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Argent009

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Lulz agent.jpg

Argent009, also known as "RollerPig" or The Mole, and now re-registered as Argentium009, is a 43-year-old gay cripple on disability who mooches off his senior-citizen partner, Roy, for rent and food. Slightly off his rocker, he spends his days on the internet trying to get hired by Steve Chen at YouTube and The Vice President of Content at livevideo [1], and has a penchant for class action lawlsuits and is apparently involved with the International Web Police, [2], thus diagnosing him with a srs case of victim complex. He, like many other failfags believed he would take down ED...as always lulz ensued, along with epic fail.

He also bares a stunning resemblance to Cyndre, has a lump-crease of fat on his forehead, and has been trolled by bantown. In what could not have been better timing, Argent009 experienced profound butthurt (possibly Ray ran out of lube) and quit YouTube forever. And he really means it this time. As part of his retreat to the hugbox of The Promised Land, Argent009 ceded all of YouTube to the authority of Bantown and its designated representatives.

More recently, Argent had a heart attack and has been listed in critical condition.

Coup on YouTube

Argent is serious business.

All the while during the PeppermintPatti drama, Argent was going on a pseudo-campaign to gain control and leadership over the Youtube Street Team, after an email received from a top rep at YouTube. He was later found too annoying and unstable to fit the position, and is now moar e-humble. The following is a copypasta of a poorly written, cryptic, e-mail user wattage received in his mailbox. All of the following is verbatim.

Argent009 is already dancing upon command, he is pretending to post his Steve Chen emails as a response to one of Renetto's videos, when all he is really trying to do is stop Steve Chen from backing out off employing him.
Argent009 is only PRETENDING to be the General of the coalition to stop the haters. No one actually follows him. If he gets any power he will only put his few friends on the Street Team, no one else would work with him.

The Battle of Argent009

YouTube Favicon.png Argent009/YouTube

When Argent009 heard of the trolling 
done by wattagecat and ED, 
he reacted with an eerie, dark video 
with death metal in the background.  
He was a force to be reckoned with.  
He attempts to represent democracy 
yet at the same time desires that youtube 
be turned into a police state.  
Not to mention the death threats, deletion 
of videos, and annoying the shit out of Steve Chen.

Declaration of war


   
 
tl;dw: They're an organized group of serious troublemakers, and I intend to bring this to the attention of the FBI.
 

 
 

Argent009 - because everyone knows the IRL government will save us

Argent will save u from "evil-doers"

Final Warning

How to view the lulz.

You can view the final warning hereBALEETED! in the Argent009 folder, the video is named "Final Warning". For some odd reason Argent009 seems to believe Google and YouTube will come after ED. He does not explain why he believes that laughing at a fat guy is a criminal offense. Google and YouTube have so far refused to defend Argent009's right not to be laughed at.

YourTubeCommunity

A lot of his shit is based around his crappy Joomla website. Nobody gives a shit


   
 
LOL! "MediaWiki"?
 

 
 

Argent009

His fantasy

Argent009 dreams of, and masturbates violently to, the very notion of having moderation abilities (see also: sysops/ops/moderator/forumwhore shits) or other assorted powers at YouTube. He is constantly degrading himself in vain efforts for support from his subscribers in an attempt to lead them all, though to what terrible ends he would lead them to, no one is sure. The plan seems to involve the nefarious YouTube Street Team, which may or may not exist and may or not be planning a group suicide ritual in Guyana. There's just no way of knowing!

It is not unlike the avert-your-eyes brown-nosing Shadow42 and Slowking_man give on freenode in their attempts to gain respect and eventual Jewhood.

Seeking wealth

Class Action Lawsuit, zomg.

Argent009 has a reputation for trying to form a class action lawsuit against various organizations, it's pretty obvious that he's just in it for the money, liek mediacrat, amirite?


Dear Feature Price Victim,

You are receiving this E-Mail because you signed up to participate in a class action lawsuit against Feature Price (featureprice.com) via our web site located at http://www.featureprice-review.com. You placed your name in our database and are now being contacted because we will require further information from you in order to proceed with legal action against this company. So that we may now contact a lawyer and put the wheels in motion it is necessary for you to respond to this E-Mail and send me the following information. Please be advised that this information will go no further than from my hands to the hands of our attorney so that he can properly contact you with the necessary paperwork you will need to finalize your desire to continue with this suit. Please respond to this E-Mail with the following information, in the exact format you see it in this message, Provide only the requested * information, if we need more information you will be contacted seperatly for that.

