| FACT ALERT: |
Grawp has become an unfunny one-trick pony.
—Grawp, 23 May 2008
Grawp is Wikipedia’s foremost page-move vandal, and has taken the position that Willy on Wheels previously occupied, and far surpassing him. Like all sequels, he is tougher, faster and has more devious ways of wasting the time of and harassing sysops on TOW. He has used countless sockpuppets, and uses every single one to make numerous page-moves, topped off at the end with a personal attack in the unblock request, like the cumshot that ends a porno. It is believed that he is an Americunt and edits on open proxy, therefore cannot be pwned by IP directly. He is also a Harry Potter fanboi as evidenced by his username, and his edits tend to reflect an interest in other fandom crap such as Dungeons & Dragons, although he clearly gets laid more than Wikipedians do, as proven by this, and claims to have a massive cock. All of this adds up to him being one of the Wikipedia sysops’ most hated vandals, especially given his purported status as a major ladies’ man, much to the envy of Wikipedos.
His career began in September 2007, and he wanted to promote how much he loved his brother, hence him moving all pages to HAGGER??????????? and HERMY??????????? for the lulz. Although he was relatively unfunny at that point, his editing style shows a clear pattern towards the fact that he is probably either an EDiot, a /b/tard, or both (latest news has confirmed that he is, in actual fact, both). He also reverts legitimate edits as vandalism.
He has succeeded in getting many pages protected due to repeated recreation of deleted material and has even had the high honor of being recognized in the MediaWiki title nigger list. So much for “denying recognition”! His vandalism is permanently visible in the logs, for example such as here when they were pwnt epically with goatse and LOL WUT, often with the help of a bot, to cause the browsers of Wikipedia sysops to crash, creating an epic win against them. His vandalism logs are often used to make statements about culture, politics or society, such as here, in the names of the pages he moves them to. He also always tells users to visit the GNAA website which crashes your computer.
Grawp was born to a used car salesman and a hyena in Southern Maine and raised on a small island 1500 miles west of Portland Oregon (the island is shaped like a anti muslim symbol). As a kid, Grawp would stick AIDS needles into his teachers buttocks so much so that a flag of him doing just that was used by his middle school as their official flag for 3 years (8 of his teachers died from him doing this to them). Grawp then was sentenced to four (4) years of house arrest. Grawp was so hated in school, he had to have 6 bodyguards carry him everywhere in school.
- Main article: JarlaxleArtemis
In a past life, Grawp (real name Jeremy David Hanson) was the Wikipedo JarlaxleArtemis, a user who was frequently banned because he couldn’t play well with others and picked fights with Linuxbeak. As a result of his antics, he was a repeat visitor to Wikipedia’s e-Court. Jarlaxle also despised the TOW administration and had no problem making his feelings clear to them.
Well, not really. He got this page made about him that outted his first middle and last name, birthdate, school, and more information than even Daniel Brandt could uncover. He kept trying to blank the page to no avail. Eventually, the page became a talking point on Wikipedia Review for why Wikipedia administrators deserve outting, so Krimpet deleted it. (Krimpet would later restore and delete it again in a fit of bipolar pique.) Finally, in a fit of benevolence, the offending dox were baleeted by arch-nemesis Alison. He then left TOW only to return bigger, badder, and better as Grawp. Some argue that his vandalism rampage is a cover for the having one of the Top 10 Gayest Tabletop Characters as his username.
Grawp has a tendency to let things like this ED page get to his head. He has sought to spread his name by using his HAGGER??? move vandalism on the Insurgent W/i/ki, and spams links to this ED article on the various /b/s out there. The mods only smile and delete all posts, as his powers stop at the border of Wikimedia and Futaba. If anything his imageboard spam, coupled with his attacks of anon wikis, makes him look pathetic despite his win on Wikipedia. However, it should be noted that Kakama5 is also rather butt-hurt about his pathetic little wiki being ræped to such a great extent.
