Kloeri

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Aspergerbenice.gif This person has Assburgers Syndrome,
so you can't say anything bad! :-(


Be aware of that, you insensitive fuck.
 
 
im tired of you guys thinking you can ban staff when we complain about your spam
 

 

What a beautiful product of nature

If every kingdom needs a king, kloeri is king of the Land of Autism. A freenode oper and wanna-be gentoo developer, kloeri (Bryan Østergaard) spends up to 22 hours a day online, the other two reserved for self-pleasure. Bryan hates any and all actions that could be described as even mildly fun on the freenode network, and will K-line any chatter who breaks "his" rules. Because of his personality (or lack thereof), he has become a common target of freenode trolls (as well as accusations that his daddy fondled his little-kloeri), much as SlimVirgin is to Wikipedia.

It's his way or the highway, buddy: no ascii, no colors, no transsexuals, no forcing, and above all, no fun.

Have you seen this man?

Spergin[edit]

Kloeri as ansi, very accurate

If there's one thing kloeri hates more than fun, it's those who cause it, especially dongforce chatters. Kloeri has shut down numerous attempts at dongforce's peaceful merge with freenode, making a bigger jackass of himself with every jupe.

"Spam"[edit]

03:31   aggrav8d: what!?
03:31   aggrav8d: what do you want?
03:32   aggrav8d: stupid spambot.
03:32  <-- aggrav8d [[email protected]] has left #dongforce ( )
03:36  --> boxbeatsy [[email protected]] has joined #dongforce
03:37   maractus: hi
03:47  --> spammer [[email protected]] has joined #dongforce
03:47   spammer: ji
03:47   spammer: hi
03:47   spammer: any spammer here?
03:48  <-- spammer [[email protected]] has left #dongforce ( )
03:49  <-- bubblebuddy [[email protected]] has quit (K-Lined)
03:49   kloeri: since you guys won't take a hint and stop the spamming I'm closing this channel
03:49  --- kloeri sets modes [#dongforce +Pi]
03:49   maractus: whos spamming?
03:50   kloeri: you should be able to guess that on your own
03:50   maractus: look our irc is always under attack from irc.grove.bz
03:50   maractus: some dumb meta trolsl
03:50   maractus: *trolls
03:50   maractus: i think the spam can be counteracted without the closing of this channel
03:50   kloeri: and now you no longer have to worry about this channel
03:50   maractus: ok then (?)
03:51   kloeri: the real question is if your other channels should also be closed but we'll find out soon enough 
                I guess
04:04  --- kloeri has changed the topic to: This channel is closed due to spam
04:04  --- kloeri sets modes [#dongforce +t]


Mass kill (good job opers)[edit]

kloeri getting told
21:29 @kloeri: okay, you guys clearly are clearly on the wrong network as your little #wikipedia-en showed
21:29 --- kloeri sets modes [##dongforce -ooo [df]maractus [df]LadyPeanut [df]Elvis_Clay]
21:29 --- kloeri sets modes [##dongforce -oo gay_irl [df]Meepsheep]
21:29 <-- ChanServ [[email protected]] has left ##dongforce ( )
21:29  [df]Meepsheep: :0
21:29 --- kloeri sets modes [##dongforce +Pif ##you_have_got_to_be_kidding]
21:29  [df]LadyPeanut:          ..
21:29  [df]LadyPeanut:         ( '`<
21:29  [df]LadyPeanut:          )(
21:29  [df]LadyPeanut:   ( ----'  '.
21:29  [df]LadyPeanut:   (  kloeri ;
21:29  [df]LadyPeanut:    (_______,'
21:29  [df]Meepsheep:                                 
21:29  [df]Meepsheep:                                 
21:29  [df]Meepsheep:                                 
21:29  [df]Meepsheep:                                 
21:29  [df]Meepsheep:                                 
21:29  [df]Meepsheep:                                 
21:29  [df]Meepsheep:                                 
21:29 <-- [df]LadyPeanut [[email protected]] has quit (K-Lined)
21:29  [df]Meepsheep:                                 
21:29  [df]Meepsheep:                                 
21:29  [df]Meepsheep:                                 
21:29  [df]Meepsheep:                                
21:29 <-- [df]Meepsheep [[email protected]] has quit (K-Lined)
21:30 <-- [df]Elvis_Clay [[email protected]] has quit (K-Lined)


Pure rage[edit]

