In Utero

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In Utero was a brave and valliant almost hero, for he tried to actually bring some lulz to the frunz ridden lands of the Onision Forums and Runescape. Although he failed, he is still hated by the fascist emo cunts that run the shitty forum, but he is even more hated by the Runescape owners Jagex.

On Runescape[edit]

In Utero has had several accounts on Runescape, but his most influential ones was Durial321 and gingertom0.


The Falador Massacre[edit]

An event that players refer to as the 'Falador Massacre' occurred many years ago, on June 6th, 2006 (coincidence? I think not!). Following the release of Player-Owned-Houses which you upgrade by training the Construction skill, the typical RuneScape nerds raced to see who would get 99 first. The first person to do this was Cursed You. He held a party in his house to celebrate, where a fuckload of people turned up. Knowing there were too many, he kicked everyone out of the house.

But then a glitch occurred whereby some lucky faggot had the ability to kill players outside of PvP zones. This lol-troll (whose name was In Utero AKA Durial321) proceeded to a crowded server and approached the wonderful city of Falador. He then began to fuck bitches up, and in doing so attained God status amongst players. He began chasing and killing noobs around with his whip.

Several mods caught onto this, but for some reason instead of banning him, they yelled at everybody to get away from him. Seriously, Jagex must give their mods some rather pathetic abilities. There is only one known video of this instance, but unfortunately the faggot who recorded it put some shitty Nightwish music in the video before he uploaded it.

The rampage continued for over an hour, looting such valuable shit as a Green party hat which is only expensive because dumb rednecks who play this game can't afford green dye and paper. Finally, after a good deal of trolling, Jagex got their heads out of their asses and banned him. Epic lulz were had. And thus ended the legacy of In Utero. Henceforth, many retards have attempted to immitate durial's pwnage, but none have succeeded.

Durial321 in action, the music ruins it though. (If you don't want to listen to it, just mute your speakers, fucktard.).

On the Onision Forums[edit]

As Sp4all[edit]

In Utero originally joined the Onision Forums,in early 2010, under the name Sp4all, which was a name he apparently stole off a user on a porn site back in 2003. He mainly spammed batfink images and made stupid jokes about Alizee.

Just over a week into his ordeal he befriended a fugly attention whore named Jebus Moon, and she begged and begged him to change his username to Son Of Jebus.

As Son Of Jebus[edit]

As SOJ, he became a real pussy. He started listening to snap-crackle-jpop music just like all the other fags there. He also started cosplaying as characters for several shitty anime shows.

By June 2010 he was already well known and strangely respected by the other fags on the site, but trouble was brewing with the head sucker of the admin's Cock - Final started to dislike In Utero and thought he was trying to dispose of him. Final got Very Upset about this and intended to stop this evil do-er for once and for all

This upset poor sensitive SOJ and he decided to complain about Final's abusive moves. Without realizing it, he had started a lollercoaster of drama, which climaxed with Final banning every fucking member that disagreed with his totalitarian ideals.

All his photos are in Black & White because he is actually Ginger

As In Utero[edit]

He came back in the August of that summer under the name In Utero, which was unfortunately named after his old Runescape account, which was in turn named after a Nirvana album.

He kept a low-ish profile, trying to find a way to undermine the asshole mods on the forum. He obtained the support of Evil Meow, a lolcat obsessed whore, just so he had some support and protection from the banhammer.

Meanwhile the baffled emos of the forums still distrusted most of the global moderators from the whole controversy earlier on in the summer. In Utero decided to use this to his advantage by manipulating the members via the chatroom, so it wouldn't be noticed by his backup, Evil Meow, who still had no idea what was going on.

After all his hard work, Final managed to gain the undying adoration of the mindless masses by posting images of Darth Vader, and finally working out In Utero's plan and banning him.

Post Pwnage[edit]

In Utero still moans and bitches about that forum to his IRL friends, but has more than given up on overturning it. He has now returned his attention to Tetris (what a Fag).

Back Again, as Viakal[edit]

After the Onision Forums fucked up again, he was able to access it, and for three days he was able to access it before getting B&. Throughout this period he succeeded in trolling the mods and members of the site via shock sites and cheese pizza.

Happy Ever After[edit]

It is probable that he will return to the Onision Forums, but its doubtful that it'll be any time in the near future.

Indecisive cunt[edit]

One second In Utero loves Anime, but the next he's real into poetry. One second he goes on about how much Mindless Self Indulgence rock and the next he's saying Slipknot is the best band ever.

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