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Nicholas Morency

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Nicholas "The Nixtr" Morency was a longtime Transformers fan, known for a series of waaaaacky parody fanfics and his hard right-wing political point of view. Nixtr had a long and questionable track record on USENET, including an online proposal to his girlfriend. Incomprehensibly, she said yes.

More interestingly, Morency was arrested in early 1999 for offering 1.5 million dollars to anyone who would murder an abortion doctor for him. When the FBI seized his computer, they also discovered a trove of 3½" floppy disks containing thousands of images of kiddie porn.

The Drama Unfolds[edit]

When a wiigiier posted the news of Morency's initial arrest to USENET's alt.toys.transformers, the resulting explosion of drama and comedy probably peaked when Zobovor argued that possessing pictures of children being raped doesn't necessarily mean that you SUPPORT children being raped, owning a copy of Lethal Weapon is tantamount to actually comitting murder, and that offering a bounty for the murder of another human being wasn't as bad as idly threatening to kill someone because you hated a TV show they wrote. (Note: The latter is considerably gayer than the former, however.)

The Resolution[edit]

Morency was sentenced to two and a half years in prison, and cried like a total pu55y in court. He also reportedly, upon being told that his kiddy porn was being confiscated, asked if he could still look at regular porn. However, at no point did Morency *ever* express any regret for trying to hire an assassin. Morency was released last Thursday. As a part of his settlement, Morency is not allowed to own a computer, access the internets, or play with toy robots ever again.

Whereabouts[edit]

Nick was last seen in 2008 when he was trying to show his "collection" to children at the local library and angry letters to the editor of his local newspaper, pushing his politics in impotent rage.

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Nicholas Morency
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Nicholas Morency is part of a series on Usenet. [CollapseExpand]