Nu metal

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Nu metal gig
The drummer for shitcock i mean slipknot
Nu metal fan at the age of 9

Nu metal (better described as mallcore) is some form of grungy wigger metal shit. It mixes grunge, rap and metal together with down tuned guitars. You can identify nu metal bands with these wiggers or hip hop fags trying to play metal or grunge, or metal faggots trying to play rap (It's confusing, but you and I would take this over a certain canadian fuckhead anyday).

Fashion[edit]

  • Long hair (usually dreadlocks)
  • Spiky hair
  • Blond/blue/green (usually blond) hair dye on hair that is usually real short and spiky
  • Baseball caps
  • Dreadlocks
  • Big cargo shorts
  • Extremely baggy pants that don't even fit and are big as fuck
  • ADIDAS pants with a baggy size
  • Black t-shirts with a band name spelled incorrectly
  • Black hoodies
  • Wallet chains
  • Basketball jerseys
  • Baggy clothes
  • Sweat jackets
  • Ballchain necklaces
  • Studded bracelets
  • Goatees
  • Spiky hair
  • JNCO pants

Nu metal band characteristics[edit]

  • Vocalist- Some guy who just raps, ragequits, growls or sings. Sometimes he growls and tosses a fuckin bitch fit and does growls, may or may not try hard to act angry. Usually he has either long hair or spiky hair cut short. He also wears adidas pants and uses lyrics either full of swearing to show how rebellious and badass he is or writes lyrics about how he had mean people in his childhood.
  • Guitarist- (one or two) just does bouncy hip hop rhythmed riffs and down tunes so low on his guitar with 3289427498237637564384563478564358734563487563487563454656583658346583468 strings on it. He has usually long hair often in dreads and just plays weird ass riffs full of tri-tones and sounds like he's hitting random notes while grinding on the strings.
  • Bassist - Some guy who plays hip hop wigger bass lines or weird shit and usually he has a goatee beard and a baseball cap, otherwise he'll be some guy in spiky hair or cornrows
  • Drummer- some guy usually with spiky hair and a sleeveless shirt and tattoos or a crew cut. Sometimes plays shirtless to attract homosexuals.
  • DJ(optional) - some wigger who does scratches to attract black people and hip hop fans.

Bands typically take pictures in weird rooms usually dark like they're in some prison at night otherwise they are just some light room in somebody's house. They just stand their and just act like they couldn't see the fucking camera is there like blind cripples, otherwise they have a picture of themselves acting happy and like wiggers or hip-hop gangstaz with KoRnrows or beards.

Typical nu metal song

Jonathan Davis comes out of the klozet

How to Troll Nu Metal Fans[edit]

  • Deny their bands as heavy metal
  • Call them a wigger
  • Call them millenials
  • Call Korn and Slipknot emo metal
  • Say that you hate Otep Shamaya because she's a dyke
  • Say that Otep deserved to get raped by her dad
  • Say that it was funny when Jonathan Davis got molested when he was 7
  • Say that System of a Down are terrorists
  • Say that David Draiman was a greedy money-grabbing Jew
  • Say that Wayne Static's hair makes him look like Phil Anselmo's retarded brother
  • Make fun of dead nu metal musicians like Wayne Static, Chester Bennington, Dave Williams of Drowning Pool, Matt Holt of Nothingface, and the singer from Snot
  • Say that Linkin Park's album One More Light is the band's best album and the Hybrid Theory is the band's worst album.
  • Say that Kittie suck and don't know how to play because they're all girls.
  • Say that skinny jeans are awesome and that only faggot pansies wear baggy pants.
  • Call Kid Rock a talentless hack posing as a "redneck."
  • Say that Fieldy from Korn is a fat beaner
  • Call their music "hip hop"
  • Call their music "wigger shit" for emos
  • Say that Jonathan Davis is in the closet
  • Call their bands hip-hop
  • Call Head from Korn a satanist
  • Say that "Back to School" was the only good song Deftones wrote
  • Say that 10 Years used autotune and they're full-blown pop music
  • Say that Dave Williams of Drowning Pool was a fatass
  • Talk shit about Ivan Moody
  • Call Slipknot, System of a Down, 10 Years, Chevelle, Mudvayne, Three Days Grace, and Mushroomhead crappy Mr. Bungle clones
  • Compare their bands to Li'l Wayne and Soulja Boy
  • Say that Motograter look like a bunch of juggalos
  • Call Three Days Grace a hardcore punk band
  • Call the lead singer of Chevelle a ripoff of Maynard James Keenan
  • Compare Slipknot, Hollywood Undead, Mudvayne, Mushroomhead, and Motograter to Insane Clown Posse
  • Say that Slipknot is gay
  • Say that Mudvayne is a dollar-store version of Tool
  • Say that Hybrid Theory is a pop album and that Linkin Park's new albums are either satanic black metal or brutal death metal.
  • Say that Korn's Path of Totality was their masterpiece
  • Ask them why their bands all have evil or angry/violent lyrics
  • Get the Westboro Baptist Church to protest their favorite bands
  • Protest against nu metal bands and call them satanic
  • Refer to Jonathan Davis as "HIV"
  • Trigger Otep or the lead singers of Fire From the Gods and Cane Hill respectively by yelling "Pepe" or "shadilay" or just talk about how Donald Trump is a great important role model
  • Go to a Sevendust concert and yell "nigger" at the singer Lajon
  • Ask them why Korn and Limp Bizkit can't spell
  • Call Aaron Lewis a wannabe redneck bitch
  • Say that their precious Wes Borland is overrated

