Cry of Fear

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Aspergerbenice.gif Cry of Fear fans have Assburgers Syndrome,
so you can't say anything bad! :-(


Be aware of that, you insensitive fuck.
A lot of work went into Cry of Fear!.

Cry of Fear is one of the worst fucking modifications ever created. It's made by Andreas Rönnberg a mid 20-something self-obsessed loser who thinks he's edgy and the best modder evar. Though Andreas claims Cry of Fear is something beautiful and deep, it's all just a load of shit. Due to the generic over-hyping by fanboys it gets nearly perfect reviews and even has let's play videos by PewDiePie cause itz so funneh amd skarey!1!!. The developers are also pricks who can't take any suggestions or criticisms without overreacting and banning the "offensive" users who are just pointing out that their mod is a steaming pile of horse shit.


Story[edit]

Our hero.

You wake up in a dark alley knowing nothing except that you are a total loser. You basically solve puzzles while going through constant annoying jump scares made for young children. Somehow, despite the main character, Simon, being a ginormous faggot, he has an affection for a girl he's known forever. While Simon fights off hundreds of Chris-Chan like monsters and autistic children, his girlfriend dies or some shit. He then kills himself upon realizing that 8 hours of your life have been wasted on this piece of shit mod. Essentially it's verbatim as his older mod, Afraid of Monsters, which is about a druggie od'ing and killing everyone because he thinks they're monsters. Except that it was better because there wasn't any shitty voice acting or ugly bump maps.

Graphicz[edit]

Aside from terrible story you also get terrible visuals! The team worked really hard at trying to squeeze bloom and bump maps into an old as fuck game. As a result everything is darker and looks retarded. It's amazing the mod doesn't fuck itself in the ass from all this un-needed and poorly coded shit. Day one they needed to have a post about how terrible it runs and what you need to do to run it, for real. But none of this matters because IT LOOKZ SUPAR AWESOME!!!

Team Psykskallar[edit]

ruMpel working really hard on Afraid of Monsters Cry of Fear.

Andreas, aka ruMpel, thought he was a really cool hipster when he made a team with a unpronounceable name. Team Psykskallar, as it's known, is of course full of lulz. ruMpel has constant baw fests about how much his life sucks despite getting money from a pile of garbage mod. He claims he's depressed and has serious issues. While most of the team was too busy sucking his cock so they could stay on the lousy team, one member told the faggot how it is. As a result, he was banned and Sporkeh is now ruMpel's e-nemesis.

Sporkeh's blog about ruMpel:

Because this is too long to post as a reply:

Lmao Andreas, your reply humours me greatly and if I could, I would write a recommendation letter to get you hired at Comedy Central. It's not stalking if you openly post your entire private life on the internet. I've been popping by occasionally to see if you'd prove me wrong about you, but so far you haven't, as expected.

I want to make this statement right now before I continue: from your messages it becomes crystal clear to everyone that you don't hate me because I have terribly insulted you or anyone dear to you. I didn't bang your girlfriend, nor have I been making your life miserable. No, the only reasons you can ever come up with is because we have a different sense of humor, because I answer yes/no questions in meetings with yes or no and because I'm not supportive of your destructive behavior. All those points are irrelevant anyway, because in the last 3 years we've had around 2 meetings, and outside of discussing concrete CoF points we NEVER talked to each other (for a good reason). You are consciously disregarding everything I say and are only able to reply with the things that you don't like about me, as if my behaviour is the issue here or as if I'm the reason you're SO depressed and "hate life". You keep on repeating that I'm scared. Scared of what? You? You are nothing to be scared of. Do you want me to wave my cock in front of my webcam? Are you going to beat me up?

I have been battling bi-polar disorder and insomnia for years. Treatment is difficult because benzodiazepines, SSRIs and anti-psychotics do not mix. I take the maximum daily amount of Zoloft, and have to take additional medications to counter the heavy side-effects. On official tests I've consistently scored high on psychopathy and schizoid personality traits. I am being monitored in the hospital on a semi-regular basis because at times I can have certain episodes. You don't know about this, simply because it's none of your concern, it's only mine. People have told me I'm weird since I was born, are you really that naive to think that I don't know I'm often the odd one out? I have accepted who I am and am comfortable with myself, if that makes you anxious or feel uncomfortable then that is completely your problem. If you want to make this into a dick-measuring contest you will lose on every point. You don't realize how wrong you are every time you say I don't understand your problem.

