Anton Lundin Pettersson
|Anton Lundin Pettersson|
|Born||June 22, 1994|
|Highscore||Killed 3, injured 1|
|Style||Single player Hack'N'Slash|
|An Hero?||Killed by police|
On October 22, 2015, young Padawan Apprentice Killeen' Arabs-Solo卐 (Powerword: Anton Niclas Lundin Pettersson) decided to perform community service by lowering the amount of undesirables at the Kronan Jedi Training School in Sweden. Upon entering the school, he took a selfie with some other trainees, and then, displeased with how his picture turned out, swore upon Anakin Skywalker to avenge himself, donned a Sith mask, and proceeded to march through the corridors and eviscerate anyone that smelled like a camel with his fucking lightsaber sword.
A New Hope
Anton was a completely well-adjusted individual from a degenerate arctic wasteland of sodomites. He targeted Kronan School because it was filled with immigrants, and he wanted to save everyone from self-righteous preaching at the hands of savages who wanted the new Star Wars movie to have a diversified cast.
Equipped with a knife, sword, and knock-off Darth Vader mask, plus a heart full of unimaginable courage, he approached the school and faced his destiny. Shortly after arriving at the school, he took a photo with some bright-faced Jedi students and posted it to his Facebook to increase his Edgelord points.
As time ticked by and his post generated no likes, he became extremely hurt and decided to talk to someone about his feelings. As he raced down the hallways, searching for people with brown skin, he spoke aloud from the Holy Scripture, reciting, "I AM YOUR FATHER. I AM YOUR FATHER. I AM YOUR FATHER."
Ahmed Hassan, 15, was also stabbed and died later of his wounds. He was sitting in a class when the killer came to the door, and said, "Knock knock." Hassan reportedly opened the door before saying the customary "Who's there?" and subsequently was cut down for his insolence.
Anton was described by a local man as quiet and reclusive. He liked heavy metal music and hated hip-hop. On his Facebook and YouTube pages he liked and shared movies that glorified a perfectly healthy interest for any young man, which is the reason his motive for playing IRL Fruit Ninja is considered to be racially-driven.
Darth Anton finally got shot by police and died hours later at hospital. One person was quoted as being mildly disturbed, everyone else just shrugged and said, "Well, at least they weren't white children". Politicians used his failure to kill more than two people as justification for their current laws on gun control.
|Kill count:||3/20 You'd expect a sword against unarmed victims to yield better results.|
|Accuracy:||10/20 Managed to impale 3 sandniggers with his Knight's weapon.|
|Style:||20/20 The first Star Wars-themed murder spree, homage to the classics.|
|Butthurt:||15/20 Muh immigrants.|
|Bonus:||20/20 Melee bonus, took a selfie with bystanders in the middle of killing.|
|Total Score: 68/100 (D+)|
See full ranking
- Anders Behring Breivik - Luke Skywalker's Norwegian descendant.
- Brenton Tarrant - Aussie Jedi who used blaster instead of lightsaber to dispatch kebabs.
- Dmitry Vinogradov
- Mr. Saari
- Pekka-Eric Auvinen
|Featured article October 25 & 26, 2015|
| Preceded by
David "Walky" Willis
|Anton Lundin Pettersson|| Succeeded by|