Mana Maiden is an animu furfag pony collecting attention whore who has plagued the internets with her eye-searingly ugly artwork. She has made it her purpose in life to torture small plastic horses by turning them into monstrous piles of poorly painted pieces of crap with shit stuck to them.
Mana and DevianTART
As DevianTART is the chamber pot of the art world Mana has made her home there. In the short time that she has been a TARTlet she has pumped out enough horrid art to blind a small county in Central America. Her usual subject is a poorly executed anthros dressed like weeaboo whores. If a visitor to her gallery were able to browse through the many pages without their eyeballs exploding they could see:
- Anime panty raids
- My Little Ponies with random crap stuck to them
- Old memes
- Family portraits
- Badly drawn chibis
Like most TARTlets, Mana can not handle constructive criticism. Fortunately, since most other TARTlets barely know which end of the paintbrush is used for painting, she seldom receives any.
Teh Roommate Drama
When Fail-Maiden first graced our intertubes, she came with her sister in eye-rape art, Sarthou. The roommates continued to live together in fur-fuck bliss until Sarthou decided to disagree with Mana's oh so speshul child-rearing policy of ignoring the little fucker. Mana, in turn, disagreed with Sarthou's methods of child-rearing which involved ACTUALLY PAYING THE SPROG SOME ATTENTION. In Mana's mind discipline=abuse and he roommate was turfed.
Mana's frothing at the mouth, cuntward husband is ready to jump to her defense at the drop of a hat. He furiously masturbates whenever Mana demands, spreading his baby batter over furry avatars. At least it has stopped the fucktards from breeding. But anonymous wonders if the 'tard actually exists. Lurking shows Mana created "Neehran" way back before Laiminar showed up on her account. This leaves anon with two possibilities:
- Fucking sock puppet account
- The cunt is so pussy-whipped he was forced to take on his girlfriend's persona
Assuming that Laminar is not a figment of Mana’s imagination, his journal provides ample evidence that he is the winner that Mana deserves. His major accomplishments include obtaining a minimum wage job at a water park resort. This proves that sucking off dolphins is not a high-paying occupation. He informs his readers that it does pay more than his last job where he excelled as a shrimp masturbator. His excellence in this field is attributed to years of practice with his own microscopic cock. Ultimately, income doesn’t really matter when you are raising your family in your mother’s basement.
Mana and the My Little Pony Arena
Bolstered with the false belief that her custom ponies were appreciated by other people Mana decided to join the My Little Pony Arena. While the Arena is notorious for rainbow shitting, Mana’s attitude was as egregious as her customs and she was eventually confronted with light criticism. After stating that she was going to use a rare pony for a custom the rabid mob was let loose. The thought of a sought after MLP being turned into one of Mana’s abominations was too much for the Arena members, so they forgot about their physical ailments and unleashed the fury. The rage was at a level that could not be expressed on the Arena so Mana was linked to the Ponyland Catfights. When confronted with such disapproval Mana flounced, but like any attention whore returned in two weeks.
Now Mana’s activity on the Arena consists of her posting a thread about her latest custom, people’s eyes bleeding, a Moderator posting an obligatory compliment, Mana bumping the thread for all it’s worth, and the thread dying.
Mana and the Ponyland’s Catfight
After recovering from the initial butthurt of being called out in Catfights, Mana made an introductory post in which she half-assed apologized, referred to the members as “psychotic,” and let it be known that her Arena threads have a one disagreement limit. Then she stated that she would never visit the CF again which means she logged out and lurked until the next mention of her name.
The crowning jewel of her entrance to the Catfights is that she misspelled her own username.
It didn’t take long for her to again be brought to the attention of the Catfighters. After Aera Cura left a complement on Mana’s DA page, Mana felt the need to call Aera Cura out in her DA journal. That’s right. A compliment. Mana did finally apologize for mistaking her compliment for a non-compliment, but then hid all the comments in her journal that pointed out her douchbaggery.
After this incident Mana took a short vacation from being a complete retard. But in December Midnight_Dream was outed as a scammer by Dragonstar on the Catfights. Mana was in a trade with Midnight_Dream so she decided to enter the Catfights and attempt to be a White Knight. She failed.
Seventy pages later Midnight_Dream was again mentioned and Dragonstar recounted the earlier incident. Mana, the ever-lurker, saw herself being mentioned and jumped in by accusing Dragonstar of child abuse. Three days later she reappeared and provided the forum with a link to the “child abuse.” Of course she was completely full of shit and was thoroughly pwned. Consequently, she was told by the moderator to knock off her trolling or be banned. She then degraded into complete fucktarded troll mode and was banned.
Never missing an opportunity to be a dipshit, she returned to her DA journal and presented herself as the conquering hero of the Catfights.
It is from this clusterfuck of retardedness that massive lulz were born. As an “insult” to the CF Mana claimed to print out the forum and perform sexual acts on the papers. Her husband enjoys jacking off to the avatars of the biggest bitches. The Catfights reacts.
While the stir at the Catfights gave this attention whore a short lived buzz, the lulz quickly subsided and Mana was left in the cuntdust of the forum. Not satisfied with the length or substance of the reaction Mana made her second attempt at “revenge” by registering under a new name and trolling the board. lulz followed.
Unable to comprehend big words like “IP address” and “validate” Mana concocted the perfect cover-up for her failed trolling. Encouraged by the short burst of brain activity she spewed her story to the internets. And lo! Another cycle of lulz was born! Mana’s explanation: the Catfights trolled themselves. Adding plausibility to her story she fabricated registration rules for the Catfights. These rules include a magical list of email addresses for every person on every pony message board. She further argued that since she was banned the Catfight mods would know her email address. Because it’s totally impossible for one person to have more than one email address.
Other possible suspects include:
- Her imaginary unicorn husband
Countdown to Self-Pwnage(?)
Months of being banned from the Catfights left Mana with no means of validating her existance. With no real drama to post on her DA journal she resorted to making shit up. She presented her three watchers with a sad but completely ficticious story of another Tartlet that had been been driven away by the Catfighters.
This bullshit story did not go unoticed and anonymous acted quickly to spread the lulz. Anon made a post in the aforementioned Tartlet's comment's box assuring that when the Tartlet returned from her hiatus, she would be directed to Mana's journal, thus exposing her story.
Upon realizing that she had been exposed, Mana intially tried to play it off. However, several days of playing Internet Detective led her to believe that she had uncovered the identity of the Anon. This amazing conclusion was based off the realization that Anon and one of the Catfighters had a similar signature: the copy/paste bunny. The most common signature in the history of the internets. Way to go, Einstein!
Proving her winning existence, she accused others of trolling her, and stealing art from her that a dog wouldn't shit on. Without fail, her unicorn husband couldn't wait to toss in his opinion. It's suspected that libido has been low around the Mana trailer, calling for a congregation of harpies for horn-boy.
The journal failed to inspire people with it's brillance, and still will not explain away her bullshit story. So what does the future hold? Will her peice of fiction lead to hillarious self-pwnage? Stay tuned.
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