Jack Merridew

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Jack Merridew was a prominent deletionist on Wikipedia until he was banned on March 31, 2008, when it was discovered that he had over 9,000 cockpuppets used for pushing his deletion campaign and for harassing known drama whore White Cat/Cool Cat. His oldest known account was Davenbelle, and two other major accounts of his were Diyarbakir and Moby Dick. He is also known to have two other minor accounts called D73733C8-CC80-11D0-B225-00C04FB6C2F5 and Note to Cool Cat.

Jack as photographed by his "girlfriend", presumably obtained for him by Gary Glitter

Biography[edit]

“Jack Merridew” is a pseudonym derived from some pathetic character in Lord of the Flies. His real name is David.[1]

Jack hates stuff to do with popular culture such as Dungeons & Dragons, Star Wars, and Honorverse, so he goes around vomiting tags all over their respective Wikipedia articles and tries to get them deleted. This earned him the friendship of an epic faggot and fellow deletionist known as Gavin Collins, and they are now best friends forever. This also earned him the enmity of fellow cockpuppeteer Grawp, who was known for making Jack butt-hurt for several months. Jack was also frequently raided by eBaum's World, as can be seen here.

Dramahz between Grawp and Jack

Originally, Jack Merridew’s account name was “Senang Hati,” which he used to create spam articles for the Senang Hati Foundation and Smile Foundation of Bali, two organizations in Bali that kidnap children with facial disfigurements such as cleft lips and subsequently engage in pederasty. He had the account renamed to “Jack Merridew,” and then Grawp created a new account called “Senang Hati” for the lulz, which he used to try to get Jack’s spam deleted. Grawp was unsuccessful, and the account was renamed to “Senang Hati (impersonator).” Ironically, Jack’s spam articles still exist, even though they are shit.

Jack Merridew is an English-speaking retard, most likely an Ausfag, who, after getting kicked out of his native country, moved to an island called Bali in Indonesia.[2] There, he works for the Senang Hati Foundation and Smile Foundation of Bali, where is he is paid in child slaves to use as sex toys. After being put in Bantown yet again, he is most likely being entertained by such slaves as you read this.

The Drama Continues[edit]

Mainly due to support from his deletionist buddies and sucking the cocks of various TOW admins in the Cabal, Jack Merridew was unblocked on May 2, 2008, much to the dismay of the faggot White Cat. However, he was blocked forever once again just two days later [3] after much drama-mongering. He is now confined to editing shitty little projects like the Indonesian Wikipedia and Wikimedia Commons, having his deletionist buddies spam his shitty Balinese pictures all over TOW. Jack is obsessed with drama and his edits are pretty much only on talk or bureaucracy pages. TOW is just a place to interact with people over the internet for Jack and Nothing he adds to the encyclopedia has any value.

More Drama Coming Soon[edit]

"A Leopard Doesn't Change Its Spots" ~ Jack Merridew March 16, 2010[edit]

Jack has got those admins fooled. He puts on his "I have seen the error of my ways. I've changed. I am reformed. I'm no longer an a**hole" act. Those idiots are dead from the neck up. Jack isn't bright, it's just that they are so pathetically gullible. While telling them this, Jack's subconscious leaves little turds of truth about himself on Wikipedia, like this one from his talk page (also here) where he says that he has never seen a leopard change his spots. We agree Jack, too bad the admins don't pay attention to your unchanged spots.

One day, after ignoring these little turds of truth from Jack, those admins are going to wake up too late to see that they and Wikipedia have been ass raped by Jack. Those admins better lube up as the day is coming sooner than they think.

Jack Asks To Be Made An Administrator[edit]

On March 16, 2010, ol' Jack made a request to be made an administrator. Stock up on that lubricant Wikipedia. You are going to need it. The clock is ticking.

Jack Leaves[edit]

In April 2011, soon after Jack's account was scuttled, some good ol' lulz arose. Shortly thereafter, the emergence of the user 'Barong' came, and brought moar lulz in his boat with him. And then Jack brought his ol' fucking rant-ish self to him, and ranted. [/the end]


Wiki's dispute resolution process is fucked-up dramatized with wikidrama. The whole wiki community isn't fucked-up. The problem is those who participate. At all levels, we allow the unqualified too much voice. We allow an endless revolving door of returning bad actors. Who's winning, really? The idiots, the trolls. They love it when they get the serious to turn on each other. As Jimmy said, we have been too tolerant, for too long, of toxic personalities (and no, I'm not endorsing it re Bish;). But toxic personalities are a problem. It's fatal. It's not just Grawp, Chester Markel, and the other usual prats; it's those that are inside, may have clean block logs, but are still "toxic" (cf: assholes). Some have been made "admins", some made it to higher levels, too, i.e. the old-guard.

The restrictions the AC has imposed on me for years—and intend to maintain in perpetuity—make it impossible for me to continue to effectively participate in this project. The little shits, and the big shits, target me. A clean start is not open to me ('restricted') and, as Iri confidentially pointed out to Malleus, clean starts require you to effectively create a new personality... which is effectively the same thing as socking. What a fucked-up project.

I've defiantly edited as a bunch of socks and as various IPs because the renewed restriction on me is bullshit; I'm just pissing on it. I spent years abiding by all they asked, was commended for a clean return, and then kicked in the teeth. Fuck that. If they can't bring themselves to ever resolve my case, I will. When I sought removal of the old restrictions, my intent was simply to reach the level of any user in good standing. My request that my old accounts be returned to me amounted to a desire to be made whole, again. Since they've taken all viable options off the table, I'm going to flaunt all their rules. That doesn't mean I'm a vandal, or going to speak in multiple voices in discussions ;> The edits I've made with undisclosed accounts are good and useful.

The wiki is entering a totalitarian stage. They're now making it even harder for users to return (although I believe some should never' return; Ottava, for example). No one that gets entangled with "GovCom" is ever going to emerge un-neutered. My advice is don't bother trying to abide, just move on, either to a new account, or to something else. The meta-picture is that for years the trolls and vandals have encouraged a "fight" culture and it's become ambient. Most energy now is directed at dealing with disputes of one sort or another. It's been quite peacful editing with undisclosed accounts; much like the project was back in 2004. Not terribly viable, of course. Huge numbers of The Hounds of Zaroff infest this place; it's all hunting real people to them. Target shooting, with live targets, some of whom are pilloried.

With a nod to User:RexxS/BringBackJack. — Terima kasih.

Puputan (talk) 08:34, 25 June 2011 (UTC)

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