List of Terms Referring to a Woman's Period
A woman's period is when a woman bleeds for 2 to 9 days out of her vagina and fails to die. Most women say that 'it is natural' and that every woman has them, but this is a lie concocted by evil Jezebels and is actually a sign from God that they hath sinned and are going to hell after Jesus has skull fucked them. To try and hide the shame, Jews made tampons for them so that they can carry on with their evil ways. There are two types of tampons that a woman can buy off of a street dealer in exchange for TV's and Sega Genesis's: the first, soft totem poles that are shoved into the bitch's pisshole for the lulz and can also be turned into bombs, due to the fuses coming out of the bottom of them. Type two are large white pads that are responsible for the death of Steve Irwin as they can be confused with skinned stingrays.
—Leviticus Chapter 12:1-2, GOD
—Leviticus Chapter 12:4-5, GOD
While some women would see the light and come to the light the Jesus for salvation, but some throw them in the bin for teenagers/creepy old men who have been watching too much Hellsing, for them to steal and fap over. They are in the same league as panty sniffers and should be shot on site.
Euphemisms for the period
- Arts and Crafts Week at Panty Camp.
- Bloodnegs ("Blood and Eggs")
- Red/Crimson Tide.
- The curse.
- Friend in Town.
- Akira Kurosawa was a prominent Japanese film director, film producer, and screenwriter
- The Red Painters.
- Jam Sandwich.
- Shark Week.
- Moontime—this term is only used by dirty smelly hippies
- Mouse in the House (at least 100 years old)
- On the blob.
- Premenstrual Tension
- Prostrate atop a crimson tide.
- Ragging it / on the rag /Playing Ragtime.
- Flying the flag.
- Red River/Tsunami.
- Ridin' the cotton pony.
- Surfing the crimson wave.
- That time of the month.
- The Russians are coming / The Red Army is invading.
- Visit from Aunt Flo.
- Guys' Night Out.
- Hemorrhaging filthy cooter blood out the tuna slot.
- Blowjob week.
- Chunking Out Some Strawberry Marmalade.
- Dolmio day.
- Red Ring of Death.
- (If you ask her to go swimming) "I forgot my bathing suit."
- Aunt Flow is visiting.
- Hide The Knives Week.
- Manchester United are playing at home (can be replaced by any team that plays in red).
- On the cob.
- Barber's pole.
- Got the painters in.
- Fallen to the communists.
- Closed for Maintenance.
- Excuse not to stop being a lazy bitch and make me a sandwich!
- It's "that time of the month" when "I'm not at my best" because "my vagina is bleeding."
Some women, who think they are neo-pagan Earth-mother-goddess-worshiping uber stupid hippies, have decided that periods are really cool, and the only reason other women don't think so is because they have been taken in by the "Period Disgustingness Conspiracy", a joint product of the Manocentric Maleocracy and Tampax Inc. These women call their periods "Moontime" because like the full moon, it drives everyone fucking crazy. Some of them even go so far as to paint with their menstrual blood, ensuring they will create a high-quality product sought after by art collectors such as Jeffrey Dahmer (and a strange smell for weeks to come).
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