Brokeback Mountain

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Brokeback Mountain (also known as Bareback Mountin') is widely known as the movie in which Heath Ledger admitted to being a raging faggot. Because of the epic lulz that resulted, a bunch of faggots decided to come after his wood. Despite playing totally not queer characters like the Joker in Dark Knight's Enormous Dick Rises, complete with scenes where he repeatedly licks Batman's dried cum from his lips, Heath Ledger was never able to convince the public he was a sane, stable, heterosexual individual for some strange reason.

Though not quite as gay as Prince of Persia, this film also gave some indication that Jake Gyllenhaal likes to wear his underwear on the outside, if you know what I mean?

Plot[edit]

Another scene from the movie.
A scene from Brokeback Mountain

Here are the main outlines of the plot:

  • After World War II ended, two furries start herding sheep.
  • Unable to fuck the sheep, they become sexually frustrated and begin to turn.
  • They decide to have buttsecks instead.
  • As you are a heterosexual male you will not understand how much baw and srs this movie is. At least that's what your girlfriend likes to scream into your ear every time you make a gay joke about it.
  • Cowboys don't need condoms.


Typical scene from Brokeback Mountain

Reaction[edit]

Weightlifting enthusiast Fereck was known to ejaculate 12 times during a screening of Brokeback Mountain that took place behind his local Gold's Gym. He said this broke his previous record of 9 times which was set as a reaction to Home Alone 2.

Origin[edit]

Brokeback Mountain is a 134 minute movie by Ang Lee based on a 15-page short story by Annie Proulx, who won a big-ass award because her shitty, preachy story had tender scenes of faggotry in it. (The Color Purple did the same thing, but with lesbians.) As a result of the small size of the short story (and Heath Ledger's amazing acting performance), the movie is filled with lots of bullshit filler material. Only two things from the original story remain in the movie:

  1. Gay Sex
  2. Cheating on Wives to have Gay Sex. (With men.)
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A spoof of brokeback mountain. See: Gloom

The remainder of the storyline was lifted from "Gay Cowboys Eating Pudding" from South Park. Trey Parker and Matt Stone attempted to sue, but quickly discovered not only does faggotry provide immunity to legal action, but they'd already ripped off so much shit to cram into South Park's nearest convenient orifice, nobody would take them seriously.

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Brokeback Mountain
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