In particular, Grawp needs to realize when spamming /b/ that Anonymous is not his personal army, and repeatedly asking /b/tards to vandalize Wikipedia is a form of cancer. Yet in spite of /b/ not being his personal army, it sure does act like one. This was proven at a TOW CheckUser case in which Grawp was found to have spammed the shit out of 4chan and possibly other chans with requests like “Please go to http://wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=B&action=edit&oldid=204349478 (b0rked link, do not click) and click ‘’Save page.’ ” In this, Grawp is actually a successful troll because he gets masses of mindless anons to replace the featured article with HAGGER? and also causes massive butthurt to Wikipedia admins who really cannot cope with the epicness of Grawp. This is because contrary to common belief, Anonymous are just sheep who are part of a cult that is just as dangerous as the Co$ and will do whatever someone who is smarter than they are tells them to (well, the newfags at least—the old anonymous is a tougher nut to crack). It is under debate as to whether the lulz generated by the cancer is beneficial in the long run.
He also lol’d when Jack Merridew was pwnt for abusive cockpuppetry, and hates the checkuserfag Thatcher with a vengeance, because he automatically blocks Grawp socks. You can help by creating as many accounts as possible then donating them to Grawp, like the dream life of a serial masturbator making money by donating his semen to lesbians who want to get pregnant, which both spreads his genes and he doesn’t have to take responsibility for the consequences.
Grawp is living proof that when Jimbo said that allowing anyone to edit as one of the core principles of Wikipedia, it won’t work like Jimbo said it would. Jimbo made the analogy of sitting near strangers in a restaurant. Yes, they can kill you with that steak knife if they want to, but that doesn’t stop people going out to restaurants, does it, so why should it stop a freely editable website being successful? The reason is people like Grawp. People behave OTI differently than they would in real life, hiding behind their anonymity. However, recent research has suggested that the evidence points to Grawp being a genuine Mmbabies in real life, who would stab you with that steak knife given half a chance whilst screaming a battle cry of “HAGGER???????????????????.” Therefore Wikipedia is actually doing the wider world a favor by keeping this nigger animal sitting in a chair harassing people OTI than going out and committing IRL vandalism, or murder.
It is true however, as we all noticed, that it’s not just Wikipedia that Grawp has a problem with. He seems indeed to be a misanthrope, who will use maximum force to destroy and corrupt as much as he can on any wiki he can find. An example of this is the obscure wiki CorpKnowPedia, which long ago died a painful death due to spambots, eating up its remains like maggots feasting on a rotting corpse. Despite this, Grawp is like the vulture who is man enough to challenge the little maggots at their own game, and thus CorpKnowPedia’s festering remains have been pwnt with HAGGER???????????? everywhere and even the spammers are wary about touching it now, because HAGGER????????????? damages the reputation of the bullshit they are spamming. CorpKnowPedia is also famous for having an AFD debate about it, whereas it’s one of at least 9,000 articles that quite easily met the criteria for speedy deletion yet got debates, anyway. Grawp murdered Wikipedia user Kevin Gorman in 2016 by poison. Grawp did this due to Gorman promising to rid Wikipedia of Grawp once and for all. Grawp's constant harassment of JohnCD caused JohnCD to die in 2017 of the stress that Grawp put him under.
—Grawp on Amy Whinehouse.
—Grawp on the United Kingdom.
—Grawp on the 7 July 2005 London bombings.
—Grawp on horses.
—Grawp on sex.
—Grawp on the future formation of Eurabia.
—Grawp on Mario.
—Grawp on SlimVirgin.
—Grawp, on AIDS.
—Grawp on Mike Godwin.
—Grawp, on Poland.
—Grawp, on Paul McCartney.
—Grawp, on Dick Cheney.
—Grawp, on Britney Spears.
—Grawp, on death.
—From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia! Actual extract from TOW’s Grawp article (merged into the Rubeus Hagrid page).