  • Your full legal name:
  • Your age:
  • Your street address:
  • Your city:
  • Your State (if applicable):
  • Your Country:
  • A telephone number you can be reached at:
    • Is this a home or work number:
  • Your web site domain name under featureprice.com (if applicable):
  • Your current email address:
  • The date you first signed up with Feature Price:
  • The date you first encountered your problems with Feature Price:
  • Approximatly how much has this problem cost you (in US Dollars):
  • Have you filed a suit with any other lawyers:
  • If yes, your lawyer's name/address/phone#:
  • Are you a minor in your location:
  • If yes we require your parent or guardian to handle this, have them fill out this form on your behalf please.

By placing your name after this statement you are agreeing that you are giving me (Michael A. Michniewicz, located at 2539 Casimir St. Philadelphia, PA. 19137, 215-743-6657) permission to contact an attorney on your behalf and place this information into said attorney's hands for the purposes of seeking compensation on your behalf from the entity known as featureprice.com owned and operated by Travis Johnson, located in Fort Myers, Florida. Do you agree to allow me to process this information on your behalf? If so, please type your full legal name below this paragraph.

  • Name of Complaintant:
  • Date Filed:
Sincerely,
Michael A. Michniewicz (dba: Michael A. Smith)
[email protected]
http://www.featureprice-review.com
InterGOV, International Web Police
Law Enforcement Officers Division, Director of IT.
Badge #03716L
http://www.leo-iwp.org

P.S. If you have questions that you wish to ask, do not respond to this address, send me E-Mail via my standard address at [email protected] send nothing other than the information requested to the address this mail came from.

Source: http://www.thecomputerwizard.biz/fp_letter_to_victims.txt

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Argent009 is part of a series on

Sites

Visit the Sites Portal for complete coverage.


Also international web police lulz.

Argent009 is a killer?!

Argent009 aka "RollerPig"

Look at him, for fuck sakes. His agenda is to MySpace the haters irl and brutally sodomize his enemies with the tip of his mighty, mighty spear. He doesn't fucking care for human life. BEWARE!!!!

Argent009 apparently cannot even write an Amazon review without proposing violent acts against his fellow man:

"This site is a propogator of spyware and adware. If this is how you do business you deserve to be put out of business faster than you can say 'Chapter 13'. If you support sites like zedo.com then you support cyber-terrorism, digital theft, the destruction of private and public property and the invasion of privacy of every individual on the internet. This site should be targeted and shut down immediately! I found these so-called "REVIEWS" while hunting for a method to REMOVE Zedo's spyware intrusion on my computer after 12 different spyware removal tools failed to kill it. My next step is to kill it by reformatting my hard drive and calling a lawyer to file a lawsuit against this company. If you have been affected by Zedo's evil activities, I suggest you contact an attorney today and file a report with the Better Business Bureau. Companies like this should be shut down and their owners taken out and shot in the head!"

No one at Zedo could be reached for comment concerning whether or not its owners had yet been taken out and shot in the head. Nonetheless, Argent009 was reported to Amazon for his violent threats by a concerned citizen who just happened to be e-stalking him, lol.

Sockpuppets

Argent009 has a school of sockpuppets to approve his points.

vvattage

Argent009 created a sockpuppet account on YouTube to try to mock wattagecat. Although his VLOG was meant to instigate and offend him, it actually came off as lol. Proof that it's difficult to break the law of YCTAT. However, once our detectives caught on to him, the video was deleted, alas.

The Mole

Nuvola
Moar info: The Mole.

The Mole is a squinty-eyed alter ego that argent used on his forum. The Mole is a person who supposedly logged onto bantown has seekrit ties.

WMD's

Weapons of Mass Degeneration.

lol, premium account at ebaumsworld!
OMFGLMAOROFLOL

The Lulz Intelligence Agency uncovers the dictator of the YouTube Street Team's stockpiled weapons of mass degeneration and a full scale invasion is declared. He has refused to disarm and ejected all LUN inspectors from the country, thus leaving the ED Internet Military no choice.

Obsession with the ancient

Like most YouTubers, Argent009 latches onto the latest Nornna-esque fad. Which just happens to be a 79-year-old man in adult diapers, Geriatric1927, in an to-his-eyes elaborate to-all-others clumsy and embarrassing, ruse to further his attention whoreing skill set. I.e.,:

This charming spam
Not spam?
Even random e-people agree, he's a Nazi

Source: http://thefates.wordpress.com/2006/08/15/geezer-virus/

Some argue that, in fact, Argent009 is perpetrating the perfect crime by raping this poor Alzheimer's victim repeatedly behind closed doors, leading to more tears shed in the shower by the victim than all the tears shed in the showers at Auschwitz.

