Hannah "Swinger" Bond was a 13 year old emo poser !!11 fan of the band My Chemical Romance. She is noted for becoming an hero by hanging herself, and the shitstorm
her parents MCR fans have caused about her death.
Before an hero was even in the ground, her parents started going to various media outlets blaming My Chemical Romance for their daughter's suicide (instead of their shitty parenting). Many lulz ensued.
Old Media's Reaction
Several lulzy articles in British newspapers The Telegraph and The Daily Mail were penned following this tragic turn of events. Lulz include comparing emo faggotry to a religion, as seen in this quote:
—The old media has clearly done its research.
On May 8th, a number of courageous /b/tards stumbled upon her memorial page and posted links to it on 4chan. Needless to say the site was swamped with lulzy comments from bored Americunts and insomniac Britfags. A total of ten pages worth of suicide jokes, meme spouting and a healthy dose of necrophilia were posted (not to mention people coming to tell Hannah that she did it wrong) and much lulz was had by all. Of course, the owners of the memorial page being 13-year old kids guaranteed that the best was yet to come.
When her friends came back from school the next day and realized that their precious memorial page had been fucked with, they promptly complained to the Bebo admins. The Admins, however were too busy sucking their own cocks to care about some shitty memorial page and the shitstorm escalated from there. As the evening wore on, and more /b/tards came online to survey the havoc they found themselves in a particularly savage flamewar, which continued throughout the night and into the next day. It was only after 1pm on Saturday 10th May that the banhammer started coming down.
The current state of her memorial profile is unknown, but the clear moral of the story is that bebo admins are some of the laziest fuckwits out there.
Since its inception soon after the bebo raids and not long after her death the article has become one of ED's most furious warzones. The mass blankings and reverts have provided their own form of lulz. Although,this article about Hannah is no longer an edit war since her suicide was old news. Anyways,here is what some of the more literate members of the emo community have had to say about the article on Hannah Bond:
—Xpoisonxgirlx failing to understand the userbase or purpose of Encyclopedia Dramatica.
—Jrod1195 on not having a dictionary.
—Hiphoppopsawah on rhetorical questions and unnecessary capitalization.
—XoxIndy-cindyxox's reply to the question, "In a single sentence, tell us about retrospective psychoanalysis and the merits of the British Journalism establishment. Also being highly incapable of using a single full stop (or grammar)."
—NotSoHurt (clearly ironic sn) on how much YUUUU suk, in dramatically unnecessary capitalization and, well, I don't really know to be honest. Note she makes it a point not to capitalize personal "I".
A NOTE FROM A WHINY FAGGOT: Hey ,,, I Think This Hannah Bond Is Getting Out Of Hand A Bit Here :l She Was A Lovely Caring Girl And Now All Shee Needs To Do Is R.I.P Why Is Eveeryone Still Going On And On When Shes Up There Watching Down On The People She Loves Theres No Point In Arguing Who Done It And What She Done It For Yeah You May Blame Mcr When You Shouldnt But Maybe You Dont,,, All Im Trying To Get Through Is Why Dont You Leave Her Alone Shes Now Happy Where She Is. And Mcr Well They Havent Got Nothing To Be Ashamed About When They Havent Done Anything In The First Place,,, She Listened To Theyre Music Whats So Bad About That ? Maybe Im Missing Something Her Buht Honestly Its Just Pathetic Bitcching And Arguin And Taking Sides over Something Wich Really Isnt Worth Anything. Yes I Mean Hannah Bond Deserves Respect Even Though Shes Gone? People Are Stressing Over This Way To Muchh ,,, Hannah Isnt So Why Should You ? Get On With Your Lives And Leave Her To R.I.P Maybe Itll Be Better That Way ? Thanks Anyway And If Ive Saiid Anything Rong Then Email Me... OhSoScene__x@hotmail.com . :] Thankyou Anyway Hope You See My Point :] Andd Most Importantly Rest In Peace Gorguss Babe ,,, Hannah Bond x True Babe :] x
PS: Hannah isn't stressing because she's fucking DEAD.
- The original Daily Mail article.
- Similar article, from the same website, about the same subject, featuring the same pictures and captions, except this time it's written for women.
-  The emos' side
Fagbook memorial page http://www.facebook.com/pages/In-Memory-of-Hannah-Bond/115610748471884
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| Hannah Bond
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