Bands tagged as nu metal[edit]

Popular Nu metal bands[edit]

  • Korn - The pioneers of this shitty genre. The band are known for a vocalist who always whines about how the kids at school were mean and how he was molested by his babysitter, two guitarists who just play riffs full of random notes and sometimes make guitar noises you'd hear in a Cypress Hill/Ice Cube/etc. song, a bassist who tries (and fails miserably) at being Les Claypool, and a drummer who has a last name that looks like it's pronounced "loser". The original drummer of Korn left the band and is now a worshipper of the dark lord Donald Trump.
  • Slipknot - a band who make money just by wearing retarded masks and screaming in the microphone, trying to sound as angry as possible so that they can appeal to angry teens who get bullied at school.
  • Faith No More - their vocalist Mike Patton condemns nu metal but appears on Sepultura's Roots album on a song with Korn's Jonathan Davis. Faith No More and Mr. Bungle (another band of Mike Patton) are responsible for nu metal's existence because they influenced nu metal.
  • Linkin Park - Some sextet with a singer who just sings about how he's now able to control himself, eventually tries to write lyrics about loving the world, but initially writes lyrics to help teens who have certain issues in life or need to know how to deal with their teachers. Their singer also was a nerd in school. The lyrics and vocals and shit change once they sold out into some shitty pop rock band. Their fans consist of wiggers, jocks, preppies who like them cuz they're mainstream and also emo kids might like them.
  • Evanescence - a band with a female singer. This is a band that tries to be gothic rock/gothic metal but fails at it.
  • System of a Down - A group of 4 Armenian guys notable for having the Billboard #1 album on September 11, 2001 with an album full of supposedly terrorist lyrics. Wait? THESE GUYS AREN'T NU METAL!!! ...or are they?
  • Disturbed - the band with a Jewish vocalist who has mommy issues and makes monkey noises.
  • Staind - The band began as a nu metal/alternative metal band writing songs about becoming an hero. Then they became the same genre as bands like Creed, Nickelback, and 3 Doors Down. The band haven't created any music in a while and their singer is a now a redneck country singer who dickrides the Jewnited States of Americunts.
  • Hollywood Undead - Bunch of faggy Linkin Park ripoffs whose debut album is about a swan. Anyone up for ducks? It doesn't help that their mask wearing gimmicks are obvious Slipknot ripoffs.
  • Limp Bizkit - The Poison of nu metal. They have a guitarist with ridiculously huge ass pupils and a wigger vocalist with a gay red baseball cap. They're also more wigger than Linkin Park.
  • Kid Rock - A retarded juggalo and wannabe redneck. So much so, he became a whiny country singer and was set to be country senate at one point.
  • Sugar Ray - Pretty much the same story as Incubus, except they made even crappier music for soccer moms once they sold out after seeing their song "Fly" both become extremely mainstream and play on the radio all the time. Mark McGrath gets extremely triggered when his band is called Sugar Gay, acting like he's capable of kicking someone's ass. Call him it all you want.
  • Papa Roach - The band's singer has herpes. That's all you need to know.
  • Deftones - The ones with a beaner vocalist. They eventually sold out to hipsters. They apparently got extremely butthurt over the nu-metal label that they sold out when they released their album "White Pony" dedicated to the members' pride of being bronies. All the fans can't accept they were nu metal in the 1990s.
  • Godsmack - The band gets compared to Alice in Chains and Metallica. Though let's face it, the band is actually just a pissed off white boy bargain bin version of Metallica.
  • Mudvayne - Started off as a Slipknot clone wearing dumbass corpse paint, before they stopped that gimmick. But continued to rip off Tool, especially with their singer being a Maynard James Keenan wannabe.
  • Sevendust - The band is from Atlanta as their singer is a nigger so therefore the band suck. Your band sucks if there is a nigger in your band... you gotta lay off the KFC, watermelon, and orange sodas for a while.
  • Chevelle - They has a shuvel.
  • 10 Years - Once Deftones, once Papa Roach, once Tool... has no identity.
  • Shinedown - If Lynyrd Skynard crossed with Sevendust, Staind, and Godsmack... well then there you go.
  • Three Days Grace - One of their biggest hits is literally, "I Hate Everything About You." Moving on...
  • Breaking Benjamin - A band that went on a brief hiatus because they were sick fucks; they got back together, and they sound as shitty as they were before.
  • Five Finger Death Punch - A band trying to be all internet tough guys and trying to be based off a few Quentin Tarantino films. But wait, they're not even classified as a nu metal band what the fuck??
  • Incubus - Fronted by the faggier nu-male version of Anthony Kiedis/Mike Patton. They also randomly have a black in the band and some retard with shaggy long hair who's probably Jewish. Like Linkin Park, they eventually sold out from a gay alternative pop band into a even gayer pop band aimed at screaming teenage girls; except lead singer wasn't an hero at the end. Speaking of...
  • Static-X - A Ministry ripoff band that combines with industrial metal with nu metal. The band's vocalist Wayne Static overdosed himself years later.