Scuffles with Wikipedos

   
 
I am Argent009, view me on YouTube, what other proof could anyone need?
 

 
 

—Argent009 is the definition of Unwarranted Self Importance

Well, my e-diagnosis is that you're a self-loathing moron with an inferiority complex who craves the acceptance and adoration of others as an authority figure

As reflected here in the talk page for the Geriatric1927 article on TOW, Argent009 does not understand the conventions/common courtesies of wikifags.

Regarding edits that don't designate Argent009 as GeriatricBumLover1927's heir designate or whatever gayness:

Whoever is editing the entry for askgeriatric.com to say he has no control over the site, stop it now, you are a bold faced liar. That is Peter's official website and he has complete control over it. I am Michael, his friend who set it up for him, none of you have any knowledge of this situation so quit your nonsense. If it's edited again I will report it.

Notice how he throws around the power words to try and establish his credibilty? Anywho, the pedos babysitting the article then go on to pee-pee slap him for his idiotic formatting and putting things like "DO NOT EDIT" next to links to his website in the links section. He then throws this temper tantrum:

See Point #1, wasn't I clear enough there for you? I don't do a lot of Wiki editing. As for arguing my case better. Sorry, I wasn't aware that having the person that this Wiki article is about say "THIS IS MY OFFICIAL WEBSITE AND THIS IS MY FRIEND WHO IS DOING IT FOR ME" wasn't a valid enough arguement... As for "threats", reporting someone for messing with a wiki article, you're just plain wrong. Users have been blocked from even accessing Wikipedia for abusing it in the past and if you continue to abuse it you can be blocked. Do I need to show verifiable proof of this too?

You're going to Internet jail, buster!

I could go on but I've proven my point as far as it needs to be. Anything you may say from here on out is worthless blithering and you should just save your breath. —The preceding unsigned comment was added by Argent009 (talk • contribs).

Oh boohoo you big baby. PROTIP: FOUR FUCKING TILDES. Also, he cites the Stephen Colbert/TOW drama and congress edit wars as proof that the internet police are on the case!

One last bit of irony. Here he is trying to mock the wikipedos for calling his self-appointed stewardship of GeriatricOvenOperator1927 a bunch of unverifiable bullshit:

Next time I'll have him write it out in triplicate, have it notorized and delivered to the homes of everyone who uses Wikipedia for you. Adding the links (redirects, what the heck ever) was an attempt to show you the PROOF of what was said.

Given the fact that he's now FILLING OUT FORMS AND HE HAS *57 OMFGWTFBBQROFL, this is sincerely, honest-to-god milk of a true lol-cow.

Declaration of War

To prove his hatred of Jews and children, as well as his love of fascism, he has declared war on all that is good and true. plz view

Final Warning

Argent With Ol' Painless
   
 
...You'll be tried as adults. Okay. Don't make any mistakes here. The world's changed since 9/11...
 

 
 

—Argent009, YouTube Street Team


   
 
...I got absolutely no problems with killing one of you...
 

 
 

—Argent009, YouTube Street Team


   
 
...I have a profound respect for all human life, ED/Bantown are not humans, that's all there is to it, they're not even classifiable as "life" at all to me. Though apparently they RESEMBLE living things, they're not deserving of anything other than extermination. Cockroaches are more deserving of life....
 

 
 

—Argent009, YouTube Street Team


   
 
...shame your own parents didn't have the decency to do the right thing and shove a coat hanger where it belonged....
 

 
 

—Argent009, YouTube Street Team


   
 
...Yeah, I have some sort of personal vendetta against these people, you're right. I won't stop until each and every one of them is gone. Trash like this do not deserve the same rights as real human beings, they sure as hell don't deserve a luxury like access to the internet, they're inhuman scum.....
 

 
 

—Argent009, YouTube Street Team


   
 
...Yes, I believe they should all be put to death before they do serious harm. It's that simple. Do I think it's murder? No, I think it's the proper way to treat vermin. We are at war with terrorism, these are terrorists in every sense of the word, it's not murder, it's eliminating the enemy....
 

 
 

—Argent009, YouTube Street Team


   
 
...Where did you do your basic training?...Tell me? Can you? Didn't think so. Blow away child...
 

 
 

—Argent009, sado-machistic pedophile, YouTube Street Team

Source: Comments section


   
 
...You braintrusts love to try to compare me to a Nazi, but that's backwards. You're the fucking Nazi's, I'm the guy who's eventually going to see your reich felled and the lot of you shot for war crimes. Or had you forgotten, war on terrorism? You assfucks ARE terrorists...
 

