Stephanie Michelle Brown, a.k.a. "BrOwNiE" (1989-2007), was a 17 year old girl from Wyandotte, Michigan who was the first female to become an hero by overdosing on heroin. She gained web notoriety when her friends posted numerous, nauseatingly shitty MySpace memorial profiles and subsequently gave birth to a new meme, "An Heroine".
How the bitch died
Last Thursday, An Heroine lied about her age to dance as a stripper, got drunk and went lesbian with a fellow whore by the name of Jamie Lynn Adkins of Lincoln Park, who can be seen here. Then, they both got high off cocaine, ecstasy and blunts (combined street value: over 9000), fucked two nigras (one of whom is totally going to jail for this shit) then finally ODed whilst finishing off the cocaine. This is all fact. Kids these days just can't handle their coke. Annoyingly, this means she didn't actually die from ODing on heroin as first believed. However, her actual death is far more LULZy, so fuck it.
The MySpace profile was originally posted on 420chan, where it didn't receive much attention until Anonymous brought it to 4chan's /b/. The result was a hellstorm of instant lulz which quickly brought a raid on her MySpace blogs, as well as attacks upon the majority of her friends who had memorial profiles.
Contrary to popular belief, her nickname "Brownie" did not come from her last name, but instead her love of brown tar heroin. When not broken up into a powder, this variety of heroin resembles a hearty chocolate brownie. It is reported that (actual) brownies were also one of her favorite foods, which she would throw up while riding the brown dragon.
In one of her nonsensical blog entries, she outwardly denies responsibility for her lying, scheming, drug-fueled, whorish actions, and then proclaims that she is clean and sober:
- "Fuck man, im never gunna live this shit down am I?
- Do a little drugs,
- Fuck a few guys,
- And everything you say is a lie,
- Youre a stupid drugged up bitch who doesnt know anything.
- WELL WORLD I AM FUCKING CLEAN NOW AND HAVE BEEN FOR A VERY LONG TIME SO SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GET OVER ME, I AM SO OVER YOU!
- xoxo <3 Stephanie"
In retaliation to the blog raids, a number of Stephanie's friends came back screaming to high hell about how wrong and bad everyone was. Most of the messages consisted of angry ranting tripe by people who were pissed that they couldn't fuck their dope slut anymore. Anonymous replied in kind, stating the truth that her own friends were the ones who had killed her through their ignorance and indifference in regard to her obvious cries for help. Of course, nobody really cared about the junkie whore to start with, but it's still their fault.
One of her friends, "Sofonda," found her way to the /b/ post and started demanding that everyone show their face. Of course this was met with only more shoops, and hilarity ensued. Soon after, it was uncovered that Sofonda was the person who had sold her the heroin that she ODed on, and the reason she was attempting to piss in the ocean of piss was because of her own guilt.
Some have speculated that the reason why she overdosed wasn't related to her wanton lust for unprotected sex, but because of the low quality of the lunch menu at her school, where she couldn't get a decent meal.
Her friends Bitches don't know she became an hero
They still talk to the bitch like she's alive.
Random comment from her MySpace page:
The whore is in hell. There is no possible way that she could make a song skip while being raped by demons' spiky cocks. Secondly, a song skipping is hardly a sign. This goes to show how stupid her friends are, which in turn shows how stupid she was. The world is better off.
Another idiot friend, who happens to be a bisexual fat bitch, has a MySpace page that she uses to send hatemail as she didn't get to bang Brownie before she died.
In retaliation to the appearance of new Brownie MySpaces, a dickless assbag who still defends his stripping, coke-snorting drug addict of a prostituting rotting corpse that was his junkie girlfriend has appeared, sending unparagraphed hate-PMs to EDiots and /b/tards on MySpace. Strangely, he seems to be okay with the fact that she was double-stuffed raw in the ass by two big black person dudes while a chick fisted her mouth on the night she died. He says he will hunt us down and kill all of us. Epic lulz from an internets tard who has an amazingly big red nose.
In case anyone would like to write to her grieving boyfriend (for the lulz of course), he would love to hear about what you think of the matter at this private MySpace account, or at this not-so private MySpace (which also sends pro-Brownie propaganda). Might not be the same guy, but he's probably just as pissed that he didn't get to nail her before she kicked the bucket as the other.
Too bad his brain isn't as large as his nose, otherwise he might not have made the mistake of posting his telephone number on the internets:
The attention whore is obviously just looking for new friends. Life must be tough when Jew
During the commencements that she couldn't wait long enough to go to, her brother had to accept her diploma. That's right. Dead people can graduate too. They also changed the class motto from Hakuna Matata to Live and Let Live (moar liek Live and Let Die, amirite)?
Brownie's death was copied from chapter 25 of My Immortal, in which Draco took out a heroin cabaret and spiked it, giving it to Ebony to spork.
Conviction of the Drug Dealer
Deleon Alexander II from Lincoln Park, who gave the slut her drugs and butt fucked her, was sentenced on October 24th. His lawyer said, "The defense has said Alexander never intended for anyone to die and claimed Brown requested and ingested the drugs herself." This man must have been sent by God.
Other 'An Heroines'
- Amanda Todd
- Christine Chubbuck
- Emma Jones
- Gabrielle Molina
- Hannah Bond
- Jenny Grant
- Megan Meier
- Phoebe Prince
- Rachele Rudd
- Sadie Davila
- Her original MySpace Page (All that HTML in her MySpace will fuck up your computer, making it necessary to reboot)
- Boyfriend's Private MySpace
- Not-so Private MySpace from the Boyfriend
- A friend of Brownie's who hates the LULZ
- Newspaper report on her death
*The dude is set to be raped for life The link is dead... Just like the protagonist for this article. OH LAWDY...
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|Featured article April 14, 2007|
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