—HalfShadow 05:23, 9 June 2008 (UTC)
—-Jéské (v^_^v E pluribus unum) 08:05, 9 June 2008 (UTC)
Grawp's determination to infuse the staid, boring realm of Wikipedia with delicious entropy has generated a considerable amount of rage among its admins. There’s a likelihood that the faggots at Wikipedia are going to make a serious attempt at contacting Grawp’s ISP for long term abuse, as set out in this manifesto. However, it is believed that Grawp is too hardcore for such elementary tactics and will continue to provide lulz for a long time to come on Wikipedia. It is also believed that Urban Rose has reacted to this ED page by removing personal information and a photograph of her, which will remain on ED longer than Fred Phelps’ idea of how long Heath Ledger’s stay in Hell will be. Grawp has recently stated that while he hates muslims, he makes an exception for ISIS members. Grawp claims that ISIS are freedom fighters and as long as they don't attack Israel, he will support them.
It is also known, however, that there is another vandal of not nearly the same stature—Headstrust (in actuality, an account created by Grawp before he was known as “Grawp,” as he has been editing Wikipedia since January of 2005). He, along with Molag Bal, has been showing behavior that imitates that of Grawp recently, to the extent that the wikifags can’t even determine whether it’s the real Grawp, or just a body double. However, the real Grawp is cool with Encyclopædia Dramatica (and is a regular contributor to this page) and any vandal spamming ED with Grawp-style vandalism is most likely not the real Grawp.
Another serious issue raised came about when Grawp, like Daniel Brandt, has said that Wikipedia is being used for spying. The website shows a map of the world, and records IP edits that take place and shows the location they are taking place in. Although Wikipedia may seem a welcoming place full of familiar pop culture subjects, do not be deceived - edits there leave a trail that someone can follow to come back and hurt you using. Wikipedia is simply not a safe place to edit, unlike Encyclopædia Dramatica.
Grawp’s method of spamming 4chan also highlights a vulnerability—both of Wikipedia itself, a useless mass of shit masquerading as something of value, and that of the supposedly anonymous editors themselves. For example, when anons are told to vandalize a page with “HAGGER???????” some of them actually do it, and not only that, they do it wrong, as in here. This user’s WHOIS information, revealed to absolutely any internet user by Wikipedia, gives anyone the ability to contact that anon editor’s ISP, which is just one reason why we should go down with the tyranny of Wikipedia nao. The other is that Wikipedia is a dangerous cult that is on a par with Scientology for those who become involved with it, and Grawp is a freedom fighter against the playboy, womanizing encyclopedist Jimbo’s goal of world domination, funded by his slaves, much as with Scientology - donating to Wikipedia is more than paying “tithes” to a church; Wikipedia is a more powerful religion than Christianity that Grawp is fighting against.
Also, Wikipedia anti-vandalism tools all have gay names, like “Huggle” and “Twinkle,” so when the slaves to Wikipedia install these programs they are being humiliated by their servitude AND by calling them gay names. Grawp assaults this faggotry like a hot knife cutting through butter.
From the Grawp-hating Wikipeon (now converted to the dark side of trolling) Urban Rose:
—Urban Rose 21:49, 22 April 2008 (UTC)
—Jéské (v^_^v Karistaa Usko) 22:16, 22 April 2008 (UTC)
—Urban Rose 01:27, 23 April 2008 (UTC)
—Jéské (v^_^v Karistaa Usko) 01:29, 23 April 2008 (UTC)
A number of changes have been made to Wikipedia because of Grawp. Like Willy on Wheels single-handedly caused Wikipedia developers to create a feature called “autoconfirmation”—where an account has to be at least four days old to move articles, edit semi-protected pages, upload an image over another image with the same name, mark new articles as “patrolled,” etc.—Grawp has also inspired changes in MediaWiki technology. Due to Grawp’s rampant page-moving vandalism, Wikipedia now has a “title blacklist,” and auto-confirmation for an account has been increased so that accounts still have to be at least four days old, but they now need at least ten edits., Also, there is now an “action throttled” feature where non-admins can only move eight pages (not counting the attached talk pages) at a time. After moving eight pages, they have to wait about thirty seconds to move more. The throttle also applies to IP addresses and non-autoconfirmed accounts if they try to make more than eight edits in a quick succession.
