Brenton Tarrant

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Brenton Tarrant
Born 1990
Nationality Ausfailian MiniflagAustralia.png
Highscore Killed 51, injured 49
Top 50? 4th Ed high score bronze medal.png (Oceania: 1st!)
Style FPS single player, open world VR
An Hero? No; captured
Occupation Kebab removalist

2019. Just when everyone thought the year would be shit and lackluster, A NEW CHALLENGER APPEARS!!!! (+2 others!) Master Chief Brenton Harrison Tarrant, a.k.a the Kiwi Kebab Killer, is a heroic IRL JC Denton Aussie troll who took it upon himself to remove the Mooslem filth from a country whose existence was questionable at best. Fictitious or not, all experts agreed that New Zealand was the last place on earth to find Muzzlims. Before going on his rampage, Brenton posted his manifesto to 8chan and 4chan; there, he namedropped famous Swedish neon-nazi PewDiePie and Norwegian WoW aficionado Anders Behring Breivik as inspirations. This resulted in massive amounts of lulz and butthurt from the lamestream media who took his massive shitpost of a manifesto at face value, including the ever-trustworthy (((CNN))).

Like every other white devil before and after him, Brenton lacked originality and elected to lazily cover the same ground as ISIS by gunning down unarmed civilians in a house of worship. Perhaps counterintuitively, he believed that this would somehow influence the gun laws in an entirely different country and culminate in a civil war that would end with his ascension to the coveted role of king of the white pplz (though the title has already been claimed by Breivheart). While the lucrative Kebab Removal business is considered to be a well-respected trade, this koala molester shamed the profession by defacing his guns with autistic white nationalist slogans, the names of some dead European cunts, and memes staler than the rice cakes in your grandma's cupboard. Leave it to an Australian to shitpost this hard in real life.

Remember lads, subscribe to PewDiePie.


—Brenton Tarrant, minutes before topping the Oceanic leaderboard.

His Manifesto[edit]

Somehow, a woman decided to mate with this troglodyte.
Tarrant with his feral ghoul father.
As I sat there in the parking lot, in my rental car, I watched a stream of the invaders walk through the shopping centre’s front doors.


I had seen enough, and in anger, drove out of the the town.


I broke into tears, sobbing alone in the car.


—Brenton, crying like a bitch because he saw some black people.

We must inevitably correct the disaster of hedonistic,nihilistic individualism.
But it will take take some time.



—A guy who doesn't know how typing or punctuation works is going to save the west.

The United States is in turmoil, more so that [sic] at any other time in history.


—What is "The Civil War"?



—50 matches found, Ctrl+f.

Yes, the person that has influenced me above all was Candace Owens.



Combine Dylann Storm Roof's and Anders Behring Breivik's incoherent ramblings about race, Elliot Rodger's emotional overreactions to seeing people he dislikes, a healthy helping of the Unabomber's neo-luddism, and a generous amount of Charles Manson's delusions of starting a race war (though this is true for nearly every mass shooter who thinks they'll start a revolution), and you will get Tarrant's gay fucking manifesto, but with over 9000% more memes.

In his typo-laden 80-page manifesto filled with old memes and faggish poetry (some of it is his own), Tarrant lays out his worldview and goal, which boils down to him seeing a bunch of niggers one time and getting so angry that he drove off in a huff while crying and concluding that an Australian gym trainer who shoots up a mosque in New Zealand would start a race war in America.

In between trolling the normie media and inexplicable lapses in intelligibility, Brenton explains his grand scheme which essentially is to make American liberals repeal the Second Amendment, followed by a civil war that will divide the country by race. This will all end with with the revival of the white race, all thanks to him.

The reality is that New Zealand, which already had tight gun laws, took this opportunity to tighten them even more while planning to show their tolerance by increasing third world immigration. Meanwhile, just like every other spree killer with a manifesto about how his actions will change the world, Brenton will spend the rest of his life in jail, watching as nothing happens and society forgets him. This is hardly a punishment since New Zealand prisons are quite comfortable. In any case, Brenton is Australian so the majority of his ancestors were probably career criminals used to life behind bars.

