Muslim Dating Sites

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The Muslim dating ad you see on YouTube
I tried, those Sandniggers won't let me.
Probably shouldn't make this your avatar.
No, use this instead.

The Internet can be used for many purposes. Among these is online dating...for Muslims?! Of course, chances are your marriage has already been arranged for you, but some of us have parents who are poor, lazy, or generally worthless. So, for those unfortunate souls we have Muslim dating sites. Perhaps the best (well, only) reason to use these sites is getting to see your potential wife, or at least her eyes, before the marriage occurs. Just remember to keep all conversation business-like until the wedding night.

Of course, nobody sees the fucking point of this, considering you can't see their faces.

You never know who you are going to marry with an arranged marriage but new advances in the Internet, you now can learn more about who you would like to marry before you ever meet them.


—Single and Muslim, [1]


On the one side, we have the liberal (relative term) sites. This would include the top picture, where not only do you have two Muslims happy with each other, you have them touching skin to skin without knowing if they're married. Naturally, users of this site have a destination picked out for them.

Much funnier to us is the fundamental Muslim sites.



Welcome to the Muslim Marriage Site. This service is intended for Muslim men and single women to make acquaintance for the sole purpose of marriage and not for dating or friendship.

Islam does not allow any intimate relationship between the genders outside of marriage.


—Keep walking, whore.

That's right, dating isn't allowed. This is your opportunity to see your wife before you get married (and we're toeing the line here).

Date suggestions

Things to keep in mind

  • Have to be eighteen to make a profile, which means all the women on these sites are divorcees.
  • If you marry a widow, that fulfills your charity obligation as well as getting a wife.
  • You MUST have three goats and a Volkswagen, or the equivalent, before agreeing to the marriage. If you do not have a proper dowry, your wife will not be reserved for you.
  • Try to get a good deal. If you need to, wait until Black Friday for the Two-for-One mega sale.
  • Go for the uncut model. The cut model often comes with some unpleasant side effects due to the place of manufacture.
Very funny, guys.

Pre-Marital Sex:A Photo Love Story

See also

External links

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