| BREAKING NEWS!!|
—Jussie Smollett, tweeting about Jussie Smollett
Justin Langston Mikha Smollett✡ (a.k.a. That Faggot Empire Nigger) is a 36-year-old Americunt actor and professional homosexual Jewlato who is most well known for his roles as one of the black kids in The Mighty Ducks and the black guy who dies in the shower scene in Alien: Covenant. Jussie is also, to a lesser extent, known for his role as Jamal Joseph Lyon on Fox's gay hip-hop drama, Empire – a role where he isn't actually required to do any acting as a result of actually being a gay black Jew IRL.
At around 2:00 a.m. in the early-morning hours of January 29, 2019, Jussie was walking the freezing streets of Chicago, Illinois, when he decided to be a retarded attention whore and become the victim of a horrific "hate crime" in which two crackers in ski masks allegedly asked him "Aren't you that faggot Empire nigger?", splashed bleach all over him in an attempt to turn him into one of them and then tossed a David Carradine necklace around his neck. Naturally, these mysterious assailants then informed Jussie that "This is MAGA country!" and vanished into the night like some sort of ninja-ass motherfuckers without getting caught on surveillance camera or finishing the lynching that they had started.
Unfortunately, Jussie apparently wasn't willing to finish lynching himself either and soon called the police to report the assault that totally, actually, really happened and definitely wasn't just another hoax designed to smear Trump supporters as a bunch of violent and racist homophobes. It was soon revealed that Jussie's assailants were Abimbola "Abel" Osundairo and Olabinjo "Ola" Osundairo, a pair of steroid-addicted Nigerian brothers who had previously appeared as extras on Empire and were paid a measly $3500 to cosplay as Stormfags and beat the shit out of Jussie for his sexual pleasure.
After Oingo and Boingo were arrested, Jussie quickly became the target of the police's investigation and was ultimately charged with multiple felonies for his retarded stunt. Unfortunately, all charges were ultimately dropped on March 26, 2019, after members of Jussie's family and one of Michelle Obama's former lovers from her pre-op days decided to whine to Cook County State's Attorney Kimberly M. Foxx and most likely gave her tons of money in exchange for her office dropping all of the charges against Jussie.
Jussie vs. Trump
The Threatening Letter
On or around January 18, 2019, a highly suspicious letter was sent to Empire studio and was addressed to Jussie Smollett. The envelope featured the term "MAGA" written on it for no apparent reason and handwriting that looked like it belonged to a 6-year-old retarded girl. The letter itself was a stereotypical cut and paste job featuring various letters from magazines that spelled out "SMOLLETT JUSSIE You WiLL d E BLaCK FAG" and featured a drawing of a stick figure that, when looked at closely, vaguely resembles the execution of Leo Frank.
The Alleged AttackMAGA country", only to then pour bleach all over him and then put a noose around his neck. Jussie managed to then fight the attackers off, then went to the hospital to treat his injuries. Now on the list of things that totally happened, this attack is absolutely right on the top, especially considering that:
- Jussie could totally tell it was two WHITE guys who attacked him, despite it being 2AM in the middle of a Chicago winter night and thus his attackers worse ski masks and a bunch of layered clothing as well
- frankly, white men are even more dangerous in the middle of a winter night, which meant that the fluffy, warm clothing that Jussie was wearing had no protective effect against his attack, as they managed to break one of his ribs
- bleach and a noose are things that all Trump supporters carry with them at all times, just so they can be ready to attack at a moment's notice as soon as a gay black man from the TV show Empire appear right in front of them
- the lack of surveillance video evidence of the attack and of the attackers is totally normal, despite the fact that the attack happened in a “very high density” area for surveillance cameras; this is because Trump supporters are also skilled 4chan hackers, and they managed to not only hide themselves from almost every single surveillance cameras, but they also replaced whatever videos of them that was recorded with videos of two black dudes instead
- the lack of any actual witnesses of the attack is also just as normal; it's a proven fact that while savagely beating up may be loud and easy to notice, the phrase "This is MAGA country!" has some unique properties which can actually mask out the sound of any attack... that's why Trump supporters use that phrase while committing all of their heinous hate crimes. In fact, it's unique properties also masked out some of Jussie's own memories, as he forgot to include that detail on police interviews, only remembering it the day after it happened.
- the security camera footage of Jussie's apartment which shows him NOT asking for help after having been viciously attacked is also another one of the 4chan MAGA Trump supporter hacks. Jussie absolutely asked for help, but the hackers switched that footage out for one recorded of Jussie from a previous day where he also happened to have a hangman's noose around his neck for a totally unrelated and perfectly reasonable purpose.
Anyways, this is a supreme tragedy that this happened, because this is clearly a prime example of the new realities of Trump's America. Namely, people making up bullshit stories about Trump supporters attacking them in order to generate pity and create controversy in the hopes that it somehow convinces people to get rid of Trump.
The Suspects Revealed!
Fake News or Fake Noose
After every politician in DC and every Drumpf hater in Hollywood denounced the mysterious men who gaybashed Smollett, it was discovered that he had paid the two men $3500, presumably to act out a "fagbashing turns erotic" fantasy. Unfortunately the two men lied on Jussie and claimed that his intent was to stage a fake hate crime, which is very fashionable in the current year.
The Chicago Police are currently investigating this as a hoax, the "trajectory" of the investigation having been turned around after the two fake Nigerian men in blackface lied on Smollett who dindu nuffin. The racists and race baiters had a field day on Twitter and Trump supporters were once again proven to be wild eyed racists.
- "The vicious homophobic and racist attack on Jussie Smollett shows the terrifying danger of MAGA thinking" (Archived: )
- "The Racist, Homophobic Attack on Jussie Smollett Is Far-Right America's Endgame" (Archived: )
- "Jussie Smollett’s Attack Proves Hate is Still Alive in the United States" (Archived: )
- "I'm Black and Gay. This Is Why Jussie Smollett’s Attack Hurts So Deeply" (Archived: )
- "The Jussie Smollett attack highlights the hate black gay Americans face" (Archived: ⮞ 2: File)
- "Jussie Smollett Reminds Us That Fame Doesn't Protect Queer and Trans POC" (Archived: )
- "Jussie Smollett’s Attack Is a Symptom of the Trump Era" (Archived: )
- "Far-right extremists are trying to convince people that the brutal attack on Jussie Smollett is a hoax" (Archived: )
- "Far-right extremists are claiming Jussie Smollett attack is a left-wing hoax" (Archived: )
- "Twitter search suggestions promoted right-wing smear that attack against Jussie Smollett was a hoax" (Archived: )
- "The Jussie Smollett attack is so personal for black LGBT people because we know it could have been any of us" (Archived: )
- "Is The Chicago Police Department Already Lying On Jussie Smollett?" (Archived: )
- Jussie Smollett thread on Kiwifarms.
- Jussie Smollett on Know Your Meme.
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|Featured article February 13 & 14, 2019|
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The Central Park Five
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