Second rate Nu metal bands[edit]

  • Crazy Town - One-hit wonder band with two wiggers on vocals and 38 other members who contribute nothing. One of them was on Celebrity Rehab and they're only still together so he can afford to buy more crack.
  • Drowning Pool - a band from the redneck state of Texas. They went through 432947237497 vocalist changes.
  • Dog Fashion Disco - Completely unknown until some YouTube Poop guy made them more famous
  • Seether - Formed in South Africa by wiggers and for emofags.
  • Skindred - A nu metal band formed by a bunch of britfags. No comment here.
  • P.O.D. - A Christifag rap/nu metal group.
  • Sick Puppies - The band just got some puppies for you... d'aaaaawwwwww. But who really wants puppies when you can have kittens.
  • Kittie - And speaking of kittens... they began as a nu metal band of teenage mallgoth girls for mallgoths to fap to. On their second album, the band tried to become trve kvlt metal and started to sound like dollar-bin versions of either Pantera, Cannibal Corpse, Dying Fetus, and Lamb of God but with a little bit of clean singing, but failed to make it onto Metal Archives.
  • Mushroomhead - They got butthurt when Slipknot would look like them.
  • ill Nino - Some beaners trying to play nu-metal, nothing to see here.
  • Of Mice & Men - Began as a typical metalcore band. They then became Breaking Benjamin wannabes.
  • Taproot - Fred Durst of Limp Bizkit got pissed when they signed to another record label when Fred was gonna sign them.
  • From Ashes to New - Linkin Park ripoffs for the new era.
  • Fozzy - Fronted by a lead singer who happens to be part of the WWE. And it's hilarious given the band's namesake as he happens to have a nasally Muppet voice when attempting to sing, scream, and rage quit.
  • Saliva - Their song "Click Click Boom" is officially an Islamic terrorist anthem.
  • Sepultura - Went from being a generic thrash metal band to selling out and being nu metal. Then Max Cavalera left the band and a nigger became the band's next vocalist. They now try to make albums that will impress trve metal fans but metal elitists will still only listen to anything before the band's Chaos AD album.
  • Soulfly - After making the nu-metal tinged Sepultura album "Roots", Max Cavalera goes full mallcore and sells out completely.
  • Maximum the Hombre - A Japanese mallcore band? Fuck it, we should've nuked Japan yet again at that point. Speaking of, they were notable for the opening to Death Note, but even then they're another forgettable shit band.
  • OTEP - a band with a dyke feminazi vocalist named Otep Shamaya. Say anything positive about Donald Trump and she'll get triggered.
  • Nothingface - That one nu metal band who it's okay to like. Featuring Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde on vocals. Also, the lead singer is dead, still nobody gives a shit.
  • Slayer - At one point fans baww'd when the band turned from an extreme thrash metal band into a shitty nazi-skinhead mallcore nu metal band between the mid-90s through September 11th, 2001, and thankfully it did not last that long.
  • Damageplan - The failed mallcore band started by ex-Pantera members. Ended when a butthurt Pantera fan shot the guitarist.
  • Vanilla Ice - No really, he had a nu metal career... still nobody gave a fuck, and can we blame anyone for not liking his shit music?
  • Puddle of Mudd - Butt rock/nu metal fusion with a nasally Kurt Cobain clone on vocals. Also this guy has been arrested countless times.
