Jesse Osborne

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Jesse Osborne
Nationality: Americunt  MiniflagUSA.png
Highscore Killed 2, injured 3
Top 50? lol no
Style Single player
An Hero? Nope

Fatass that tackled him
Him and his daddy. Notice the possession of a tactical school shooter assault bowl cut hairstyle.

Jesse Osborne is an edgy 14-year-old faggot who killed his dad and drove his pick-up truck to his local elementary school and shot 3 people before being tackled and shackled. His assault became known as the Townville Elementary School shooting (A.K.A Sandy Hook 2: Electric Boogaloo). Frankly, no one gave a fuck about his chimpout. But what they didn't realize was that poor old Jesse was possessed by THE GRINCH- I mean, ADAM LANZA,the renowned autist who shot his mom and drove to his old elementary school and shot 20 kids. Jesse Osborne was first suspected to just be re-enacting Sandy Hook until the scientists at ED found out that Adam's ghost had possessed Jesse and decided to try and add more points to his High Score.

Before Jesse was able to go for the High Score, some fucking fatass kid was lurking in the school after scoffing down a super-sized severing of McDonald's and bellyflopped on Jesse, leading to his arrest. Jesse however said that he threw his gun away and called his grandparents and cried to them on the phone before the fatass got to him. Either way, Jesse is now locked away in juvenile detention, living the thug life segregated from the internets, young wimminz, and education for special needs students. All he has left to enjoy is getting his scrawny ass buttfucked during Bubba's daily routine.

So apparently he was obsessed with Columbine, which is obviously so shocking as no one has ever copycatted Columbine before. He talked to fellow edgy teenagers on Instagram about his shitty unrealistic plans to sh0t sk0l n0w by buying an AR15 when he was only 14 or using dish soap to get the combination to his dad's gun safe "because it was glow in the dark" which would reveal his fingerprints. Makes perfect sense.

Graded Score[edit]

Graded score
Kill count: 2/20
Accuracy: 8/20 2 killed, 3 injured.
Style: 10/20 Tryhard school shooting
Butthurt: 4/20 No one really cared about this shooting. Plus school shootings are already ingrained in society.
Bonus: 16/20 Pwned his dad before setting out for the High Score
Total score: 40/100 (F)
You will never outrank Adam Lanza. However, at least you did better than Brooke Higgins and Sienna Johnson.
See full ranking

Wanted Level

Mall Cop

See also[edit]

Jesse Osborne is part of a series on High Scores
[Game OverInsert Coin]
Single Player

Aaron AlexisAdam LanzaAli David SonbolyAnders Behring BreivikAriana Grande MassacreAurora Theatre ShootingBaruch GoldsteinBreda Highschool MassacreBreitscheidplatzBrenton TarrantBruce Jeffrey PardoCapital Gazette ShootingCampo Elías DelgadoCharles BishopCharles Whitman's TumorCho Seung-HuiChris Harper-MercerDavid KatzDavid LongDan "The Twinkie Man" WhiteDeath to Traitors, Freedom for BritainDevin Patrick KelleyDmitry VinogradovDylann Storm RoofElliot RodgerFort HoodGabe ParkerGeorge SodiniJack Gilbert GrahamJames Alex FieldsJared Lee LoughnerJason DaltonJason RodriguezJaylen FrybergJeff WeiseJeffrey DahmerJesse OsborneJiverly VoongJoe StackJohn Russel HouserJosef FritzlKimveer GillKip KinkelLuby's massacreMarc LepineMark BartonMark EssexMartin BryantMatthew de GroodMichael CarnealMichael RyanMikese MorseMizhi County No. 3 Middle School AttackMr. SaariMutsuo ToiNasim AghdamNghtmrchld26Nice Truck Attack 2016Nickolas CruzOmar MateenOsama bin LadenPekka-Eric AuvinenPennsylvania School StabbingRandy StairRaoul MoatReina Nightclub MassacreRobert BalesRobert Gregory BowersRobert HawkinsRobert SteinhäuserSam HydeStephen PaddockTed BundyThomas Watt HamiltonTim KretschmerTJ LaneUnabomberVirginia Tech MassacreVladislav RoslyakovWade Michael PageZac Penton

Co-Op Mode

Boston Marathon BombingColumbineDallas Sniper AttacksJews did WTCPearl HarborSan Bernardino shootingSandniggers in ParisTimothy McVeigh


Adolf HitlerAugusto PinochetHolocaustJoseph StalinKim Il-sungMao ZedongPol PotSaddam HusseinWorld War II

Banned From Scoring

Billy MitchellTodd Rogers

Jesse Osborne is part of a series on Psychopaths
[It rubs the lotion on the skin or else it gets the hose againInflict suffering]
3g1h-phone3.jpg Spree/One-time Killers:

Aaron AlexisAbdul Razak Ali ArtanAdam LanzaAlex HribalAli David SonbolyAlyssa BustamanteAnders Behring BreivikBaruch GoldsteinBruce Jeffrey PardoCasey AnthonyCho Seung-HuiChris Harper-Mercer Daniel PetricDmitry VinogradovDylann Storm RoofElliot RodgerAmanda KnoxGeorge SodiniGerry McCannIrvin Eugene Helton JrJared Lee LoughnerJason RodriguezJeff WeiseJiverly VoongJoe StackJosef FritzlKimveer GillKip KinkelLindsay Kantha SouvannarathLogan ClarkMalik Nadal HasanMarc LepineMark EssexMartin BryantMatthew MurrayMatthew de GroodMatti SaariMaurice ClemmonsMichael CarnealMichael RyanMichael WoodmanseeMutsuo ToiPekka-Eric AuvinenRaoul MoatRobert BalesRobert HawkinsRobert SteinhäuserSebastian BosseSteve StephensTJ LaneTim KretschmerTyler PetersonTheodore "The Unabomber" KaczynskiVester Lee "Bryce Williams" Flanagan IIWade Michael PageZac Penton

Career/Serial Killers:

Charles MansonChris BenoitHitlerMao ZedongJack the RipperJames HolmesRichard "The Iceman" KuklinskiTed BundyJeffrey Dahmer


Al-QaedaDzhokar TsarnaevOmar MateenSanta ClausTamerlan TsarnaevOsama Bin LadenEric Harris and Dylan KleboldSam Hyde

See also:

Antisocial personality disorderCannibal HolocaustParanoid personality disorderSick fuckMurderJewsPolice Brutality