- Web IRC
Veteran EDiots can point to countless retards who use the Internet - indeed, documenting them is the primary purpose of this site (secondary purposes include porn and mockery). With such a robust body of work, there naturally occurs a hierarchy: A distinction between your common, run-of-the-mill dumbass, and truly revolting degenerates that parody the human race; the Gold, Silver, and Bronze medalists in the Asshole Olympics. Their departure would greatly benefit mankind, no matter how severe their condition, especially so if they are niggers. Every day, God ignores our pleas to smite them, deciding instead to provide us with entertainment while we wait for Jesus to respawn and tell us how to shot web.
Arceusfan2013 (Raymond Allen Francis) is certainly no Gold medalist (the jury's still out on whether or not he's a nigger)... but the reason we have other medals is to offer encouragement to runners-up, so that they might open up and reveal their true colors. And recognition just so happens to be the object of Raymond's sexual desires!
Like so many other candidates for an ED article, Raymond was discovered wandering around outside of his assigned area - a chance encounter with an ordinary, well-adjusted citizen of the tubes. In the comments section of this JewTube video, Ray (as Guiyii2) immediately endeared himself to an audience of stunned onlookers by DEMANDING that the video's author, a computer musician, create theme songs for his Pokemon/Dynasty Warriors crossover fanfic characters. And if that last sentence didn't establish Ray as being a card-carrying sperg, his unique mannerisms sure did. The ensuing conversation saw the artist gently refusing to cooperate, followed by Ray insisting that Arceus2013 was a totally different guy and that he'd go crazy without this free music; as a supplement to that, the artist should feel honored for having been given the opportunity to do free work for the "God Of Gaming."
At that point, it was evident to all involved that the boisterous interloper was profoundly autistic, as nobody in their right mind would say any of that, starting with the bit about the Pokemans. But the rabbit hole deepened with each successive post. Continuing the "I'm not me, I'm him" charade, he ups the ante with the enticing prospect of Arceusfan2013's friendship on Wikia. Unmoved, the artist again refuses, forcing Ray to flap his arm-stumps in violent protest - nobody but Ray is sure what he meant to type, but what the keyboard registered was, I shit you not, "JUST FUCKING DO IT OR I SWEAR TO GOD THAT YOu'LL NEVER SEE YOUTUBE AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!"
That kind of outburst would normally end in a backhand from his tard wrangler and the forfeiture of his Teddy Grahams, and for those of you wondering why that didn't happen, Ray goes on to explain the financial situation in his household; namely, that Google, Microsoft, and Sony are stealing all the monies. That is why his family can't afford to pay someone for adult supervision services, but more to the point, since those companies are going to end up with all the money anyway, the artist should just deal with the fact that he's about to do work for free. From his perspective, I'm sure all his parents' money does end up in the pockets of video game publishers - pacifying this retarded fuck with vidya is surely less painful than rehabilitating him.
His last, desperate act was to utter his most bizarre threat yet:
What has Science done?
Where Raymond's antics provided the curiosity, the fact that he mentioned Wikia conveniently provided the crumb trails. Wikia is renowned for being a somewhat more Web 2.0 Proboards solution, frequented chiefly by Junior High kids fresh out of Computer Science III whose interests are limited to their ORIGINAL RECOLORS DO NOT STEAL and leveraging the limp power of a fringe fandom Wikia bureaucrat to propel their inane, contrived fantasies into the limelight. That none of them have succeeded in this is somewhat more surprising than the following fact: The consensus among these retards, is that Raymond is a retard.
Turns out he's got a rap sheet, ironically in the form of an attack article. Dated 2010, it appears that Raymond's operating procedure was to awkwardly irritate the piss out of forum administrators in an attempt to befriend them. This is done in preparation for phase two, which is to flex muscles he doesn't have during his inevitable conflicts with other members, promising that his friends in high places will ban them. To the surprise of nobody but Raymond, this backfires, sometimes because the moderator whose apron he tugged was unwilling to overturn the decisions of another moderator. Of course, his reaction was to register a new account, which is a frontier security circumvention strategy years ahead of its time... and it would have worked, too, if all of his usernames didn't conspicuously include the word "Raymond."
Immediately following his unqualified failure at subverting a fandom Wikia to his dopey will, he decided to give his plan another shot, this time at a Playstation Trophies forum. The staff there is apparently either a testament to superhuman patience, or remarkably tolerant of autistics, as demonstrated by the public, unprotected records of messages between Ray and the moderators who he intended to butter up. Even more mind-blowing is that they locked over 50% of his threads, including one where he asks the million-dollar question, "Who is Anonymous?" The messages paint the silhouette of several instances of forum misconduct, from multiple subsequent threads on the same topic to bitch fights with other users... but the real treats are the times he invokes mod wrath to no effect, demands that everyone kowtow to him on his 15th birthday, and hilariously, the time he complained that his parents' PSN Parental Controls were so draconic that he couldn't play Little Big Planet or ModNation Racers, international staples of the autistic diet.
His coup de grace, however, was absolutely the time he threatened to summon Guiyii2, 210-year-old resident of YouTube, to shoot everybody on the forum.
Return to (an entirely different) Wikia
There were three years between his 2011 fallout with that PlayStation forum and the 2014 eruption on YouTube. He appears to have spent most of it at a Wikia that I wish I could describe to you, but I have no fucking idea what it is. If you think you can figure it out, be my guest. Near as I can tell, he nestled in with some other short bus jockeys and tried to play no-rules Dungeons and Dragons using maps of Earth, except it's not clear that anybody involved is even playing the same game. It is an indecipherable orgy of asses and burgers and neon MSPaint horseshit, but just like his contributions to the forum, each one of his blog posts (linked above) is equal parts expository and depressing.
Naturally, even amongst his own kind, he is universally reviled and unwelcome. He was the center of several convoluted and limp-dicked slap fights, which bled over onto his Newgrounds account when he decided to resurrect it from a two-year hiatus. Attentive readers will have seen this coming - he did so for the express purpose of soliciting the Newgrounds community's services as a personal army. It worked exactly as well as it did the last two times. He was banned, and though his userpage was "vandalized," the page's history reveals his fruity delusions about being a time traveler, including more paranoia about Google, as well as sickeningly homoerotic status blocks describing, mathematically, his relationships with the wiki's other users.
In his downtime from that community, he posts insightful content suggestions on the Minecraft forums. They are universally panned.
He is so totally going to blank this page. And if all of the above is any indication, he's likely already flooded YouTube support staff with tickets demanding moderator powers and birthday cards. The only way this can end well is if word of his shenanigans reaches his parents, and they smother him with a pillow out of embarrassment.
The only thing that exceeds Raymond's potential for fail is the sheer number of his usernames, a byproduct of how often he's had to evade bans by registering new accounts. Now, typical of retards, his various About Me pages explicitly dictate his aliases, but even a total idiot could make the connections because they all have subtle similarities that a keen Internet detective might notice. TEST YOUR MIGHT: lightningraymond, RAYMOND1996, RAYMOND19962, RAYMOND1996EX... I wouldn't be surprised if the password to every one of his accounts is "RAYMOND." So with all these clues, as long as you have fewer chromosomes than him, you can spot him in a crowd.
- LBP profile, filled with hate mail from other players
- Playstation Trophies forum profile, a precious goldmine of lulz
- unused forum account
- one of his personal forums, he's started a lot of these over the years, but most of them are dead links now; he was the only user anyway
- his Newgrounds profile
Arceusfan2013 is part of a series on YouTube.
|Arceusfan2013 is part of a series on Aspies.||[Sperg out]|