Alexandre Bissonnette

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To those fleeing persecution, terror & war, Canadians will welcome you, regardless of your faith. Diversity is our strength #WelcomeToCanada


Archive today-ico.png Justin Trudeau

Alexandre Bissonnette
Born 1989
Nationality: Canuck MiniflagCanada.png
Occupation Chess Grandmaster
Highscore Killed 6, injured 19
Style FPS, Singleplayer
Top 50? lolno (85th notable loser)
An Hero? No. Turned himself to the police
and said, "Sorry, eh."

Celebrating Canada's cultural diversity, a hero of the white race named Alexandre Bissonnette (alias: Heinrich Potter) entered the Islamic Cultural Centre of Quebec City, performed wuḍūʾ (الوضوء), and shot up the sandniggers. Since he killed his enemies, they won.

The shooting[edit]

Harry Potter Mass Shooter NAZI.png

At around 8pm on the 29th of January 2017, Alex entered Le Mosque's ground floor, where all the men where gathered. The women and children were segregated to the upstairs, probably cooking or birthing.
Alex shouted his best

Allahu akbar


They started to fire, and as they shot they yelled, 'Allahu akbar!' The bullets hit people that were praying. People who were praying lost their lives. A bullet passed right over my head


—Witness to the religion of peace

Members Of The Mosque[edit]

  • Mohammed Oudghiri who has lived in Quebec for 42 years is "very worried" and thinking of moving back to Morocco.
Security status : The UK Foreign and Commonwealth Office advise citizens in Egypt to Exercise a High Degree of Caution.

Holidaymakers travelling to the Red Sea coastal resorts of Sharm El Sheikh are advised to avoid travelling outside of these resorts.


Archive today-ico.png Great thinking

Pig's Head[edit]

What is the most serious: a pig’s head or an invasion of terrorists?

Some time during 2015 a pig's head was left for the mudslimes during Ramadan, so the poor souls would not starve. It was a kind gift, but the ungrateful fucks declined it. Alongside the thoughtful gift a well-meaning and insightful leaflet was left for curious readers. It was entitled "What is the most serious: a pig’s head or a genocide".

Quebec Mosque Gift Wrapped.jpg

Quebec Mosque Pig's Head.jpg

Looks absolutely delicious.

Daily Beast Reporting[edit]

If you needed even more reason to disregard Daily Beast as a legit news source, you have to look no further than their coverage of this. They were fooled by the Archive today-ico.png fakest of fake twitter accounts, and actually believed that Davis Aurini and Matt Forney were behind the shooting.

Quebec Mosque Shooting Daily Beast Coverage.jpg
Archive today-ico.png Seems legit.

High Score[edit]

Graded Score
Kill count: 6/20 (19 Injured)
Accuracy: 5/20 20% killrate, horrible
Style: 5/20 Canadian rip-off
Butthurt: 17/20 Canada levels of butthurt
Bonus: 20/20 Less Muslims on Earth
Total Score: 53/100 (F-)
BUILD THAT WALL [to the north]!!
See full ranking

Wanted Level

Police Force

See Also[edit]

Tumblricon.png His Tumblr

External Links[edit]

Alexandre Bissonnette
is part of a series on
Soviet Canuckistan
Fuck it's cold, eh?

Alek MinassianAlexandre BissonnetteAmanda ToddAniMatAvril LavigneBrandon CrispCheddar-CheesiaChris ForcandCocaine BabeColin MochrieChuggoDorian_GayDouglas SpinkEvalionFergie OlverJames CameronJasonafexJawsusJdsonicJohn KricfalusiJustin BieberJustin TrudeauKimveer GillLuka MagnottaMarc LepineMatthew de GroodMelina RobergeLosttrapRob FordRyan HaweSharlene SimonWilliam Shatner



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Civilization and Great Prophets

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Banned From Scoring

Asa CoonBilly MitchellBrian Isaack ClydeJohn EarnestLogan ClarkNasim AghdamSam HydeSol PaisTodd RogersWilliam Atchison

Featured article February 2 & 3, 2017
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