Note the full head of hair—more proof that hair loss correlates with a higher chance of becoming batshit insane.
Tarrant recounts the kindness and hospitality of Pakistanis before killing a bunch of them back home.

Brenton Visits Mosque[edit]

Poetic justice: it takes a baldie to catch a baldie.
The first Strayan to win. Good on ya, m8!

Full livestream with no audio cutoff.

Aftermath at Linwood.
Blatant police brutality. They don't even try to hide it in New Zealand.

Teh media as accurate as always.

Before going on his shooting spree, Brenton posted a thread on 8chan to share his manifesto and photos and set up his GoPro livestream. All suited up, he advises his audience to "subscribe to PewDiePie." The stream follows him driving to his destination, the Masjid Al Noor by Hagley Park, the only large mosque in town that was Archive today-ico.png previously suspected Archive today-ico.png of generating Archive today-ico.png violent radicals, all while playing "Remove Kebab", Arthur Brown's "Fire", a Fallschirmjäger bass remix, and the Initial D theme song "Gas Gas Gas". Thankfully, because it was Friday in a heavily Muslim-infested part of town, traffic was light and he arrived quickly, so we are spared his top ten anime songs playlist and favorite YTPMVs. He goes down a narrow driveway and nearly gets stuck trying to turn around, calling his mistake "some Austin Powers shit"; so much for careful planning.

With the British Grenadiers (a song people have been dying to for the past 3 centuries) blasting out of his sound system, our protagonist grabs his AR-15 and semi-auto shotgun that's smeared with retarded /pol/ slogans and calmly makes his way towards the front entrance. The bystanders pay no attention to what they assume is a fellow jihadi returning from Syria. After his brother greets him at the door, Brenton starts off stylishly with some shotgun blasts into the crowd before switching to his trusty assault rifle. After emptying all of his mags into the piles of bodies and having nothing left to do, he stands bewildered then walks back outside to grab another AR-15. He strolls in again and skewers the resting kebabs for a few minutes (ensuring they don't use their Mohammedan powers to turn undead).

Brenton walks out yet AGAIN to shoot a woman who was napping on the sidewalk. He stares at a jerrycan of gasoline and contemplates burning the place down, but for some reason mumbles "there's not enough time," despite continuing to meander for another minute. He leaves some guns in the driveway, gets in his car, and takes off, turning the dead woman into a halal speed bump in the process. He nervously drives north on Deans Avenue with several loaded guns beside him. He brakes, shoots out his window at some passersby, frantically turns a couple of corners, runs out of service, and the stream ends.

After streaming, Brenton visits the Linwood Islamic Centre and removes an additional seven kebabs for dessert. According to the old media, a mudslime threw a credit card machine at our protagonist who got spooked, presumably under the assumption that it was a bomb (because let's be honest, it wouldn't be out of the ordinary), and runs away in panic. En route to his 'bonus objective', a mosque in Ashburton, he was rammed off-road and finally busted by the pigs 20 minutes after he fired his first shot.


Tarrant & Co. Pest and Kebab Removal Services Ltd. About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Class Setup
Item Accessories/Bonus
Brenton Tarrant custom ar 15 gun icon wtfperv.png
  • Paintball experience & Gov-issued gun licence to non-citizen. High capacity mags for moar ammo and solid stock for comfier recoil.
  • Secondary: Mossberg 930 semi-auto shotgun w/ red dot sight
Brenton Tarrant custom shotgun icon wtfperv.png
  • Can be bought online after you easily apply for a gun licence.
  • Perk 1: Ghost Pro
ATS Ghost Pro.png
  • Invisible against Spy Planes and Christchurch Central Police Station.
  • Perk 2: Slight Hand Tremor Pro
Perk sleight of hand 256 pr.png
  • Increases reloading time for all weapons, makes the shooter switch magazines randomly.
Swastika Alpha.png
  • Increased damage against Muslims, Kiwis, Jews, Americans, and non-Aryans.

