One day, a bunch of butthurt republicans decided to make shit up on Faux News. Evidently, not enough niggers were making music at the time for these white assholes to criticize. As a result, they turned to video games as their scapegoat of the day. After a few rounds of mental masturbation, the Faux News crew attacked the game Mass Effect out of fucking nowhere. Lawrence was the main player for Faux News. She did a good job making stuff up and looked utterly fuckable. Anyways, Promptly after finishing their skit, the Faux News engaged in Satanic sexual rituals. Coopshit played the role of Beelzebub. Oh and the whole skit was dubbed "SE" XBOX. This gave rise to many lulz on a level that is over 9000.
After her expert opinion on the subject and getting pwned by the other gamer guy on TV, she asked the Faux Newz workers, "I can haz cock now?", not knowing that she was still on TV
The Great Butthurt Legacy
The whole episode provided many lulz for sane individuals. However, Mass Effect fanboys decided to get butthurt over the issue and decided that spamming the shit out of vidya gaems message boards was the appropriate thing to do. The disease spread to /b/ eventually.
At first, David didn't really care about another Faux News article. But once anon noticed how lulzy it would be to fuck her shit up, all of /b/ united against Lawrencesuckscock.
For mere lulz, some brave /b/tards backed up the whole Cooper Lawrence/Faux News bullshit campaign to magically raid the bitch and fight for the greater good. The first wave of dickery on her call-in show however, provided many anti-lulz due to the fact that she was made aware of the impending shitstorm a day earlier through emails and MySpace faggory.
Anyways, the bitch has a book or some shit, so fags around the interwebz found its Amazon page and one-starred the piece of shit to oblivion. Shortly after doing so, Amazon joined in with the butthurting and decided to start deleting one star reviews. Many people have inquired why Amazon is censoring its chivalrous reviews but no one really knows why. The main theory is that Amazon is filled with dirty, conspiring Jews. And well, Jews have to look out for fellow Jews.
A fellow anon's thoughts on the issue:
—Anonymous, on poetic irony.
UPDATE: Seems like this fucktard saw the errors of her ways. She even admitted her butthurting antics on NY TIMES. Be proud, you stupid niggers.
The Ultimate Butthurtee
EA apparently got severly butthurt by Faux News' stupid display of ignorance. They even sent arequesting an apology.
—EA, on poetic irony.
Once word of this spread on the intarbuttz, many newfag circlejerks were had to honor their flawless victory.
The Faux News Mass Effect Sex Debate
It's a well known fact that women such as Cooper need to gb2/kitchen
Cooper's Wikipedia page mere seconds before being edited by an unfunny fag
Cooper Lawrence is part of a series on
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