  • Theory of a Deadman - Similar as above, but without a butthurt lead singer. Still means absolutely nothing because they still suck, especially as a corporate butt rock band.
  • Powerman 5000 - Fronted by Rob Zombie's brother. They sound a lot like Static-X and had some popularity in the late 1990s/early 2000s. No joke, the band is surprising decent.
  • Flyleaf - Mopey nu metal band fronted by an Amy Lee wannabe.
  • HELLYEAH - A retarded redneck mallcore supergroup continuation of Mudvayne, Nothingface, Pantera, and Damageplan.
  • Hatebreed - Retarded wannabe tough guy band with a butthurt lead singer/frontman that easily rages and gets pissed over little stupid shit. His vocals are typical tough guy vocals and the band were one time called a racist band by CNN. The band said they aren't racist.
  • Buckcherry - Typical mom music with familiar topics coming off of Adam Sandler's movies that even we can all agree that we would especially hate our parents for listening to this.
  • Alien Ant Farm - Some alt fags with a fugly singer who inexplicably got popular by making a nu metal Michael Jackson cover in 2001, before becoming washed up nobodies a few years later. You might wanna help their singer cross the border.
  • Coal Chamber - Just some nu metal band with 3 goth guys and a goth whore and their singer is some guy with long dreadlocks and shitloads of piercings and looks like a pedo-clown. One of the members looks like a monkey and has big ass ears. Their video for Loco is just them playing in some mansion at night with some pedophile driving an ice cream truck there and going in to molest random people.
  • Trapt - Technically more of a butt-rock/bro-rock band, although they get labelled as nu metal since they're angsty rich kids from California like Linkin Park.
  • Cane Hill - Named after a failed black candidate for the 2012 Elections and is also a discount Marilyn Manson and Tool; fronted by a soyboy.
  • Cold - A local dive bar version of Staind, complete with a depressed bald singer doing whiny acoustic songs.
  • Flaw - a band that sounds like Tool, Sevendust, Mudvayne, Chevelle, Drowning Pool, Korn, and Disturbed all combined together. Their singer is now a cuckservative who posts about politics constantly on Facebook about how he loves Jewnited States of Americunts, police, and the American military. He opposes ANTIFA and Black Lives Matter. He is one of the "all lives matter" type of people, yet ironically is a "blue lives matter" person. Nonetheless, niggers don't matter anyways.
  • Lostprophets - Weeaboo britfags with a pedophile vocalist who sold out and suddenly went from being nu metal wiggers to being emos.
  • Machine Head - Pantera clone who sold out and went mallcore before switching back to being a Pantera clone. The singer copied Korn's Jonathan Davis by bitching about getting inappropriately touched by some mean relative in every song.
  • Islander - A much more boring, less rap-influenced version of P.O.D.
  • Fire from the Gods - Some cuckfag nu metal band fronted by some nigger who yells at Donald Trump for no reason cause "lol edge."
  • Nonpoint - Their songs managed to appear in two shitty SmackDown vs. Raw games.
  • Dope - They have a song called "Die Motherfucker Die". Obviously the band are just trying to appeal to retarded goth teens and retarded who think they're rebellious for listening to music with bad words.
  • Fear Factory - When the band turned from industrial blackened death metal to full-blown mallcore nu metal, people bitched that they sold out. I guess it's a given...
  • 311 - They fucking suck!