 
 

—Argent009, an war hero, YouTube Street Team

Source: More comments

Enjoying the publicity

Argent009ad.png

Starting over

Obviously overwhelmed with all the smack he talked as an internet tough guy, Argent009 followed through with a final solution, to Delete his youtube videos.

An Internets Entrepreneur

I SELL CRAP ON THE INTERNETS

Argent009 needs YUO to help him stay online by buying cafepress products so he can use the $0.50 markup to finance a batcave for the Street Team

"Buy some ugly garbage from this shop and help support my habit of wasting my time on YouTube."

You heard the man, do it! And do it from: http://www.cafepress.com/argent009

DO NOT STEAL THE IMAGES THEY ARE COPYRIGHTED

Selling out

guess which crippled appendage the lucky winners tattoo is going on?!?

As if selling his disgusting face on a T-shirt isn't enough, Argent is now trying to sell his body on ebay for advertising, you can buy a tattoo on his arm for a starting bid of a mere $10,000 or buy it now for $50,000 in non-internet money. How delusional can you be to think someone will want to spend money advertising on someone who has a pathetic 600 youtube subscribers (mostly wattagecat socks) and talks about killing people on the internet, crying about being butthurt and pretending he is a NSA Agent? Great publicity for your company!

If typical Argent009 behavior ensues expect to see Argent009 claim to be sponsored by Google/YouTube/Steve Chen in the near future. Alternatively for megalulz you can cut him an Internet cheque and get goatse tattooed on his arm.

The LiveVideo Saga

Argent serial blocking and messaging general wattage.
Argent009 and LemonHoles
So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, good night!

Eventually Argent009 switched to LiveVideo. Unfortunately it was not to last, as batshit rantings against random LiveVideo users drove The Promised Land against him, and he has since gone into exile once more, searching for a place that that will accept him.

Re-invention

Recently, Argent reinvented himself as a Mike Skehan clone with something called “The Ass-Hat Report”. However instead of criticizing other YouTube users, he just spends what seems like days talking about how butt hurt he is over subjects that have long died.He appears to believe that ED is now supported by YouTube in their campaign of hate, because one of his videos was deleted due to AIDS and fail. Oh, and he showed mudkip pussy. It can now be inferred Argent definitely lieks mudkips. Apparently he also believes ED is a cohesive organization, and that a wiki asking for donations to maintain their site is now considered internets panhandling. After dragging his butt-hurt ass across the comments sections of his videos, all of which possessed rational, well typed and put together arguments as to why he failed so miserably at teh internets, and why he's a fag that won't just let shit go, Argent chose to take his characteristic Nazi-esque final solution of deleted his Youtube Videos. In another characteristic act, Argent chose to project his feelings of butt-hurt in a "this is so funny" video towards anyone that disagreed with him ever. He now does not allow people to embed videos, so follow this link for great justice.

Argent's rampage against MyLemonHoles

In 2006, Argent went on a ban spree against a fucktard named MyLemonHoles who claimed to have cancer. Besides giving massive donations to KFC and McDonalds, this is the only thing Argent has evar been useful for.

The bantown threat from Argent to Argent!

Argent threatens himself in the name of bantown.

Trivia

Did you know that Argent009:

