Manchild

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A manchild.

A manchild (see also basement dweller) is an adult male who refuses to accept the responsibilities of adulthood and chooses instead to live as if they were a young child, in other words you. It is also a known fact that 99.99% of manchildren are furries, and have hard-ons for Sonic the Hedgehog and colorful cartoon ponies. Naturally, this means that they are gigantic faggots, and invariably furfags.

This is always the result of a "serious mental handicap". As in, they are too fucking lazy and socially inept to get a job.

It is interesting to note that manchildren, as their name suggest, are always male and that there is no such thing as a 'womanchild'. This is because women are children. Indeed, the qualities that make manchildren so pathetic (childishness, naïveté, sexual inexperience) are generally considered positive, attractive qualities in women by men and because society considers it acceptable that women are allowed to be parasites that do nothing but laze around at home for the rest of their lives.


Etiology[edit]

Pampers Size 7.jpg

Children are increasingly molded by gross societal negligence, piss poor parenting practices, regressive educational requirements inferior gene pools and overzealous marketing endeavors. Largely stemming from "Generation Barney", children of the 90s were taught early on that failure was perfectly acceptable and even rewarded for it. Starting with the "No Child Left Behind" stupidity, kids were suddenly reduced to the level of the "lowest common denominator" of the classroom, given A+'s for having an "A"ttitude that was "+" positive, it insidiously became imperative to make kids as happy as possible and with as little disappointment than it was to actually educate them in any constructive, useful manner.

Kids were taught that it is "okay" to be a basement dwelling welfare leach so long as they were happy and had a good attitude about it as it's not their fault anyway. They were taught that it was "okay" to wet the bed past the age of 5, yielding an increased demand on baby diapers that were put on the market last thursday that would have been completely shameful in decades past. Fast food happy meals were likewise super sized, not because kids were actually eating more, but simply because they kept on ordering the baby meals well into their tweens and teens.

Our society has since degenerated into a form of super acceptance, to the point where failure itself is something to be celebrated and standards of acceptable behavior have downgraded to a near infantile level. Creative new medical conditions and disorders have likewise been confabulated, permitting parents to raise "unique" little disease-bags rather than real children. Mommy's little malady, daddy's little disorder, it has become literally in vogue to have a "special" child with a "special" problem, upon which any failures or generally shitty behavior can be labeled with a convenient, all encompassing excuse.

Symptoms[edit]

Another manchild.

The subject in question may exhibit many of these classic symptoms:


A typical manchild. Notice how he hates things made after the 1990s.

What manchildren like to do erryday.


Stages[edit]

Typical manchildren
  1. Fagolescence: Adults who act like teenagers
  2. Olchai: Adults who act like children.
  3. Adult babies: Adults who act like babies.

Variants[edit]

Generally there are two types of manchildren, the emotionally unstable drama whore type and the flippant, fun loving, lazy bastard type. The former make for excellent trolling due to the fact that they'll blow up over the slightest little thing, often have great difficulty controlling their emotions and are generally prone to acting out with little inhibition; most often due to lack of recognizing the potential consequences and outcomes of social situations.

More often than not they tend to float over in the aspie end of the spectrum, while the later category tend to be apathetic, carefree neurotypicals who generally don't take anything seriously...at all. Trolling or flaming that type is not recommended, they'll simply laugh it off, poke fun at you for not acting like them and due to their complete inability to take anything seriously (least of all themselves), any attempted attack or troll will fail before it has even begun.

Examples[edit]

Interest Groups and Communities[edit]

Celebrities[edit]

Internet Kooks[edit]

Gallery[edit]

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]


See also[edit]

Einsteinaspie.jpg Manchild is part of a series on Aspies. [Back to your happy placeSperg out]

Adam LanzaAlbert EinsteinAlexander SlavrosAmber ButtrumAndy KaufmanAniMatAnthony 'A-Log' LoGattoAspies for FreedomAspierationsAssburgerBaldi's BasicsBambifan101Barron TrumpBeefraveBenny_the_SnakeBenthelooneyBill9929Bill GatesBlocklandersBlueCatRioluBodyXPoliticBoris MalagurskiBram CohenBrandon SmithBrownsquirrelCansin13ChibiyimaChris-chanChris Harper-MercerCyndilovespiccoloDan CilleyDarrDarius McCollumDarviela MaravaronaDaxFlamedev-catscratchDisneyFan01DLAbaoaquDragonfandrp1zzaEdenHeroineGirlErik RibsskogErin AnthonyElectroRuffGiusep1EmpLemonEvan GraggFlaglerchatFlardoxFUNImation2002Gary McKinnonGoFagsGrantMGreg MazujianHannah CappsHeed My WarningHozupindahows00sInmendhamInuboy1000IronholdsJack Gilbert GrahamJared MiltonJahi/4444Jessi SlaughterJoekerJoey The AutistJohn Patrick RogersJoseph8276Kawaii KitsuneKawaiiKittee88KelseyaliciaKevin HavensKingMasterReviewKirbysloverKloeriKongzillarex619KphoriaLane DavisLeafyIsHereLukas PietschLyndsay KirkhamLougaraLordelthibarLynn AnnM. ChaosManlytearsMark ZuckerbergMatthew NicholsonMariotehplumberMascotGuyMatthew DavisMDetector5Meta527IIMichael GimsonMinefagsMisha SilenostiMissyMix HyenaMonica PunkMumkey JonesMutescreamMylarBalloonFanNate SpidgewoodNemo HanaNichole337Nick BravoNickolas CruzNicky ReillyNeuroObjectcucksOlinkalexOnigojirakaijuOnyx ForepawPacificoceanasiaPMDrive1061PopcornPrince JeremyRandy StairRavenNGRebelTaxiRobert Clark YoungROtardsRootbrianRoss LumbusRyanSammyClassicSonicFanSaturnDOSSeleryShane LeeSiriusOrionisSolidMarioSONYFANBOYSperginStarbladeStarkiller88SteAndKelSuperMarioLoganTablecowTGcomixTheAmazingAtheistTheDOSFagThe Eclectic EspeonTheme Park ReviewTimboxTheMysteriousMrEnterTherealagerbonThe JuggernautThe Unknown AutobotTheVeganStudentToby J RathjenToKeNTom SersonToonEGuyToshTrigglypuffTylerthDragonVailskibum94Varg VikerneswwwareaWeatherManKevinWeegeeisgoingtokillmWerechuWetflameWilliam "AlGore" AtchisonWilliam FreundWim CrusioWolfAdvocateWolfeedarkfangYouZS3

Manchild is part of a series on Dying Alone

[DeadCry yourself to sleep]

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Those Dying Alone

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