Furthermore, all of the chaos and havoc caused by Grawp during his page-moving sprees has resulted in some rather lulzy drama, as can be seen in the faggotry and whining and , when the admins tried to stop Grawp (and failed miserably, of course) by editing the title blacklist page and ended up accidentally preventing all non-admins from creating any page anywhere on Wikipedia that had a space in the title (which included all user talk pages); this has happened at least three times so far. Because the only requirement for becoming an administrator on TOW is the ability to suck the Cabal’s cocks, it comes as no surprise that incompetent shit like this occurs in the first place.
Grawp, with the help of some rather dimwitted TOW admins, has also managed to considerably slow down—and sometimes even freeze—the entire English Wikipedia database a few times, resulting in nobody being able to edit or make any changes to Wikipedia (King Jimbo is also partly to blame, as he spends most of the money Wikipedia makes from donations on and hookers instead of Wikipedia’s servers). This occurs when a page with several thousand revisions is deleted and/or undeleted in response to Grawp’s vandalism purposefully (, , , , , , , ,  , , , , , , , , ) or by mistake (, , , , , , , , , , , , , ).
Another feature has been added because of Grawp called “global blocking.” This feature is used to block IP addresses from editing all Wikimedia wikis except Meta, including their own talk pages. Grawp was the first person to be globally blocked; however, he can easily get around this minor obstruction by simply using proxies. More upgrades in reaction to Grawp include separate expiry times for edit and move protection to pages and a new option for administrators to disable the ability for a user to edit their own talk page when blocking (without having to resort to protecting the talk page). Also, the title blacklist now prevents redirecting pages to blacklisted titles, and replacing all the page content with a small amount of text sometimes no longer makes an automatic edit summary, as can be seen by comparing the edit summaries of these two edits: ,  (yet some still do work ).
For one night, Grawp took over two wikis owned by Wikipedo admin Werdna, who was using them to test a new feature called the abuse filter, which he designed primarily to stop Grawp and other page move vandals, although ironically the testing ground for this feature ended up being abused in itself. Due to Werdna’s extreme naïveté, Grawp became a bureaucrat (one step higher than an administrator) instantly upon registering an account at one of his wikis. He then gave himself global sysop, steward, checkuser, and bot rights on that wiki and another wiki on which Werdna was testing his ultimate weapon against Grawp, the “abuse filter.” Grawp globally locked all accounts that were already registered on Werdna’s wikis and stripped them of their powers, including Werdna (Andrew), Alison, Kylu, and Cometstyles (Warpath). Soon, he invited other EDiots to his new wiki and showed them how to become god-accounts like himself. Grawp and the EDiots’ reign of terror came to an end when Werdna came back online and locked the database. He then deleted the anti-religion wiki and reset the entire database of the test wiki.
It seems that Grawp has also managed to get a Wikipedo blocked by inadvertently using the same IP address as him. Lol, Wi-Fi.
—Thatcher 23:15, 7 May 2008 (UTC)
All this means, though, is that Grawp and others will just undo twenty edits from RecentChanges, without regard to whether that is reverting vandalism or reverting good faith edits, then go on a HAGGER???????????? spree.
Wikipedia admins are now at the stage where they’re sick of hearing about Grawp. Their method is “revert, block, ignore.” Grawp, meanwhile, seems to be running out of sockpuppets. Could this epic lulz-fest be coming to an end?
—Keegan 07:05, 26 April 2008 (UTC)
—Jéské (v^_^v Karistaa Usko) 08:11, 26 April 2008 (UTC)
—Urban Rose 13:11, 26 April 2008 (UTC)
—Keegan 15:54, 26 April 2008 (UTC)
Whilst the butthurt Wikifags cannot do anything about the revision-edit vandalism from 4chan, they are starting to close in on Grawp’s page move vandalism on the English Wikipedia…but hey, that’s a point…have non-English Wikipedias and other Wikimedia projects had their own taste of HAGGER????? yet? Wikia? We shall see.…
(Actually, other Wikimedia projects have felt Grawp’s wrath already, as have Uncyclopedia, and Non-English language Wikipedias. A good place for Grawp to hang out would be “Proposals for closing projects” page at the Wikimedia Meta-Wiki, in which the Moldovan Wiktionary, which was made by butthurt Moldovan nationalists who can’t accept that their language is the same as Romanian, could be epically pwnt with cries of “HAGGER????????.”)