Meme Review[edit]

Graded Score
Kill count: 51/20 (49 injured) Second deadliest mass shooting in the civilized (non-American/warzone) world.
Accuracy: 10/20 Could've killed far more mudslimes; pussied out due to a thrown card machine.
Style: 40/20 Plays Remove Kebab, baits media, fucks with Candace Owens, and a million other memes; the first post-ironic shooter.
Butthurt: 20/20 NZ peacefags horrified, as are Mudslimes the world over. TABLES TURNED MUTHAFUCKAS!!!1!!
Bonus: 20/20 Overall excellence in style, planning, and butthurt.
Total Score: 141/100 (S++)
Ausfags are even better at mass shooting than Burgers, proving shitpost supremacy once and for all.

See full ranking

Wanted Level

Sharia Police

Generated Lulz[edit]

The Tow Row Row of the Kiwi Grenadier About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]


Despite what the media would have you know, Brenton received widespread support from game developers, musicians, television executives, and YouTubers as evidenced by the DLCs, music videos, and episodes shown below.

Even TF2 celebrated the Kiwi Crusader

Christchurch: The Musical


Nick Bean also came out in support of Brenton

The Prodigy's review of Brenton's visit

The ting goes...

Trap Nation

Turbo Killer

Eidos Interactive’s endorsement in Deus Ex

Turtle Rock Studio’s endorsement in Counter Strike

GTA V gives Tarrant a 10/10

Doom approves

Oblivion was clearly accelerationist

King of the Mosque

The Blame Game[edit]

Eager to exploit a mass murder for political gain before the bodies turn cold, retards from every corner of the internet tried to outdo one another in a contest of who can assign blame to the most random target. The contest is currently in a 4-way tie between people blaming GamerGate (despite the movement being over for 5 fucking years) and 8chan (4chan too), journalists accusing PewDiePie of orchestrating the shooting while mistaking the Navy SEAL Copypasta for the shooter's actual life story, the classic "Blame Teh Guns!" narrative, and one Australian politician arguing that the MudSlimes just had it coming (which they probably did).

Unsurprisingly, New Zealand's parliament voted 119-1 on April 10, 2019, to place more restrictions on the sale of semiautomatics in what seemed to be the fastest case of "b& the scary gon."

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

The New Zealand Prime Minister then called a world leader meeting in Paris where the EU and several other countries agreed not only to b& the scary gon but also get the scary websites clearly to blame for violence b& too. Despite it being non-binding, meaning it could just be ignored, Emperor Donald said America would not be signing, citing some pesky piece of minor legislation called The First Amendment. Somewhat ironically, T-Series signed the agreement too. Several tech companies including major ISPs signed too, meaning the internet is now b&. This colossal piece of faggotry had an appropriately faggoty name, the Christchurch Call to Action Summit.


Watching Tarrant go on his rampage with plenty of time to fuck around unmolested may lead you to believe that policing is a joke over in New Zealand. Think again, motherfucker! Being basically an extension of Bongistan, the kiwi police are scouring the web for any and all violations of Sharia law. A teenage kiwi is being held without bail and facing Archive today-ico.png FOURTEEN YEARS in jail for sharing the livestream. Meanwhile, Null from the Kiwi Farms received a letter from NZ police demanding retention of posts and corresponding IP addresses so that they could go about vanning people for un-loicensed shitposting. In Internet Tough Guy fashion, Null responded by insulting the police sergeant who sent the email, dropping his own powerword, and bragging that they can't touch him because he resides in Burgerland. That said, if you live in New Zealand and are guilty of posting stuff related to the massacre, expect to be dragged to prison and raped by a pack of Maoris.

