||Kabutolover334 is an Epic Lolcow|
And should be trolled to death in the usual fashion
||This person has Assburgers Syndrome, |
so you can't say anything bad! :-(
Be aware of that, you insensitive fuck.
Kabutolover334: Powerword Megan E. Joseph (b.February 3 1989) , first came to the attention of ED when attempting to whiteknight the epic lolcow SephirothPrincess941. Rushing to the aid of her supposed internet best friend, Kabutolover334 gave us our first glimpse into what was to come. Many lulz were had at her expense due to her godawful spelling and admittance to being semi-retarded because she has autism. When Sepphy eventually raged on her for daring to post in her signature that she loved the same animu faggot as her, most of the attention turned back to SephirothPrincess's monumental asshattery. Why a self-proclaimed Christian was hanging around a devil-worshiping Jashinist in the first place is anyone's guess. She also despises yaoi because it's icky and doesn't conform to the bible while we all know Sepphy can't get enough of the hawt boy loves!
Kabufgt fell off the radar for a while until an anonymous Tartlet commissioned a work parodying her Mary-sue dragon OC. Lulz ensued.
The infamous White-Knight Fail
You're an idiot...just our opinion
NOT A WHALE!!! and Curtain Horror Movies
The picture that started the drama
After seeing the parody work Kabutolover334 proceeded to have a shit fit, reporting the artist Stapledslut not once, not twice, but eleven times. Baaaawing that her OC shouldn't have been used without her permission (despite being a blatant re-color Spyro Mary Sue to start off with) Kabufgt then started to bitch how the creature her Sue was killing was not a whale but a "shadow blod". In her list of likes and dislikes she stated she hated "curtain horror movies" instead of "certain" since she doesn't know how to use spell check. This also resulted in a laugh fest.
She proceeded to uploaded a character reference picture of Glacia Warrior Dragon's arch nemesis on her account to show how it wasn't a whale and replied on every comment left on the parody art. Since she can't draw worth shit everyone left comments on what an awesome whale she drew which spawned it's own plz account. She began playing the internet tough guy and ignoring the attention or responding with positive replies. She joined an Anti-trolls group, creatively named The-Anti-Trolls Club and constantly tells the other members that she's reported suspected felons so don't worry!!! which is simply more proof of her ridiculously bloated USI. She truly believes herself to be the pure and virtuous champion of good who smites the evils of the internet.
Link her to pix like this
I hope to get this published
Being 22 years old and still living at home with mommy, Kabutolover334 has no life and spends her entire day on Deviantart stalking better artists than herself (namely everyone). But you better damn well not draw yaoi or she'll tell you how disgusting and wrong that is! Kabufgt will comment on every. single. damn. picture ever drawn by popular Narutard artists in their gallery. She also favorites about 1000 pictures a day. When someone thanks her for it, Kabufgt practically demands that they check out her ttly awsum gallery as well since she took the time out of her busy day to look through theirs.
She joined a DA group for OCs and bawwed when her entry wasn't accepted for being a Mary Sue and then bitched to the Mods that their journal entries on character flaws were aimed directly at her. Meanwhile her own
Group baaawleeted is nothing but a self-serving tribute to her OCXKabuto because it trooo wuv. She also has several pages of comics in which she swoops in like an avenging Mary Sue to save her precious character from the evil clutches of Orochimaru (despite the fact that it has been stated that Kabuto works for Orochimaru willingly). Kabuto beats her up and then all is forgiven with a big mushy hug. Kabutofgt then takes him to her world of badly drawn OCs...or some shit. It's one whale of a tale!
Kabufgt professes to hate politics, raging at one poll writer for talking about the BP Oil Spill on Earth Day. The following day she commented on another Tartlet's picture that touched on the same issue. She claims to ignore haters with ugly stamps all over her page and then the stamp beside it states she reports trolls. Hypocrisy much? She also blocks comments and flags them as spam so remember to screen cap! There are some inconsistencies in her gallery. Several of her older deviations appear to be mediocre or show a little improvement which leads one to wonder if
they are perhaps traced. Either that or her work has just gotten progressively shittier.