The anti-lulz could also be reversed by you, reading this page, imitating Grawp. You could create an account, wait seven days and make twenty small edits to articles (the required limit for page moves), then launch an assault on them with multiple Firefox windows open and the pages to be moved to at the ready. Note the title blacklist and “HAGGER” as it stands cannot be used, although Character Map can be used to get lookalike characters to allow HAGGER to slip through. However, Grawp also is known for inventive titles that he moves them to, so a degree of creativity is required to result in a beautiful page move vandalism log—imitating Grawp truly is an art form.
Wikipedians believe that Grawp’s reign as the king of page move vandalism has finally ended after he was denied by Wikipedia and all his socks and categories were deleted. The results of this are yet to be seen, although some argue that sticking your head in the sand is not a viable defensive strategy. However, as the admins devote more time to fixing the exploits in MediaWiki that Grawp uses than actually contributing content, Wikipedia has effectively been trolled for life.
GRAWP HATE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU FAT RETARDED NO LIFES WHO SPEND EVERY SECOND OF DAY ROLLBACKING IP EDITS FROM SCHOOLKIDS. GRAWP THINK YOU EVERYTHING BAD IN WORLD. HAVE ANY YOU EVER GOT ANY PUSSY? GRAWP GUESS YOU THINK IT FUN BLOCKING VANDALISM-ONLY ACCOUNTS BECAUSE OF YOUR INSECURITIES, BUT YOU ALL TAKE TO WHOLE NEW LEVEL. THIS EVEN WORSE THAN SCEPTRE JERKING OFF TO RIANA.
DON’T BE A THATCHER. JUST BLOCK ME WITH YOUR BEST CHECKUSER. GRAWP PRETTY MUCH PERFECT. GRAWP CAPTAIN OF THE PAGE MOVE TEAM, AND STARTER ON THE UPLOADING GOATSE AND LOL WUT TEAM. WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY, OTHER THAN “REVERTED EDITS BY GRAWP TO LAST VERSION BY JESKE COURIANO”? GRAWP ALSO GET ENCOURAGEMENT FROM ED, AND HAVE SEXY BITCH (SHE JUST SUCKED MY MASSIVE COCK, SHIT WAS SO HAGGER????????????????????????????????) GRAWP THINK YOU ALL FAGGOTS WHO SHOULD BECOME AN HEROES. GRAWP LAUGHS IN YOUR FUCKING FAGGOT FACES FOR LISTENING.
PIC RELATED: IT’S GRAWP AND URBAN ROSE
- Hagger — Grawp’s brother.
- Jéské Couriano
- Persian Poet Gal
- Urban Rose — a drama created by this very ED article
- And all other Wikipedia admins, each and every one of whom has been pwnt by Grawp.
- How to do Grawp-like techniques whether saying Hagger, Diesil, or something else
- Avril Lavigne
- Zodiac Template Vandal
- Willy on Wheels
- His WP user page. -
Deleted because Grawp’s massive cock was too big for WikipediaRedirected to his shrine
- How Wikipedians couldn’t handle Grawp’s enormous cock
- Grawp gets a thread on the Wikipedia Review!
- Yet another WR thread about Grawp
- Epic win on Wikia’s Final Fantasy wiki
- A bunch of butt-hurt Wikipedos bitch about Grawp.
- Grawp is clearly as famous as WoW, if not moar
- Search for posts about Grawp on Wikipedia on Google. Leads to literally hundreds of comments from pissed off admins and editors.
- Grawp on YouTube!
- Grawp’s Bebo page.
- Grawp’s MySpace!
- Grawp on Wikia.
- Grawp on Urban Dictionary.
- Grawp is the Wikipedia Review owner, Somey!
Grawp is part of a series on
Visit the Trolls Portal for complete coverage.
Grawp is part of a series on
Visit the Wikipedia Portal for complete coverage.
|Featured article May 2, 2008|
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