05:02   kloeri: no more silly games
05:02   kloeri: I'm tired of the spam related to this channel
05:02  --- kloeri sets modes [#dongforce -oo VunKruz LadyPeanut]
05:02   JimmyRustles: i haven't spammed anyone
05:02   JimmyRustles: i'm just trying to rustle some jimmies
05:02   kloeri: and I'm tired of you guys thinking you can ban staff when we complain about your spam
05:03  +Quietlyawesome94: Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word "wand" with "wang" in the 
                          first Harry Potter Book
05:03   JimmyRustles: If you pierce the eardrum, you will hear a loud pop, followed by a lifetime of silence.
05:03   Meepsheep: kloeri, y you take our ops away D:
05:03   JimmyRustles: what's the best way to get users to our channel?
05:03  +Quietlyawesome94: "He bent down and pulled his wang out of the troll's nose. It was covered in what 
                          looked like lumpy gray glue."
05:04   kloeri: if I see or hear about any more spam related to this channel I'm going to forcibly close the 
                channel and remove all of you from the network
05:04   JimmyRustles: like if we can't advertise the way we do now
05:04   JimmyRustles: wait
05:04   JimmyRustles: im not spamming anyone
05:04   JimmyRustles: you shouldn't remove me from the network
05:04   kloeri: and since Meepsheep is evading an earlier kline from today he's going away now


Kloeri is homophobic[edit]

12:14 -!- kloeri [[email protected]/staff/exherbo.kloeri] has joined ##dickgirls

12:14 -!- aoregcdu [[email protected]] has joined ##dickgirls

12:14 < kloeri> wow, another inappropriate channel in the exact same wain?

12:14 -!- Ryan_ [[email protected]] has quit [K-Lined]


Claims[edit]

  • "Freenode is not a place for wanna-be hackers to fool around on"
  • synflood.in is an inappropriate hostname and should be klined
  • ##trannies is an inappropriate channel name
  • ascii is the devil
  • gentoo is cool

Speaking at some nerd con[edit]

Dox[edit]

THIS TIME IN PROPER UNICODE

Bryan Østergaard 
Vølundsgade 31, 3. th. 
2200 København N
+(45) 33 13 78 86 


Source 1
Source 2


See also[edit]

Einsteinaspie.jpg Kloeri is part of a series on Aspies. [Back to your happy placeSperg out]

Adam LanzaAlbert EinsteinAlexander SlavrosAniMatAmber ButtrumAndy KaufmanAnthony 'A-Log' LoGattoAspies for FreedomAspierationsBaldi's BasicsBambifan101Barron TrumpBeefraveBenny_the_SnakeBenthelooneyBill9929Bill GatesBlocklandersBlueCatRioluBodyXPoliticBoris MalagurskiBram CohenBrandon SmithBrownsquirrelCansin13ChibiyimaChris-chanChris Harper-MercerCyndilovespiccoloDan CilleyDarrDarius McCollumDarviela MaravaronaDaxFlamedev-catscratchDisneyFan01DLAbaoaquDragonfandrp1zzaEdenHeroineGirlErik RibsskogErin AnthonyElectroRuffGiusep1Evan GraggFlaglerchatFlardoxGary McKinnonGoFagsGrantMGreg MazujianHannah CappsHeed My WarningHozupindahows00sInmendhamInuboy1000IronholdsJack Gilbert GrahamJared MiltonJahi/4444Jessi SlaughterJoekerJoey The AutistJohn Patrick RogersJoseph8276Kawaii KitsuneKawaiiKittee88KelseyaliciaKevin HavensKingMasterReviewKirbysloverKloeriKongzillarex619KphoriaLeafyIsHereLukas PietschLyndsay KirkhamLougaraLordelthibarLynn AnnM. ChaosManlytearsMark ZuckerbergMatthew NicholsonMariotehplumberM. ChaosMascotGuyMatthew DavisMDetector5Meta527IIMichael GimsonMinefagsMisha SilenostiMissyMix HyenaMonica PunkMutescreamMylarBalloonFanNate SpidgewoodNemo HanaNichole337Nick BravoNicky ReillyNeuroObjectcucksOlinkalexOnigojirakaijuOnyx ForepawPacificoceanasiaPMDrive1061PopcornPrince JeremyRandy StairRavenNGRobert Clark YoungROtardsRootbrianRoss LumbusRyanSammyClassicSonicFanSaturnDOSSeleryShane LeeSiriusOrionisSolidMarioSONYFANBOYStarbladeStarkiller88SteAndKelSperginTablecowTGcomixTheAmazingAtheistTheDOSFagThe Eclectic EspeonTheme Park ReviewTimboxTheMysteriousMrEnterTherealagerbonThe JuggernautThe Unknown AutobotTheVeganStudentToby J RathjenToKeNTom SersonToshTrigglypuffTylerthDragonUnikittyVarg VikerneswwwareaWeatherManKevinWeegeeisgoingtokillmWerechuWetflameWilliam "AlGore" AtchisonWilliam FreundWim CrusioWolfAdvocateWolfeedarkfangYouZS3

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Featured article September 6 & 7, 2012
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