On April 21, 2011, Kabufgt was briefly on television on an Indiana news station, WSBT. Anchor Debra Daniels was doing coverage for The Little Black Dress Event, hosted by Goodwill Michiana. Being on a local crap news segment inflated her already bloated ego even more.
Like most of the Tartlet population, Kabutolover334 writes shitty fanfiction. Her magnum opus is
Glacia: Fail Dragon Baaawleeted also found here , the aforementioned Mary Sue. She also has written short stories about her and Kabuto (with her name as Meg or Kabutolover334). Her poems are visions of a deep intellectual soul as evidenced here. She is actually deluded enough to believe that one day Glacia: Warrior Dragon will be published. After more parody art was made for her (and some epic troll linked her mother to this page on Facebook) she got butthurt and decided to delete fucking everything because OMG this page is full of lies made by whackjobs.
Kabufgt made her triumphant return a month and a half after leaving. Within a week she threatened to Rage Quit again because of all the negative comments. She reached new levels of Derpitude when she created a sock puppet account of fail and tried to white-knight herself. Filled with "cussing", homophobic remarks and total USI, the sock puppet journal was littered with the same icons she's fond of and links to the same anti-troll club she used to spam. Although denying that she was the creator of the
CrapTrapper account, the journals filled with Assplurgian prove otherwise. She deleted it shortly after rather than admit to her fucktardary.
Meg spends her time on Facebook playing Farmville and other wholesome activities such as Gay Bashing. She can be found here and here letting everyone know she's straight and proud. But she's not hating on people, it's "just her opinion LOL". Like every other aspie fucktard on the planet, it's only her opinion that counts and anyone who disagrees is a troll. She has a new failbook group dedicated to her art. She's attempting to sell her wretched abortions for $5-$15 a piece. In typical Meg fashion, she's begging for moar publicity. Let's all help her out.
She's deleted everything and finally Rage Quit! Will she be back? Only time will tell...
"Why?! Why did you kill him,"said Kabuto angrily,"He was like a father, a brother, and a teacher to me."
Kabutolover334 looked down, a little nerves like, and told him, "He was using you for his own game. To rule all villages, and he never really treated you with much respect. I had to save you. You did not deserve any of that crap he gave you."
"Shut up," yelled Kabuto,"I don't want to hear anymore."
Kabuto lunged at Kabutolover334 and punched her; down she went. He then proceeded to kick her. It was a good thing Kabutolover334 was able to dodge that.
"I don't want to fight you!"
"You'll have to, you killed Orochimaru the man that was like family to me!"
"I was told to,"said Kabutolover334," Can't you see? He may have appreciated what you did, but he never appreciated who you were. Same went with his other servants."
Kabuto lunged again only with speed, and tackled Kabutolover334 to the ground. Punched her in the face and scratched her body. Before he could try to finish her off, he saw tears in her eyes. She was now frightened and in pain. Kabuto stopped and looked at her in worry and in sorrow.
"...I...I'm sorry...I didn't-"
"Its ok Kabuto." Even though Kabutolover334 was in a lot of pain.
"You didn't mean it. You've been mostly abused all your life, so you kick and hurt others to make them feel your pain you are going through. I really do understand."
"Its just that I feel so alone now that hes gone."
"Its understandable but to let you know, you are never alone. Just think of friends, your good part of your life, who you are and who you want to be." said Kabutolover334.
Kabuto put his head down, in saddness, as Kabutolover334 came up to him and put her arms around him in a hug.
Please keep in mind this story is original and is not a direct rip-off of Spyro at all:
Glacia: Warrior Dragon story
Many years ago, and many years this very day. There were six islands in the mystical world of Magerica. Each island had a verity of beings, mythical and real. There were humans, wizards, elves, trolls, cyclopes, centaurs, unicorns, horses, dogs, wolves, wear-wolves, fairies, pixies, sprites, mermaids, and so on.
Yes even dragons roam this world. One type of dragon in particular and one that protects all: The Warrior Dragon. It can be any species of dragon, It is given a sword, from the heavens, to fight its enemies and protect the world it lives in, It has to keep the peace between all, and it is required to learn all of the elements. So far all the Warrior Dragons have been males. Know one expected the next one to be a female.
"come on Glacia, we're going to be late for the ceremony!"
