BLACK BUTLER or Kuroshitsuji 黒執事 if you're a weeaboo, by Yana Toboso can be best described as a great idea and what could have been a really fantastic Animu or manga series that could have competed with the best of the best like Akira and Evangelion if she could have focused on the story more and didn't let it get turned into another factory of faggotry because she felt the need to sell out to 16 year old girls and boys who want to be girls.
Black Butler or Kuroshitsuji 黒執事 is about an emo 13 year old boy by the name Ciel Phantomhive who sold his soul to a demon by the name of Sebastian Michaelis to help him take revenge on his enemies who murdered and dishonered his family and who also performed a nasty ass raping on him when he was 12 and were planning on selling to him to Michael Jackson after he was broken in properly. The plot states that when Ciel's arrangement with the Demon Sebastian has been completed and all of Ciel's enemies are dead it is agreed that Sebastian will be allowed to devour Ciel's soul. Cool premise so far.
As the only living member of the Phantomhive family it is Ciel's duty to take over his family function of policing the underworld, both criminal and Paranormal for Queen Victoria but despite being set in the Victorian period they have modern technology like the M1911A1 and M1Garande in the years around 1895 along with radio phones. Still a cool premise.
Unfortunately it's during all this, Yana Toboso feels the need to pad the plots or let them get taken over by unadulterd homosexuality like Flaming Gay Grim Reapers, Gender swapping angels that are Bisexual as either gender and the all around laugh your ass off favorite English gag of cross-dressing and sodomy jokes.
The Cool Characters
|Sebastian Michaelis||Most Likely named for Saint Sebastian because of his ability to takes insane amounts of damage like get shot to shit with bullets or arrows and survive. Said to have the form of a Crow or Raven in Demon form which in Celtic Mythology are servents of the Devil and represent death and dying. In Welsh Mythology the Crow is the phsical embodiment of the trickster character like the Coyote in Native American Mythology, both roles that Sebastian plays. Has a love of cats but despises dogs because of how man took a majestic creature like the wolf and turned it into a servant. Currently he is Ciel's butler and is bound to Ciel with the mark of the demonic contract and according to legend the more obviously placed the contract the stronger it is. Considers himself a gastronome and would rather eat 1 delicious soul than 1,000 shitty ones. Known for the catch phrases, "I'm simply one hell of a Butler." Or "If I couldn't do X, What kind of Butler would I be?"|
|The Undertaker||Absolutely batshit crazy but in a fun way. Was the original Death that fought Lucifer in Hell when Lucifer tried to become god by freeing man from the shakels of death. Can be easily bribed to do anything by telling him a good joke but has no tolerance for Anti-humor like the Aristrocrats or dirty jokes. Unlike the other Grimreapers, he pities the dead. Alleged to be so gorgeous that new born babies are willing to give up their souls with just a single look at him and is why he hides his face with his hair. His Grim Reaper tool is obviously a Scythe.|
|Lau||The Stoner Guru. Usually so high on opium he babbles but is intelligent enough to string the words that he is saying into coherent sentences that are relative to the problem at hand. Runs all the Chinese Opium dens in London.|
|Ran Mau||The perfect representation of what a woman should be. When Lau snaps his fingers she instantly has a beer in one hand and a sammich in the other. She is Lau's personal bodyguard and can always be found sitting on his lap.|
|Grell Sutcliff||Batshit Insane, souless ginger Grim Reaper that wants Sebastian to sexor his butt. Mostly in the show because he's lulzy as all hell. His Grim Reaper tool is a Chainsaw.|
|Tanaka||The original Butler for the Phantonhive family. Mostly stoned off his ass 99% of the show and is drawn in Chibi form when like this and just sits there staring at his tea. Can be a badass when he wants to be.|
The Rest Of The Characters
The Characters being placed under this section are here because they are absolute shit and damage what could have been the most badass Anime in recent years or because they are so seldom used that you never get to really know what they are about.
