady/Boy, Anime tracer and A con artist specialising in autistic man-children is born to an unwed mother in the Dade County/Miami Jail.
- Aeris Dies, causing most Playstation gamers playing Final Fantasy 7, to BAWWW for years to come.
- Glenn Beck allegedly raped and murdered a young girl.
- Osaka first appeared, bringing verbal mindfucks to us all. Seriously, what IS it called when a cat paddles?
- Duke Nukem Forever wasn't made.
- Bill Clinton did not have sexual relations with that woman, Monica Lewinsky. The allegations leading to his impeachment were false.
- Marilyn Manson trolled Christfags and Republicans everywhere.
- Columbine escalating the fear of school violence, and creating a new generation of copycats and wannabes.
Circa 2008, a movement to reminisce on the decade started. Originally intended to be a simple lookback on the 90s, it eventually became a large militant fanboy army movement that overtime began to rape the decade like they were 90-year-olds talking about the 1920s. Members of the army are called "90s kids".
The large pride movement propagates the view that the 90s:
- were all about happy childhood and music, and nothing more
- had absolutely no war or sadness and that everyone was walking around like a happy Disney movie
- THE BEST DECADE EVAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There is an ongoing civil war on teh internets about who can be called a "90s kid". 16-year-old girls claim to know every single last detail about the entire decade because they know about boybands and the Macarena, though they only remember the last few years. On the other side, a group of grown pedos hold the view that you HAVE to be born in the 1980s to even know anything about the view. However, both flaunt their childhoods like they were on a float in some flashy gay pride parade.
The movement bashes the 2000s, holding the view that it was like the Holocaust, World War I and World War II happened 24/7 throughout the decade, that everyone was an evil pedophile, that kids are brainwashed spoiled brats and that everything is commercialized (although 90s kids were obliviously fed commercialism as a child). Originally, the movement bashed anything that was created past December 31, 1999, but the bashing has since been lifted and currently bashes anything post-2006.
The 1980s nostalgia movement, a predecessor of the 1990s nostalgia movement, occasionally sends fanboy troops called "80s kids" into their holy altar of worship known as "tribute videos", in an effort to bash the decade, but they are instantly surrounded and lynched by other "90s kids". However, when a tribute to the 2000s is made, both 80s and 90s kids team up to vandalize and sacrilege the altar, and proceed to lynch the "00s kids", people born between 1993–2002 who have given up trying to act like they experienced much, if any, of the 1990s.