"I'm coming Taya, I just need to get Ryan, Todd, and Molly. There is no hurry we are meeting mom over there. Okay, now we can go."
Glacia was a red dragon, with black horns and belly, with long purple hair, and wore a gold necklace. Taya was also red with black belly and horns, and also wore a necklace. Ryan was the color blue with webbing scales all over. Todd was dark blue with silver horns and belly. Molly, the youngest, was red with pink webbing and belly, and black horns with a little necklace on too.
Glacia put Ryan and Molly on her back. Then her, Taya, and Todd flew to the skies. Both were sea-dragons and could not fly like the other three. The reason for this was because the mother was a sea-dragon and the father was a sky or land-dragon. The mothers name was Maria. The father? Know one knew where he was; He had been missing for many years. Each time Glacia asked about him, the mother would not say anything.
"I wonder who is going to get picked as Warrior Dragon?" said Todd,"Maybe it will be Slayer or Michale."
"Your kidding Todd, it will really be Blake or maybe Falcon," said Ryan.
Then Glacia joined in the conversation."Ryan, Falcon is not fifteen. You have to be fifteen to be chosen as the Warrior Dragon, do the job for twenty years, and then the sword goes back up to heaven and waits a day to choose the next dragon. I highly doubt that Falcon can protect Magerica for twenty years."
"Who do you think would get Warrior Dragon Glacia?" asked Molly.
"Well...I was thinking it could be a girl for a change. Girls are as strong as guys."
"Yeah Right," said Ryan sarcastically,"The Warrior Dragon has always been a guy and forever will be. Hey we made it, were not late."
The young dragons made it to the clearing, which is in the middle of their home-world Villiger. There was a total of six islands in Magerica and they were known as Terrigo, Villiger, Articgo, Brightisland, Magicton, and Funvill. Funvill is an amusement park island and not a home-world. There might be more islands to discover in the future, but know one really knows.
They found their mom and sat down close to her.Glacia sat between Ryan and Molly while Taya and Todd sat next to Molly. There were hundreds of many different dragons, and other creatures too, gathered for the ceremony of the Warrior Dragon. Every twenty years, a sword comes down from the heavens and it picks a male dragon. It can be any dragon and the dragon has to be the a fifteen years of age. Then that dragon uses the sword and other powers to defend all the beings of Magerica. Just like Glacia kind of mentioned.
The leader of the dragons,known as Elder Dragon, approached the center of the dragons gathered around him. Then he shouted,"Everyone that is here today! Every twenty years the sword will come down from the heavens, and choose any young male dragon to protect you all and fight off any evil being. Today is that very day!"
Thousands cheered after that small speech.
Then Elder continued,"Now lets sit back and wait for the sword to our next dragon."
Elder moved out of the way. A few minutes later, clouds came out of know where, forming a circle in the spot where Elder was standing. The clouds opened up and revealing the sword. It came down half way and a beam of light appeared, glowing on it. The light moved around looking for the right dragon. Its light pointed this way and that way, until it stopped at the section where Glacia was sitting. One dragon thought it was him. Another thought it was for him. Two dragons turned around at Glacia and saw that the light was on her.
"There must be a mistake."said a dragon.
"The Warrior Dragon is supposed to be a boy, not a girl!" yelled another.
The sword came down in front of Glacia and she grabbed it. Everyone was looking at her and none were very pleased. Maria stepped in.
"Quit your judging, there should be changes like this. Congratulations dear, you should be Warrior Dragon and you deserve it."
"Thank you mom,"said Glacia.
Everyone started arguing about all this. Some argued at Maria and some were just getting up to leave. As the others were getting ready to leave, suddenly a giant vortex appeared and came out a dragon and a wizard on it. The wizard said "Appamento!" and fire-bolts started shooting out of his hands. Everyone started screaming and running. The dragon was breathing fire and other dragons fired back at it.
"Glacia run now! Take the others and go!" Yelled Maria
The mother ran towards the dragon and wizard. Glacia grabbed everyone and ran for cover. She found a small hole under a tree and went inside with her brothers and sisters. They felt like they were in there for hours wondering and worrying. When there was no noise, Glacia stuck her head out of the hole and saw that the cost is clear. They saw that part of the land was burned, some dragons were injured, and a few other creatures were hurt too. Taya looked and realized she could not find mom. Instead, someone found them. It was their Grandpa Nortrix.
