Dallas Sniper Attacks

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Ima put a bullet in yo ass!! NOTICE
This article is related to black crime. Never relax around the blacks!


Micah-johnson-dead.jpg
Micah Johnson
Nationality Americunt MiniflagUSA.png
Highscore Killed 5, injured 9
Top 50? No
Style Co-Op
An Hero? No (killed by R2Dindu, the best police robot)

On the evening of July 7th 2016, irate Nigra Micah Xavier Johnson decided that Chris Dorner deserved a sequel. During a "peaceful protest" for Black Lives Matter in Dallas, Texas, Micah, brimming with groid rage directed at YT's police, armed himself with an AK-74, infiltrated a building, and positioned himself to view the pigs on the streets below. Once this stage of his mission was complete, he sniped them from long range distance; assassinating 5 and severely wounding 9 others (7 more cops, 2 NPC bystanders). The Dallas protests were formed in response to the fatal killings of two Dindus, just days prior to the shooting spree. Due to the nature of the attack and the "victims" primarily being pigs, the shooting is expected to bring in intense drama and lulz to Dumbfuckistan, despite the country experiencing a Mass Shooting every 3.291 seconds and the Sniper attacks rolling in relatively few frags. Even so, we applaud the nigra for managing to pwn some piggies, as he went for the High Score on "Nightmare" difficulty, rewarding him an immediate 20 point bonus to his graded score. This shooting spree was the deadliest attack in America against cops since 9/11.

Trigger[edit]

What triggered these events? It might've been the fact that just days before the assassination plot, two Dindus were brutally killed by cops, seemingly for little reason (as if a reason to kill niggers was even necessary). There was also a huge "peaceful" protest going on around Dallas at the time. Considering the fact that they blak, its real dam possible they been doin sum stupid ass shit to those pigs. Pigs naturally fear brown colored ppl as it reminds 'em of predators like bears and shit.

Naturally, niggers hate the police. Whenever a pig brutally pwn's a nig, this sets off a chain reaction in the Black Hivemind that causes them to chimp out. Often, they burn entire buildings down, cause millions in property damage, and can only be stopped after a legion of thousands of cops institute martial law in tha hood, till da niggas wear they selvz out. The turbo-nigger sniper squad had every reason genetically to go apeshit. They had a higher IQ than the typical 60~80 niglet, and were also notable for actually being able to shoot straight. Thus, all these pigs get surprise buttsecks'd with the almighty, accurate power of a sniper rifle, available at your nearest gun sto', foo.

Perpetrator[edit]

Initially, it was suspected that there were up to four snipers stationed around the area, but it was shortly revealed to have been the work of Micah Xavier Johnson and another perpetrator who is currently unknown and presumed to be at large. Johnson and the piggies played grab ass in a parking garage for a bit, but then the fuzz decided it was time for a donut break and sent a bot in to deal with his magnificent, shapely, statuesque ebony ass. As everyone knows, nigs and technology don't mix, and the bot decided to allah ackbar himself out and away from lil Micah's bix nood ramblings. Micah was too busy shucking and jiving to notice the robot was packed with enough explosives to take out a tank and was caught in the blast.

Use scrollbar to see the full image



Micah Johnson Facebook 2.jpg

Videos[edit]

Monkeyshooting.gif
Live gameplay footage of one of the perps.
Alleged instigator alias "Barry". If you recognize this individual contact the FBI. Be sure to tell them you saw the picture on ED!
Another shooter
Holy #$%*!!
"Witness interview
more footage
Heli footage immediately after the shots begin
The Young Turds report on it
King Nigger Obama does a speech
longer news report

Quotes[edit]

   
 
3 Dallas Cops killed. 7 wounded. This is now war. Watch out Obama. Watch out black lives matter punks. Real America is coming after you.
 

 
 

— Former Congressman Joe Walsh in a now deleted tweet.

   
 
We are looking for crisis actors for a government emergency drill between July 4-6th. Actors will be responsible for portraying different emergency scenarios in a simulated government terror drill. No experience is needed. Confidentiality agreements are required. Pay is $200. Please message for details.
 

 
 

— Now deleted Dallas Craig's list ad. Conspiracy or coincidence?

   
 
Guns are bad, mmmkay? Buy my mix tape!
 

 
 

— Big Nig Obama, inspiring peace and good race relations as always

Reactions[edit]

Despite the low frag count, the event brought in significant attention nationwide. Most whites BAWWW'd over their precious pigs being pwn'd, calling for hate crime legislation to protect cops. Meanwhile, a significant amount (possibly even the majority) of black people are legit praising and celebrating the attacks. Current independent investigations have shown that those Black Lives Matter chimps are planning more attacks on society at whole.

Twatter[edit]

As usual, the idiotic masses immediately chimped out and made death threats and other illicit and idiotic posts. If you find any death threats or calls to violence, please contact the FBI here, and report the liberal freaks out, for great justice. Do your part to keep the US safe! Be an hero, not a zero!

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

High Score[edit]

Graded Score
Kill count: 5/20 9 injured
Accuracy: 17/20 Niggers know how to use a gun, da fuk? HACKS
Style: 17/20 Straight out of GTA 5, plus enough supplies at home to start a real war
Butthurt: 16/20 Potentially triggers the "L.A. Riots 2.0"
Bonus: 20/20 Immediate 20 point bonus for successfully playing on Nightmare Difficulty
Total Score: 75/100 (C)
FUCK THA POLICE
(well, 3rd place on Nightmare isn't too bad either)

See full ranking


Wanted Level
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National Guard


Gallery[edit]

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Perpetrators[edit]

See Also[edit]

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External Links[edit]

Pol/ Threads[edit]

News Articles[edit]


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