Third rate Nu metal bands[edit]

  • Emmure - They are BR00T4L DEATHCORE with mallcore influences
  • 4Lyn - A rapcore Deftones wannabe from Germany
  • Sunk Loto - A rapcore Deftones wannabe from Australia
  • Primer 55 - WATCH THESE FUCKERS JUMP WHEN I GET LOOSE. That was their one obligatory heavy "hit" song. They also seem to have a nigger in the band like Sevendust and Incubus.
  • Glassjaw - Emo Deftones clone.
  • Spineshank - Industrial-tinged mallcore.
  • Bigdumbface - The "lol so randumb xd" side project of Limp Bizkit's Wes Borland.
  • Chimaira - They started out as a s00per heavy mallcore band before turning into a shitty Pantera clone and metalcore band with Trve metal cred.
  • Hobostank - An awful butt-rock clone of Incubus, who are already an unoriginal watered-down Faith No More rip off. Also, this band's name gives away all you need to know about their songs. However the lead singer's current claim to fame is his solo singing work for a recent Sonic game.
  • Snot - Crappy wannabe punk band that nobody really cared about until the "singer" died.
  • Dry Cell - They ragequited when people told them they sounded exactly like Linkin Park. BREAKING NEWS: The former singer of this is now fronting Stone Temple Pilots. He will eventually become an hero like Chester Bennington and Scott Weiland, and will be replaced by another suicidal nu metal singer from the early 2000s.
  • Earshot - Another Walmart dollar-brand version of either Staind, Papa Roach, and Tool.
  • 40 Below Summer - Dude, what the fuck are ya saying??? THEH NAH NAH NAHSKA BRR RAKA MANA MANA!
  • Mass Hysteria - The band's name is false.
  • Raging Speedhorn - This band wants to be shocking and explicit. It isn't.
  • Karnivool - lol, he spelled 'carnival' wrong!111`
  • American Head Charge - An anti-American nu metal band from 2001 whose gimmick wore off as soon as 9/11 happened.
  • 36 Crazyfists - They mix nu metal with metalcore. Yes, it's as bad as it sounds.
  • Demon Hunter - Christfags who are the same as 36 Crazyfists until they change into some Pantera wannabe band.
  • Vanilla Ice - The original wigger himself decided to copy Limp Bizkit on a few albums
  • The Apex Theory - A failed System of a Down clone formed by one of the members of said band. Broke up after fans were butthurt with the name changing to some mountain.
  • Kill II This - Some pissed off band that blends mallcore, death metal, black metal, grindcore, nigger rap, opera, ripping off Tool, Papa Roach, Fear Factory, and Slayer and an extreme amount of rage quitting; all from a butthurt juggalo edgelord of a lead singer with bipolar depression and high anxiety.
  • Orgy - Their name is Orgy since that's what the members do to each other on a weekly basis. Also one of the members has no eyebrows.
  • Hacktivist - A nu metal band whose lead singer thinks he's been browsing through 4chan; when in reality, it was reddit.
  • Issues - Their name is based off of First World Problems.
  • Depswa - A fuck all cringy emo mallcore band with a horribly sold debut album no one gave a shit about. Not even their dogs.
  • AqMe - A french mallcore band named after some Q&A panels the band failed to go to.
  • (Hed) PE - Some lame ass wiggers/beaners with a really retarded name and annoying singer. After nu metal's popularity ended they reinvented themselves as juggalos.
  • Adema - The worst elements of Korn and Linkin Park combined into one steaming pile of shit for teenage girls. And one of their singers is related to Korn's Jonathan Davis, that was the only claim to fame they ever had.
  • Reveille - How Rage Against the Machine sounds when you add mallcore guitars and put no communist lyrics.
  • Pleymo - Sissy French wiggers/weeaboos who think they're cool for playing shitty nu metal.
  • Dry Kill Logic - Literally the exact same story as Chimaira.
  • Linea 77 - Boring Italian nu metal band. The only thing more dated than their music is the PS1 graphics they used for their album artwork.

