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Furniture Porn

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Furnitureporn.com is a pornography web site that caters to objectophiles, people almost as fucked up as Furries: the Furniphiles. They have the best taste in porn, since there's nothing more abstractly sexy than furniture items sexing eachother up. Plus, most of the people reading this see furniture every day- unlike women or even animals, which they rarely come in contact with. It's also a good case in point why Web 1.0 sucks. Go to the site and tell me your eyes don't bleed from the horrible page design.

Furniphiles[edit]

Furniphiles (or furnies, for short) are people who get off on strategically placing pieces of furniture in compromising positions. Then they take pictures of the furniture and masturbate furiously. Flavors of furnies include:

  • Amateur Seating
  • Bondage
  • Office Party, and the ever popular
  • Outdoors

furnitureporn.com[edit]

The most popular furniphile site, furnitureporn.com is also the most comprehensive. Everything from armoires to vanities is depicted humping other pieces of furniture with raw, uncensored detail. Whether it's chair-on-chair, chair-on-desk, or desk-on-desk, all of your filthy perversions can be found here.

Furny Porn is broken up into several subsections, the most lulzy of which is the "Letters" page. There are also user-contributed movies and photos, and it used to have a fairly active Message board which has since e-died.

HAWT CHAIR-ON-CHAIR ACTION (BARELY LEGAL)[edit]

MOAR HAWT SEXXORS[edit]

Other uses of furniture porn[edit]

People want you to download furnie porn on the chan because it sends the party van to your door. This is because sofa's are hawt and you aren't behind enough proxies for what they put in that "Wood glue""

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Furniture Porn is part of a series on

Sex

Visit the Sex Portal for complete coverage.

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Furniture Porn is part of a series on

Sites

Visit the Sites Portal for complete coverage.

[Case ClosedOpen Up to Us]
Furniture Porn is part of a series on Psychology
Antisocial personality disorder Hannibal Lector.jpg Mental illness & Disorders

AcrotomophiliaAddictionAgoraphobiaAlcoholismAlexis Pilkington SyndromeAlzheimer'sAnorexiaAntisocial personality disorderAnthropophobiaAnxietyADDADHDAsperger's SyndromeAutismBimboficationBipolarBorderline personality disorderBug ChasingBulimiaDeep thinkerDepressionDick ImpalementDown's SyndromeDyslexiaEating disorderFactitious disorderFake SchizophreniaFauxlimiaFeminismGender dysphoriaGirl on the Internet SyndromeHeterophobiaHero ComplexHFAHistrionic Personality DisorderHutchence's SyndromeHyperbolimiaInadequacyInconsistent personality disorderInsanityLiberal Butthurt SyndromeLow Self-esteem'Missing White Woman' SyndromeMultiple personality disorderNapoleon ComplexNarcissistic personality disorderNeurotypicalObsessive Compulsive DisorderParanoiaParanoid personality disorderPeter Pan SyndromePost-Traumatic Stress DisorderPsychopathyRetardationSchizophreniaSeasonal Affective DisorderSelf-diagnosisSelf InjurySexsomniaSickfuckerySociopathySocial anxiety disorderSpecial Snowflake SyndromeTrolling Induced Transsexuality SyndromeTulpaUnrealistic expectationsVictim complex

Fetishes:

AcrotomophiliaAquaphiliaArborphiliaAudiophiliaAutogynephiliaBalloon FetishBestialityCarmen Electra complexCross DressingDollfiliaEmetophiliaEmosexualityEproctophiliaFatty Fetish (Female Fat Admirer) • FetishismFoot FetishFurniture PornFurrismGoo girlGuroHeterophiliaHomophiliaInflation FetishJapanophiliaJungle FeverLesbian pedophiliaLotion PlayMacrophiliaMaiesiophiliaMechanophiliaMpregNecrophiliaObjectophiliaOedipial ComplexParaphiliaPedophiliaPlushophiliaPregnant LoliPregnophiliaQuicksand FetishRangerphiliaSpectrophiliaStatuephiliaTrichophiliaVoraphiliaWet and Messy FetishismWetlookXenophiliaYellow feverZoophilia

E-Psychosis:

Chronic Troll SyndromeDeletionismE-goE-PsychiatristE-PsychiatryETDHivemindI-DosingI have a 140 IQIRC DiseaseImaginary girlfriendInternet Disease & Internet Disease ChartInternet poverty delusionsInternet RehabInternet troll personality disorderMega ultra super geniusNerdy Fandom Gateway TheorySex by associationLulz-BlindnessWikipedia's Greatest Hits Diseases

Experiments:

ask.fmBrainwashingHypnosisMilgram ExperimentScientologyStanford Prison ExperimentThe Hivemind Corollary

Sites:

Above Top SecretB/Bodies Under SiegeCYOCChatrouletteDefense Industries OrganizationDeekerFoolQuest.comInkBunnyNeuticles.comPsyke.orgWarpMyMind.com

See also:

American Psychiatric AssociationAngerASMRChild abuseConscienceDreamDSMEnlightenmentIntelligenceLobotomyPsychiatristySerial KillersTake the meat bridgeThe Law of ConformityTrigger Warning