I have 2 girlfriends and a truck fuck you
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I have two girlfriends and a truck fuck you, is a forced meme that graced 4chan with it's presence on May, 2nd. 2010 on a thread simply named "I can kill you all faggots" on /b/. A lot like the So Cash meme, some douche named Kevin types an open letter addressing /b/tards everywhere the following. This thread has gotten many /b/tards attention for rubbing it in their fat, oily, acne-riddled faces that they are nothing more than inferior, pathetic, basement dwelling trolls. It should be noted by the typed thread that Kevin appears to contradict himself many times in such a short passage by calling /b/tard's faggots while he also threatens to fuck them in the ass. It is obvious he has no muscles, and the photo shows that Kevin has completely mistaken his itty bitty, sagging man boobs for pecs, his arms are not built, and he bears a Mickey Mouse tattoo on his left arm. He is also a racist that wants to kill black people like any other typical white man. He is very ugly and, of course, has poor grammar. Now, the big question you're asking yourself: "Will some lulz be had? The answer lies within Kevin's contradicting speech. So come with us as we explore this phenomenom into the wonders of this strange troglodyte life form alpha male who wields a sharp instrument and has property to assert his dominance over the legions of lesser beings.
Though this proud, young man claims to own two women and a truck, all three are conspicuously absent from his photo. Even if he is not being truthful, it would be no surprise that Kevin honestly aspires to obtain these things. In rural America, "traditional families" are touted, though promiscuity, infidelity, and non-traditional relationships are quite common. Likewise, owning a pickup truck is the pinnacle of one's life achievements, since they are now considered expensive, gas-guzzling, obnoxious status symbols (their functionality is irrelevant, and what better way to show you've got money to burn?). Brandishing a large piece of cutlery, likely without his parents' permission, Kevin reveals his deep insecurities due to inner struggles and the possibility that he's a frequent target of bullying. Judging by the picture, it seems that Kevin isn't using the knife as a threat but rather he is going to do something totally awesome.
You might have a girlfriend if...
- Your cousin gives you a handjob
- Your second-cousin gives you a handjob
- You feel up your sister while she sleeps and then ejaculate in her hair before she wakes up
- You pop open a cold one
- Your sister gives you a handjob
- One of the previously mentioned family members blow you or lets you finger her
- One of the previously mentioned family members never files rape charges
- You fuck one of the family's livestock and it happens to be female
- You draw an independent Hentai comic
- You fap to the same porn actress
- You laced some random whore's drink with roofies
- You raped a guy down at the woods and made him squeal like a pig.
- Your dog licked your balls
- You beat her
Other Unfunny Variations:
—Chris Chan is making himself clear
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