Fortnite

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FOR KIDS

Fortnite (also known as Fortshite and/or Abortnite) is a shitty, worthless, unnecessary and extremely overrated game made by Epic Games that retarded 13-year old boys and stinky manchildren in their mom's basements obsess over. The game itself is a massive rip-off of Overwatch, Left 4 Dead, and Minecraft, showing no originality or value which would make it remotely interesting.

Gameplay[edit]

Nevermore Reaper from Overwatch (Left) and Fortnite's Raven (Right). As you can see, Raven is completely fucking unoriginal and autistic as fuck

Fortnite comes in three versions with basically the same shit, just a different set up and name, and most people will only get one of them anyways.

  • Fortnite: Save The World: The story mode and actual main game, which is basically the same story as Left 4 Dead or DayZ, just adapted into a shittier looking style. Just for this reason alone people don't get this flavor of the game.
  • Fortnite: Battle Royale: The more popular free-to-play version that every twink, manchildren, and little spergy kids play just for the sake of it being "hip" and "relevant".
  • Fortnite: Creative: A full on rip-off of Minecraft's creative mode. The only use for this is to make giant cocks.

In both versions the gameplay basically revolves around the same crap. Choose a class and skin, build structures, shoot people, do a fucking stupid dance, and win. It's what you would expect in any similar game but retards still manage to praise it as the best thing since sliced bread.

Fortnite has 4 classes to choose from, but unlike the other games like this, the characters have no personality at all, and they're just a bunch of different skins, because why give today's kids any substance to a game?

Soldier[edit]

The most basic class with generic ass looking characters who are mostly niggers and beaners, and the main favorite of children who play the game due to former reason alone.

Constructor[edit]

The only fun thing to do in Fortnite.

Basically the Heavy class of the game, just with a more "fancy" name to make it feel more original. The constructor's main perk is to build forts, constructions, and 10-feet tall dicks. Female skins in this class all have big asses and boobs to make the cocks of little boys and manchildren go harder than the game's difficulty (which is non-existant to make less lulzy ragequits).

Ninja[edit]

The Scout class of Fortnite, literally nothing fucking special except for double-jumping and mobility, and thus no one gives a shit about it.

Outlander[edit]

The harvesting profession from different RPGs turned into it's own class, with an edgy name and array of character designs that look "epic" and totally not like rejected Overwatch characters.

The Fortnite Community[edit]

Ninja, the current poster boy for virgin faggotry.

As mentioned above, Fortnite's community consists of the following people:

  • Retarded children with way too much freetime
  • Virgin manchildren living in their mother's basements
  • Soyboys and twinks
  • Lifeless JewTubers and Twitch streamers
  • You

All in all, Fortnite has one of the worst and most cancerous player bases ever, rivalling that of Roblox and Overwatch. Fortfags usually spend their time streaming themselves playing the game, doing the retarded dances in real life, and jerking off to Rule 34 while crying in their mom's basement alone. Some people even make money off of playing this game by streaming, most notably two soyboy virgins Ninja (powerword: Richard Tyler Blevins) and Ali-A (powerword: Alastair Aiken).

Ninja literally fucking claims a skin for himself.

V-Bucks[edit]

Give us your ID, oy vey!

V-Bucks are the in-game currency of Fortshite, which can be used to buy shitty items, retarded looking skins, and dances which serve no purpose whatsoever.

Just like with ROBLOX's Robux and other videogame currencies, jews do money-grubbing scams to lure little kids in and suck off the money from their parents' credit cards, like every good little jew would do.

In fact, the scamming got so bad that Epic Games themselves had to issue a warning out to players about it.

A new "challenger" approaches[edit]

Just to prove that Fortnite is and was nothing more than just a cancerous trend, some people are already hopping to the next bowl of tumors by EA's new money machine called Apex Legends, though people are still denying this.

How to troll Fortnite fans[edit]

  • Tell them to go outside
  • Claim that Fortnite is an unoriginal piece of shit (which it is)
  • Report their Epic Games accounts and get them banned
  • Fake a giveaway, you will see how many will believe it
  • Say anything bad about Ninja, then laugh at their rage
  • Be a better player than Ninja, watch him report you for "stream-sniping"
  • Call them Autistic. They'll scream for hours

Gallery[edit]

VICTORY ROYALE!!! About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]
Worst Fortnite Content
Ausfailian news show, A Current Affair warns concerned mothers about Fortnite

See also[edit]

External links[edit]

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