Bernie Mac

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"Don't you be eatin my chicken, cracker"
He knows all about that card counting

Bernie Mac was an unfunny actor who played such notable roles as "Token Black Guy" in Oceans 666 and "Token Rich Black Dad" in The Bernie Mac Show. The lulziest thing he ever did was die of pneumonia, because who dies of pneumonia anymore amirite?

Bernie Mac got his start at Chicago's Cotton Pickin' Club. He eventually turned to stand up to support a 5-flush-a-day jenkem habit. Bernie then pulled an Eddie Murphy where he went from funny stand-up comedian to D-List sitcom host. Luckily he didn't try to remake My Girl Wants To Party All The Time. Unluckily, he didn't live long enough to be v& for picking up a trap.

Goodnight sweet prince.

Bernie's Cause of Death[edit]

Bernie Mac's cause of death took place in a stark white room where Mac attempted to masturbate with anal beads and ragu sauce. After over 9000 hours of brutal anal self mutilation, the once white walls were covered with feces, ragu, cum, ass hair and what was left of Bernie's shredded rectum. Authorities are trying their best to cover up several photos the event that leaked on the internet.

Bernie's effect on gambling[edit]

Since the tragic death of John Ritter, many internet gamblers have been waiting for further developments in the Bad Santa Deathpool. With Bernie's passing, this has switched the Deathpool into trifecta mode and has caused a huge upswing in demand for Billy Bob Thornton on Deathlists. What this means to the casual observer is absolutely nothing, but to a concerned and careful gambler, having Mr. Thornton in your Deadpool is almost as good as owning sixteen bingo cards down at the local VFW.

If your name happens to be Tony Cox or Brett Kelly, you had probably watch your ass too.

This is basically a good thing[edit]

Berniemacshow.jpg
Bernie Mac, ready for rAIDS

By dying of a shredded rectum, Bernie managed to avoid a more humiliating death at the hands of a white cop. And now, good honest white folk (the only kind of good honest folk) can sleep that much easier at night knowing that there is one less murderous nigger on the streets. And we can all take comfort in the fact that it is now slightly less likely that a darky will break into your house, steal your daughter, rape her, then sell her on for crack money. Let this event be a starting point, for a whole new wave of "pneumonia" to sweep through the nigger community, starting with the rest of the talentless niggaz in show-business. I call Will Smith.

External Links[edit]

Bernie Mac Is Dead -Video

[WatermelonsFried Chicken]
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