  • is now known as Argentium009?
  • has a transcript full of drama?
  • has filed a Class Action LOLsuit?
  • wants to "kill" Moneyhouse
  • according to Argent009 his best friend is geriatric1927
  • Founder of the YouTube Street Team (est. 2006)
  • is under the impression YouTube paid Renetto to create the Judas_YouTube_blacklist
  • Fantasizes and has threatened shooting his internet enemies with a firearm under multiple occasions
  • Knows of people who are conspiring to kill YouTube haters IRL. "...You guys are going to--get---hurt...". This, if true, can land himself is IRL jail for at least 100 years.
  • Gotten free pizza (the joke was on ED because "they know me at all the pizza places here," lol, fatass)
  • Has attempted to file class action lawsuit over internet many times before, most recently on ED
  • Psychoanalyzes those who troll him.
  • Deleted his Youtube Videos
  • Claims to work for the NSA.
  • Claims to be an officer for the "Web Police"
  • Believes Steve Chen cares about his internet drama
  • Insists that all the people in the youtube civil war involved were going to jail...
    • ...were all going to be tried as adults
    • ...were going to try to plead insanity
    • ...and that he himself was going to prevent those caught from profiting by Selling books when they get out of prison.
  • Claims to have spoken with FBI agents
  • Claims FBI has placed a physical trace on his telephone
  • Called the FBI, on multiple occasions, also claiming to have spoken with agents.
  • Labels EDiots as "little terrorists" [3]
  • Only talks to a few highly subscribed or Featured YouTubers.
  • Pretends to speak on behalf of Geriatric1927 because he has no popular support of his own.
  • Made various news posts on his website about ED
    • Noone visits his website
  • Made a sock puppet on his forum named The Mole to try to scare the EDiots
    • No one visits his forum, either. lol
  • Wants all the dealings of the 'Street Team' to be held in secret (Secret Service SS anyone?).
  • Stays up all night and sleeps all day (obviously fapping, because everyone faps at night).
  • Uses copyrighted music in his videos, which is ILLEGAL (and an activity he could be suspended for), but he enjoys the fine art of telling other YouTubers how they should run their channels.
  • Has a serious temper. As many children, women and innocent animals will attest: NEVER FUCKING RELAX AROUND ARGENT009 -- IT IS NEVAR SAFE
  • The Mole believes he has a special "one on one" relationship with the creators of YouTube.
  • is the frienemy of [[theredskull]
  • Argent claims the makers of Livevideo stole the ideas for the site out of his mind.
  • Tries to sell his body on eBay [4].
  • Argent009 is slowly taking control of all of geriatric1927's finances - so he can steal his money and buy a giant dildo
  • Claims to hold the rights to use copyrighted music, such as Pink Floyd in his videos. A little known fact is that Comfortably Numb was written about his lower body.
  • Is the morbidly obese version of Jesse Ventura.
  • Believes in free speech.
  • Would like you to "bring it"?
  • Argent009 makes rather large purchases of dolls that he plays with and rubs on his moobs.
  • Argent's email is [email protected]

Disregard that...

After some 2 years of videomaking OTI, and taking some serious steps towards a self-induced coronary, Argent recently made a video (concerning the drama on VH) wherein he seemed to have drastically changed his perspective on internets and trolls. Argent, someone who used to consider the internets very serious business, has now seemingly changed his philosophy on trolls and his past...


   
 
There are a few people who you guys would consider "haters" that were able to teach me a few things about being a vlogger. One of the first things is if you take yourself seriously, and you're a vlogger...you're asking for trouble. You have to realize that if you're putting your face out here on the internet, you're an attention whore, and you are asking for people to criticize everything you do. You're asking for people to look at your videos and pick out everything you could do that could be possibly wrong, and point it out. Why else would you be on here if you weren't a bit of an attention whore?
 

 
 

—OH SHI-

Why it's important

The fact that one of the most trolled men in the history of the internet has managed to do a complete 180, tends to suggest that trolling not only works, but more accurately that it has the power to even help the target in the longrun. Some others, though, seem doomed to repeat history forever.

Current

Argent's been a little inactive for most of 2008, but with the advent of Vloggerheads, and amidst the hub bub over their TOS, copyright issues, constant bawwwfest about trolls, and renetto's shitty running of the website, he made some serious progress in trolling renetto.

Argent 2012

Feud with WWE United States Champion Zack Ryder

Wrestling News Source: Zack Ryder Involved In YouTube Flame War

   
 
Unskippable pre-roll ads are total fail, especially when they're on videos from people who make a buttload of money from being on TV every week, yeesh! Do you really need the extra money that badly? Treat your fans properly Zack, don't put ads on your YT videos like a total tool
 

 
 

—OriginalArgent009

   
 
Hey moron. I have nothing to do with these ads. WWE does. Thanks for the feedback. #ignorance
 

 
 

—LongIslandIcedZ

   
 
Then why doesn't the channel have WWE in the title, I thought this was YOUR channel and YOUR show. So it's just another WWE production, yawn
 

 
 

—OriginalArgent009

   
 
As I said...you are ignorant...you are wrong...and you are not my Broski.
 

 
 

—LongIslandIcedZ

Wrestling past analyzed

Initially ED stated this:

  • Argent009 wrestled for ECW and his handle was Harbinger (of doom)

After some BB.com analysis, it was suggested that he might be CW Anderson.

That and there is no Harbinger, of Doom or otherwise.

Gallery

Videos

See also

External links

Resources

His websites

Many of which are related to YouTube, Crikey!

Media

Other mentions

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Argent009 is part of a series on

Sites

Visit the Sites Portal for complete coverage.

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Argent009 is part of a series on YouTube.

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Distinguished Individuals

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Those Dying Alone

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Featured article December 1, 2006
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