Null gets an email from New Zealand police
Police detective btfo!
Police detective scampers back to his cuckshed


List of Kebabs Removed[edit]

May they be fondled and groped by Muhammadﷺ in Jannah, ʾĀmīn.
Atta Elayyan (33)
Mucad Ibrahim (3) Pedobear mourning small.png
Sayyad Milne (14) Pedobear mourning small.png
Lilik Abdul Hamid (57)
Areeb Ahmed (27)
Tariq Omar (24) Pedo bear too old.png
Shahid Suhail (35)
Syed Jahandad Ali (34)
Haroon Mahmood (40)
Farhaj Ahsan (30)
Maheboob Khokhar (65)
Muhammad Haziq Mohd-Tarmizi (17) Pedobear mourning small.png
Asif Vora (58)
Ramiz Vora (28)
Ansi Alibava (25) Pedo bear too old.png
Ozair Kadir (25) Pedo bear too old.png
Haji Daoud al-Nabi (71)
Ali Elmadani (65)
Husna Ahmad (47)
Naeem Rashid (50)
Talha Naeem (21) Pedo bear too old.png
Amjad Hamid (57)
Kamel Darwish (38)
Linda Armstrong (64)
Mohammed Imran Khan (47)
Mohamad Moosid Mohamedhosen (54)
Hamza Mustafa (16) Pedobear mourning small.png
Khaled Mustafa (44)
Junaid Ismail (36)
Abdelfattah Qasem (60)
Ashraf Ali (61)
Ashraf Ali Razat (58)
Mathullah Safi (55)
Hussein Al-Umari (35)
Musa Vali Suleman Patel (60)
Ashraf al-Masri (54)
Hussein Moustafa (70)
Mounir Soliman (68)
Zeeshan Raza (38)
Ghulam Hussain (66)
Karam Bibi (63)
Abdukadir Elmi (78)
Mohsin Al Harbi (63)
Osama Adnan Youssef Kwaik (37)
Mojammel Hoq (30)
Mohammed Omar Faruk (36)
Muhammed Abdusi Samad (66)
Muse Nur Awale (77)
Ahmed Gamaluddin Abdel-Ghany (68)
Zakaria Bhuiya (33) (birthday)
Zekeriya Tuyan (46) (freed 7 weeks after getting shot)

The Christchurch Mixtape[edit]

Brought to you by yours truly, DJ Brenton Tarrant!
"I am the god of hell fire, and I bring you! Fire"

The Slammer Years[edit]

Like Anders before him, Brenton suffered troll's remorse and could not accept the high score from his mosque prank, so he pleaded not guilty to all charges. Following in the footsteps of his ancestors, he is now in his natural habitat awaiting trial. He has, however, Archive today-ico.png lodged Archive today-ico.png a Archive today-ico.png formal Archive today-ico.png appeal against the appalling treatment he has received in prison.

Known Aliases[edit]

I are not amused by this unfunny bullshit.

Brenton goes by several aliases, including:

  • Brenton “kills the unwashed inside every mosque” Tarrant
  • Brenton “subscribe to PewDiePie or get ready to die” Tarrant
  • Brenton “unloading mags all over kebabs” Tarrant
  • Brenton “invader crusader” Tarrant
  • Brenton “correcting the birthrate by crushing the caliphate” Tarrant
  • Brenton “cleansing New Zealand from all the heathen” Tarrant
  • Brenton “gang rape preventer” Tarrant
  • Brenton “you won’t survive on my Facebook Live” Tarrant
  • Brenton “removing the brown from your town” Tarrant
  • Brenton “You don’t eat pig meat? Here’s my eurobeat” Tarrant
  • Brenton “immigration curation” Tarrant
  • Brenton “5.56 to the heads of future ISIS” Tarrant


Our hero Brenton's fine work didn't go unnoticed, with many lolis affectionately known as "Brentonette's" praising and wanting to marry him.

See Also[edit]

Because of course he did.

External Links[edit]

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Adam LanzaAnders Behring BreivikAndrew KehoeAriana Grande MassacreBaruch GoldsteinBrenton TarrantCampo Elías DelgadoCharles Whitman's TumorCho Seung-HuiDevin Patrick KelleyFort HoodJack Gilbert GrahamJames HubertyJeffrey DahmerLuby's massacreMartin BryantMutsuo ToiNice Truck Attack 2016Omar MateenReina Nightclub MassacreSagamihara StabbingsStephen PaddockTed BundyVladislav RoslyakovWoo Bum-kon

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