|BRACE FOR IMPACT!!1|
Blu-ray (a.k.a Blu Gay) was made by the closeted-Jews(Jew.ish) behind the UMD, as a way of adapting to the market, just as the new Shota Robot Prostitute, and to replace the Now-Easily obtainable DVD, with a Cooler, more expansive shit of it's kind. Not to mention that ,it gets damaged more easily than normal DVDs. 99% of the Blu Rays you receive from Blockbuster Online will have damage somewhere where one minute out of the film will not play, usually during the minute of tits scenes you rented the movie for in the first place.
blu-ray will likely be remembered as "Betamax 2: Teh Quest for Moar Lulz." Sony is trying to force consumers to own a Blu-Ray player by integrating it into the Playstation 3, bumping the price to
$9999 now only $299. Too bad Sony does not realize that 80% of us are not spoiled wiggers who own HDTVs; thus making Blu-Ray a pointless waste of money to the casual consumer. Blu-Ray is being supported by major studios who needed a new way to convince consumers after they had already resold them the same dvd's multiple times just adding "super special edition" to the title. President of Warner Brothers Asscrack McDervish said "I love taking people's money. They are stupid sheep who will buy what we tell them". When not playing, Blu-Rays also make excellent coasters.
Blu-Ray's storage will be available from 25GB to about 200GB. Game developers have rejoiced, knowing that with the extra space (and the insane horsepower of the PS3) they no longer have to spend time to efficiently code games for file size or FPS. They also don't have to compress files anymore. Developers can be as sloppy as much as they want and get away with it, because 13 year old boys think bigger file size and minimum system specs = better games.
Blu-Ray disks use blue lazers, where DVDs and other old media use red lazers. Blue lazers are more expensive to make because blue lazers are clearly more awesome than red lazers. The blue lazer diodes are made of fairy dust instead of concentrated shit. This is why Blu-ray disks cost at least 100 dollars each and why nobody can get the drives.
- Find fairies
- Make diodes
Java Software Support
The whores over at Sun decided it would be a damn fine idea to put Java into all Blu-Ray players. So now Alan Turing can pwn both your browser and your TV! This basically just adds moar fail to the drives, which increases their Jew factor.
|A/1||USA • Canadia • Mexico • Uruguay • Paraguay • Korea • Japan|
|B/2||Europe • Middle East • Africa • Australia • New Zealand|
|C/3||China • India • Russia • Vietnam • Tibet|
|BINGO||Bat Country • Ghetto • Bethesda|
This shit also has new "features" that allow Big Brother to send your player to Bantown. If you're rich or retarded enough to actually buy a Blu-Ray player, you should probably hack that shit for maximum piracy and win. Fuck the man!
Companies that Have Jumped on the Blu-Ray Bandwagon
How YOU Can Help
- Don't buy a PS3.
- Don't buy a Blu-ray player.
- Don't be a wigger.
- Troll and harrass aforementioned degenerates if sighted IRL or OTI.
- 09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0 - use this cheat code.
If you still feel the need to purchase a Blu-Ray player, simply follow these steps:
- Enter a store and find a Blu-Ray Player or PS3 for purchase.
- Once purchased, Insert your penis in the tray and piss inside it.
- Calmly explain to the store that someone pissed in it, but do NOT ask for your money back. Stores will 99% of the time not question shit as long as you are not asking for money back. Exchange it for store credit instead.
- Spend said store credit on a 360 and a bunch of movies.
- Write a long blog entry about how you got a 360, a shit load of DVDs and games, and then had enough money to get your red-rings repaired. All of that for the price of one Blu-ray player.
Blu-ray is part of a series on
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