The reason that you don't understand what I'm trying to say is that you're too stubborn to sit back and take a moment to try and comprehend everything, or just because you're a moron. I'll simplify it some more for you: you are a bitch. When you feel down, instead of doing the right thing and calling friends, family or the people who are treating you, you cop out and cut yourself, just enough to draw blood, but not deep enough to be actually effective. You resort to unproductive, self-destructive behaviour and openly parade it on the internet as if it's something fucking edgy and cool. You glorify and wallow in your depression, it's supposedly your source for creativity (lol), but at the same time you call it a DISEASE.

My point about you having all the things you have, wasn't that stuff makes you happy. You read and understand what you want to read and don't bother to look for any deeper meaning. My point was that all your basic needs are fulfilled, and as such you cannot blame your depression on being poor, isolated or because you're not happy with your job. Stop taking those things for granted. I know depression is that you feel sad for no reason at all, but that's exactly when you have to think for a while and make a decision for yourself: do you want to pick yourself up and fight to become a happier person, or will you just let everything go and stay unhappy for the rest of your life? I made a decision to work on life, slug it back in the face and I can only slap myself for not doing so sooner, but you have a strong tendency to take the easiest way out and encumber hundreds of strangers on the internet with your issues, apparently looking for praise and a digital pat on your back from some kid you don't know, instead of actively trying to rise above your sadness. Wake the fuck up. Instead of confronting me and try to challenge my views, you banned and blocked me because I said “lol” on your shit emo picture, and even went as far as deleting my account on the CoF boards, also taking down over 2 years of community history in the process, just because of your arrogance and inability to cope with people who disagree with you. You are the most narcissistic person I know.

You demand respect but have done nothing to deserve it. Until you make the decision to work on yourself and set things straight in your life, you deserve every second of feeling miserable in my eyes. Stop wearing depression as a cool badge, it's fucking embarassing to watch. You are completely right when you say that I don't feel empathy for you, you don't deserve any of it and you have nobody to blame but yourself for hating life.

Fuck you and bye bye <3


Here are ruMpel's butthurt replies:

   
 
I don't care about your fucking essay-writing shit. I banned you bacause you're a dick, and nobody on the team likes you. Explain that.
 

 
 

—lol

   
 
So much gay here.

This is not a competition of who can own who. Still, I banned you because you are a dick. And by a dick, I mean because you were trying to be funny on behalf of my illness, and saying how gay I am. It's just not the way someone should act, and it made my bottle of lulz fill over. I got mad, and banned you from everything, since I can't stand the way you treat people.

I don't understand it. If you have that many problems, how can you not understand my problems? Why did you have to be so rude and say such gay things about me? What have I done to you? If you don't like the way I express myself, leave it! It's not your business anyway.
 


 
 

—Andreas being super cool.

   
 
Uh. Nice stalking there. My friends and family already knows my situation. They have seen me cut myself, and they know I'm not feeling well. But I guess your social skills are too fucked up to understand that.

I don't even understand what you are trying to say here either. And I also like the way you are trying to act tough when you in reality are just a scared nerd hiding behind your fake names and unfunny pictures. I can tell that you must have fucking aspbergers or some real empathy issues. I mean, why did we, the whole team, think you were so damn rude and weird? And all you had to say in our team-skype-meetings was "yep.." "nope..". Just so fucking scared. My point here is that you must have some real social issues that you can't understand how other people feel. I mean, the way you bring up "ow you should be happy cuz you have a gf and an apartment blabla", just proves how LITTLE you understand how human emotions works. So you ACTUALLY think STUFF makes you happy? Have you ever heard of a disease called depression? No matter how much fucking shit you have, won't make you happy. I don't even know why I'm replying to you. I'm sick of you.
 


 
 

—lol

He'll always make lulzy replies and he's as easy to troll as furries. Same goes for the retarded community(if you can call it that).

Facebook/Donations[edit]

Since ruMpel is pathetic and knows he's never accomplished anything other than making 1 inch deep cuts in his arms, he felt the need to expand on his unwarranted self importance prior to Cry of Fear's release. What easier way to do this than getting over 9000 likes on the Facebook page. He promised that if all his fans did this they would receive a release date, something that should be given away by default. They'd also get bonus media including ridiculously long gameplay videos that makes you question if the team really did anything during half of the development. On top of asking for such a retarded request only Chris-Chan could follow through, they also want you to donate all the money in your wallet and you'd get an extra weapon in the final game mod. WOW!!11@!!

Gallery[edit]

See also[edit]

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