|Ciel Phantomhive||Main character and all around crybaby of the show. Only survives because of the perfectly timed Deus Ex Machina saves from his Demon Butler Sebastian Michaelis. So obnoxious and full of Unwaranted Self Importance that most people hate his guts by the second episode and only watch the show for Sebastian and a few other characters. Simply put, he's a little boy version of the damsel in distress that is necessary to establish a plot line. As per his contract with Sebastian, the mark of his Demon Contract has been placed on his right eye which he hides with an eye patch.|
|Madame Red||Aunt of Ciel Phantomhive who gets her name from her love of the color red. Had the potential to be a really good character but the writer treated her like chacki on a shelf. She and Grell are Jack The Ripper in the series, where Madame Red kills prostitutes that had abortions because of her anger tgat she can't have children of her own. If the writers had actually dramatized this earlier instead of waiting for her death confession she could have been a really compelling character.|
|Ash\Angela||Ash and Angela are the two forms of the Angel that serves as the antoganist in the later half of the series. The Male form Ash, serves as the personal Butler for Queen Victoria while Angela plays the role of a maid for Lord Barrymore and pawns the man/dog Pluto off on Ciel to the dismay of Sebastian. For the most part, Angela serves as the antogonist after giving away Pluto to Ciel doing mostly cliche villian stuff like kidnapping young girls to turn ito puppets or prostitutes, starting a Charles Manson like cult, causing people to go insane. It's not until near the end that it is discovered that Ash and Angela are one and a Fallen Angel who wants to burn tge world to ash to remove the unclean. You know, your basic cliche James Bond villain.|
|Lady Elizabeth||Lady Elizabeth or Lady Elizabeth Ethel Cotdeila Midford is the bratty 13 year fiance of Ciel Phantomhive. I'd like to say she's Ciel's fuck toy but he would most likely have no idea of where to start. Has a psychological need to arrive at Ciel's Mansion unannounced to torture his servants like a kid poking a dying animal with a stick until it's dead. Her favorite thing is to show up when Ciel is not there to torture his servants by making them cross dress in bright colors and putting up ass-crack ugly paper decorations in nearly every inch of the place because she has a need to make everything cute. Mostly there so Ciel doesn't seem so gay and dosn't contribute anything story wise.|
|Mey-Rin||The obligatory, sexy, ginger haired maid of Phantomhive Manor. Always horny. Wants Sebastian to gently make love to her for days on end right after he fucks her stupid. Extremely far sighted and said to have the Devil's Eyes because she can't tell you how many fingers you are holding up unless your hand is fifty feet away, but she is extremely deadly with firearms because of this. Mostly in the show for comedy because her farsightedness leads to her making mistakes. Really only taken seriously when someone needs sniped.|
|Baldroy||Alleged former American Soldier despite the artists depicting him in a British Army Uniform. Has an uncanny knack for surviving even the worst odds. Good with weapons and explosives. Mostly serves as comedy because, as the Chef of Phantomhive Manor, he's always blowing up the place trying to cook with explosives because he wants to cook quickly because as a soldier if he didn't prepare his meals quickly, he didn't eat. Another wasted character like Mey-Rin.|
|Finny||Your cliche, dumb as fuck Irish gardener. Mostly in the show as the twink for girls to schlick to. Was once a part of an Ubermensche experiment which gave him super hero level physical strength. Escaped from the evil Nazi Doctors experimenting on him and was taken in by Sebastian like Baldroy and Mey-Rin to work for Ciel Phantomhive at his manor. Like Baldroy and Mey-Rin he is incompetent unless the manor needs protecting. All around, not very interesting.|
|Pluto||A human that can turn into a giant demon dog. That's it. No use except for comedy. As a human he runs around naked and tries to hump Sebastian's leg and as a Demon Dog he runs around burning down the Phantomhive Manor Orchards when he takes a piss and pisses fire. No one would miss this character if he disappeared.|
|Prince Soma||An Indian, (Dot not feather), prince who for some reason actually like Ciel and wants to be his friend. Mostly put in the show to be like Butters in South Park and be a friend for the unfriendable.|
|Queen Victoria||The most wasted character in the whole show. All she does is whine and cry about her dead husband Prince Albert and her whole function for the story is to be killed by Ash so that everyone thinks it was Ciel and attack him which sets up the endgame for the series. You think the writers might have used her more because the historical period the show is set in is only named for her.|
- Sailor Moon
- Super Dimension Fortress Macross
- Gundam Wing
- Code Geass
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