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Muff and Mike, a savage journey to the heart of postpubescent schadenfreude.[edit]

Take a pair of exhibitionist imbeciles, add hormones, cork and shake. Stand back with loud report! Postpubescent schadenfreude has its roots in GLANDS or sexual abuse or the desire for same. Glandular disturbances are also responsible for obesity despite the laws of thermodynamics. Surprise sex by relatives and transients exacerbate gender confusion when the subject is unable to find or reach its exterior genitalia and can only masturbate by riding a horse or rocking on a bowling ball.

Note the holster - Nick always carries a gun to protect himself from penis wasps.
Having a hamster extracted.

Nick, who calls himself (YouTube Favicon.png muffdaddytv), is a 20 yr old pre-alcoholic security guard with an AK47 who makes hate vids of youtube rivals, performs simulated sex with trees and their amputated limbs along with other delightfully amusing antics for a horde of tween-age basement-dwelling aspies while babbling about penises. Snakes and guns are his favorite simulacra but anything stiff and somewhat cylindrical satisfies. He reached the zenith of nanocelebrity when channel 4 covered his humiliation by the condo committee of fossilized, patchouli-drenched, purple-haired incontinent latchkey hags with a collective penis.

ROFL ROFL ROFL!!! is this a joke? do you know WHO THE FUCK I AM! YOU can not even look me in the eyes without shaking...I AM MUFFDADDY2


—Muffdaddy2, To Anonymous

Milking the trouser snake.
Exploring alternative lifestyles.

New Enterprise[edit]

Last week, Muffdaddy (aka Nicolas G Ignacio) and his sugar daddy Mike “Fat” Davis set-up a new "reptile rescue." Unlike their previous “rescue” this one isn’t a scam! View the evidence for yourself!

A message to Muffdaddy2[edit]

ROFL!!! HIPPIES LIBERAL DUCHE! its soo funny you sounds and talk and speak sooo much like Dave viscious...thats sooo weird! LOL


—Muffdaddy2, thinking Anonymous's name is Dave.

get a life fagget....i know who your what you said youre either parker of dave...what a loser...LOL



—Muffdaddy2, proving his Unwarranted_Self_Importance.

good god go slit your fucking throat and just die you piece of shit what a fucking loser everyone everyone point and laugh at this butt dart LMFAO HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRR


—Snakemannva, Muffy's lover coming to his aid.

see look i mad you famous! are you happy now DAVE? ROFL


—Muffdaddy2, thinks he made us famous.

Muffdaddy2's buttfags[edit]


Nick is the buttfag of Mike (YouTube Favicon.png snakemannva), another beast with boobs who wears makeup, nipple clamps and begs jparker (a chat forum rival with whom he is obsessed) to 'fuck me soooo hard' for the sadomasochistic entertainment of the underage crowd. Mike says he owns several profitable pr0n sites on the side. He loves children and supports the youth by providing a chat room for his young fans. Mike lives in the woods and has a big box of duct tape and vaseline and he can borrow a van with tinted windows any time he likes.

Mike secretly hates Nick and laughs at him with his other buddies (on the forums where Nick is banned for being a moron) about how much IRL money he's been able to get Nick to put into his business, The Wheel of Butthurtness which specializes in live sex toys.

  • Troll the SMBD family chatroom here: [1]
fuck...he can't even spell jparker right...

Speak No Evil!

Ha ha ha - size 9 fits!.
North American Manatee Boy Love Association SEAL OF APPROVAL.
My intrests as a hole varry inevidably.


—Ladybloodrose, Career Chat Moderator, Extreme Penis Chat

Ladybloodrose is on duty. She suckled at the tit of Judge Judy.

Rules for this chatroom:

#4. We will not tolerate some pussy threating to kill themselves in this chatroom we do not need to hear your pathetic life and noone will feel sorry for you the only suicide you will be doing will be killing your name on here because it will be flushed down the toilet and banned like the sissy coward you are noone here will let you have way because you through a sissy fit here


—Mikey, Admin, Extreme Penis Chat


  • Teh Legend
The Original Lady "bloodrose" - Goatse Girl.

This larval Girlmecha lives in the vicinity of Withering Dugs, Arizona along the highway where one finds all those signs warning that hitch-hikers are escaped inmates. She stupefies her chat room with a constant barrage of dramabombz. (Give a naked mole rat mod powers and you put the hag in haggis.)

IRL she subsists on roadkill and those milk-jugs of recycled beer the truckers abandon when they stop to stretch their legs and she forages rest stops for used condoms and other protein sources.

<Emsee> i are been band for 5 days coz ladybloodrag (AKA ladybloodrose) has enforce a rule that u are not alowd to say words like penis and fuk and vage hole and scrote and clit and fanny and nizzle and cok and dik and shit and sex and all that jazz so i sed "that are bullshit u muther fuking bitch", then she are kiked me so i are make new acounts and then she bloked my ip from sighning in for 5 days lol


  • Teh Troof

Celeste the MY.gif Bisexual Animal Abuser is a low functioning Clowns Syndrome poser who lists her occupation as Chat Admin, meaning she's over 300 lbs. and her ass has fused with the chair. She bans anyone who interrupts her Carnival of Anguish (tm) over life's unfairness. She didn't ask to be born that way. All fat people are fat cuz of GLANDS which are genetic. That means you can't blame her for it because she had nothing to do with stuffing 17 tons of organic matter per annum into that insatiable maw. Morbid obesity is actually her greatest virtue. The more she can eat, the more of the universe she takes under her control and her ambition knows no bounds.

IRL, she is an oleaginous ecosystem whose sweaty folds conceal saprophytes, arthropods and a palimpsest of tattoo blunders. She lives in the backwoods of Jawjah with snakes, practices witchcraft, the sacrifice of small furry animals and raises penis wasps. When her baby tried to strangle himself in the womb, and the putative father fled to Huntington Beach, California after their only meeting, she turned to pcp and vanilla extract to repair her damaged psyche. That was also fail because she's not an aboriginal american. She is fully stump-trained and when not servicing the relatives and livestock, she enjoys lighthearted fun, like squashing ponies or carpet bowling. Barefoot waddles in the moonlight and diesel scented bubble baths are not the key to her heart- just bring fucking food. A 20 lb. cheddar dildo will make her yours.

Poledancing for the barnyard.
She's kept here when she is fed (or when the Murray County sheriff visits).
Brokeback Bitch - staggering horsemanship, vaginal stimulation.



See Also[edit]

External Links[edit]

Other examples of Schadenfreude:

  • Masochists fighting over a stick.
  • Sadists fighting over a masochist.
  • Bindi Irwin getting raped by a stingray.
  • Iranian womens' synchronized swim team trials.
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