Fiftieth rate Nu metal bands[edit]

  • Motograter - A bunch of retarded juggalos/Mushroomhead wannabes who thankfully faded into obscurity. Their singer is an internet tough guy and they all try to look like monsters.
  • Exilia - An Italian mafia gang mallcore wigger band that no one has ever heard of cause they're actually a bunch of drugged out cockroaches with the same shitty ass guitar riffs and whiny lyrics.
  • 38th Parallel - A politically correct emo nu metal band plagiarizing Deftones an Tool; and trying to be as political with their own Disturbed/Rage-esque message about Kim Jong-Il and other stories about what happened in Korea.
  • 3rd Strike - They were fronted by a fat bald guy who used to be a gang member. Then he died years later and no one cared.
  • Relative Ash - On their album cover they look like some prog band, but they're actually just another really obscure Deftones clone.
  • TRUSTcompany - Nu metal from Alabama. Avoid.
  • Skrape - This band is so generic there is literally nothing to comment about other than how they misspell their name like retards.
  • Sev - Remembered less for their music, and more for a Pepsi commercial.
  • Sw1tched - More wiggers who can't spell properly. Yawn, next please.
  • Lifer - The craptastic proto-Breaking Benjamin band that does shitty Sevendust rip off songs instead of butt-rock ballads. They have an xtreme blonde spiky haired singer who looks like Chester Bennington's cousin or something.
  • My Ruin - Was only famous in that one Nicolas Cage film no one gave a shit about. Oddly enough, neither did anybody gave two shits about this band years later.
  • Shuvel - Some crappy internet tough guy wiggers.
  • V-Shaped Mind - Was there promoted by two bands nobody cared about. Shortly afterwards; they fell into obscurity for being talentless.
  • Ünloco - Motörhead they are not.
  • Factory 81 - The band that makes Deftones look tough.
  • 40 Grit - Like Machine Head, but even more mallcore.
  • Element Eighty - Oh look, another generic band who like to put random numbers in their name.
  • Project 86 - ^
  • Slaves on Dope - The shittier and more wigger/TUFF GUY version of Korn
  • Backwordz - A shitty ass internet tough guy rage quitting Libertarian nu metal band that even their demographic thinks this band is bad and they should feel bad.
  • Darwin's Waiting Room - Linkin Park clone from Miami.
  • No One - Their name explains everything.
  • From Zero - Another generic d-list nu metal band, with one of the worst senses in fashion you'll ever see.
  • Downthesun - Five fat guys playing fat nu metal music.
  • Stereomud - Long forgotten Sevendust clone with a white singer instead of a nigger.
  • Grade 8 - so generic..can't conjure..will to make comment...
  • Endo - Worst. Band! EVER!

Nu metal lyrics[edit]

Nu metal is known for having very deep and insightful lyrics. Here's a few examples -


Motograter's "Suffocate":

Fuck yourself, don't get it talked up

Got no qualms with taking your life

Fuck yourself, don't get it twisted

Dig yourself a formal good-bye

Kill yourself, and that's how you die


Korn's "Right Now":

Right now I can't control myself I fucking hate you

You open your mouth again I swear I'm gonna break it You open your mouth again, My God I cannot take it

Shut up, shut up, shut up I'll Fuck you up

Shut up, shut up, shut up I'll Fuck you up

History[edit]

Nu metal was said to be invented by some alternative wankers called Faith No More and their wigger singer Mike Patton, but actually was made by Korn. Then it went popular faster than a fag on redbull getting sodomized by a monkey in Alasska naked. Then more bands came. Now it isn't popular and everyone forgot about it. To revive nu metal, form your band and bring back the late 90s and early 2000s. Also fuck this metal genre.

Tips for starting your own nu metal band[edit]

  • Put a random number in your band's name (like Factory 81, Apartment 26, 36 Crazyfists, 40 Below Summer, Powerman 5000, Primer 55 etc.) or use a band name with one or two words and spell either one of or both of the words incorrectly on purpose.
  • Have some gimmick like masks, a nigger, a wetback, or a female as one of your bandmates.
  • Cite Tool, Faith No More, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Pantera, Primus, and Metallica as your main influences.
  • Make sure at least one member has dreadlocks.
  • Create lazy power chord work.

See Also[edit]

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