He is the father of their mom and he was a Warrior Dragon from the past times. Lets just say he was one of the best ones and his kind nature showed it.
The type of dragon he was was a chines dragon. He was a dark blue, yellow spike like , and a beard that was white as snow.
"Grandpa Nortrix." Molly, Ryan, and Todd said at the same time.
" Hi Grandpa." Glacia said. "Do you know what happened? Where are the others?"
"Don't worry everyone is fine," answered Nortrix." Some of the dragons got effected. They were turned to stone and scattered across Magerica."
"Who would do such a thing Grandpa?" said Molly.
" The evil wizard you saw was Morphor and alongside of him was the most evil dragon you will ever meet. His name is Morgan. He serves Morphor and His job is to kill the Warrior Dragon and take over this peaceful land."
"We have to do something!" Demanded Glacia.
"I wish I could help you, but I'm afraid my fighting days are over. It is now up to you as the new Warrior Dragon, to save us all. Now I ask you Glacia. Will you fight the evil that is upon us? Will you save the dragons and protect the other beings of Magerica? Finally, will you be the Warrior Dragon until your time is done?"
There was a long pause as Glacia was thinking. She then replied,"I will."
"Alright then. Let me take you young ones home. You look tired, and your training starts tomorrow Glacia," said Nortrix.
As all six dragons were taking to the skies. Nortrix then turned at Glacia and whispered to her," Congratulations young one. I wish you luck."
Being the dumb, arrogant shit that she is, Kabufgt was stupid enough to leave her real name on her DevianTart page and to leave her Failbook unprotected for all to see.
The pic her epic fanfic was posted with
Ways to troll Kabutolover334:
Keep in mind Kabutolover334 has actually faved some parody and anti-religious art, likely believing them to be the real deal. She can't wrap her head around ideas that don't conform to her own and has a bad understanding of sarcasm which means sincere-sounding comments get the most lulzy replies.
- Tell her it's a goddamn whale
- Tell her Kabuto is an awesome pokemon but Kabutops is way cooler
- Spam her page with yaoi
- Tell her Kabuto is in love with Orochimaru
- Bash Christianity on her page
- Mail her pro-gay material and bondage equipment catalogs
—Megan admitting she's retarded
Previous Quote | Next Quote
Funny how they both spell "bitch" the same way
Her stupidity knows no bounds
Ur not allowed to parody mah OC
IT'S STILL NOT A WHALE!!!
YOU MUST COMMENT AND FAVE
I love dragons before Jesus too
That better not be yaoi!!!
Not prejudice against gay people
How she is not published yet I don't know
RPing with yourself as comments...artists love that
Don't talk politics in ur journal
Too dumb to know she's being trolled
Qualified to give critique
Keep your sick fantasies to yourself
It's a private journal on a public site
Mom warned you not to do this...
especially when it collaborates with your FB page
I want a perfect man but I don't need to change
No one respects our art!!!
It was a valid question...
I wouldn't let her babysit my kid
Another sad attempt at White Knighting
Why is she allowed to drive?
It's in the bible I dunno where
I think "daddy" might also be "grandpa"
It's those damn gays' fault
Because that has to do with art
She can't understand why people hate her
Spouting memes and failing
Like OMG people online are meeeen
The gay people started it
Trying to act mature and failing
Gallery of Fail
Only $15 for this masterpiece
God's little killing machine
I accidentally the anatomy
Self-insertion at it's worst
the accompanying artist's comments
It's like staring into Hell
Must be the scanner's fault it sucks
As seen in "Planet of the Apes"
Totally Original do not steal
Kabuto is a ttly hot guy from Naruto not a pokemon
The horror of realizing your joke just became a minor meme
RapeTrap Her sock puppet DA account Baaawleeted
New DevianTart page Baaawleeted sucked admin cock to get it back Baaawleeted again
DevianTart Page Baaawleeted
Her MySpaz friends only Baaawleeted
Her FailBook Art Group Notice all members are friends/family
Failbook Page 2A second group with more of the same