Officer Ricky

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Rick Ross, wut a faggot lol.

Rick Ross, also known as Officer Ricky is a rapper who is internationally known everywhere in the world and has sold upwards of 13 million copies of his albums. He is known to be retarded, fat and also claims to be the BEST RAPPER EVAR and the BOSS, which everybody knows as a lie because rappers have no skill. He also claims to be a monkey as he keeps saying MONKEY! to anybody and just about everybody; hell, he is even worse than Soulja Boy, the world's worst rapper.

History[edit]

Early Life[edit]

Officer Ricky as a child, look how rich and spoiled he is.
Looking at this image can give you nightmares for life.
Officer Ricky during his gay sex years.

Officer Ricky was born in the ghetto part of Miami, the hardest place anyone has ever seen. From the start, Officer Ricky lived a hard knock life, you know it's hard when his parents are lawyers who have assloads of money and lived in a fucking mansion. Officer Ricky had it hard from the beginning. he was forced to work to get up the chart and by work I mean take advantage of his rich ass parents. Officer Ricky was really lazy and spent his time playing video games, watching TV and eating candy and high cholesterol foods, just like the spoiled bitch he is. He had a hard time fitting in at school. Not because he was different but because he never had any friends, even today. Ever since birth, he knew he wanted to be a rapper, but nobody would take him seriously. None thought he could do it because rich trash like him cannot rap or be gangsta, everybody laughed at him and he was even ridiculed at school where everybody called him a black person, which he would not take seriously because he was unaware of the ridicule. He thought he was getting praised.

His teenage years were no different either, he received the same ridicule all through high school, though he would also get his ass beat up and in addition would gain over 9000 pounds. During this time he competed in rap battles which HE ALWAYS WON, because he bribed the judges with a huge cash offer because deep down, he know he can't rap or do anything for shit. After he "dropped out of high school because he was too stupid to graduate", he got a job as a correctional officer... A C.O.?!?!? HOW STUPID IS THIS FUCKING GUY, I MEAN HE'S A RAPPER, HOW COULD HE BE THE FEDS, NO SNITCHING MY ASS. This would be the best times of his life as he would have sex with many, many men in the correctional center where he worked at but retired after he saw that snitching wasn't cool and had kept the C.O. thing a secret... Well until much later in his career.

First batch of shit[edit]

In order to get noticed, he had to adapt a rap persona. Unfortunately he could not think of a rap persona of his own because he could not think at all because he was as dumb as a brick. So he looked at people who were incarcerated and saw the name of Freeway "Ricky Ross", who was imprisoned for drug dealing, not for being a fat ass nigger who couldn't get laid. Since he is in jail where he can't do shit about anything, Officer Ricky decided to take his name for his own, and henceforth he became known as Rick Ross, internationally known and notorious drug dealer and rapper. He got signed after he auditioned for DJ Faggot, a hispanic black person who doesn't know shit about anything. And went on to lease a Maybach and a Escalade, cause in his world leasing is for real niggers and buying is for faggots, not the other way around.

<video type="youtube" id="RNuC9KyyVP4" width="480" height="360" desc="How Officer Ricky got his record deal." frame="true" position="center"/>

He released his debut album "The Real Miami" in 2006. The album talks about his life as a "drug dealer", dealing cocaine and running away from the feds, when in actuality the events happened in his childhood when he played "Gangsta" as a kid all by himself and a later moment in his teens when he bought sugar that he believed was "cocaine", which contributed to his weight gain. The album sounded like generic southern shit that only faggots would listen to. The only hit song from the album "Everyday I'm Hustlin'" went on to be a world famous meme. The album would be a major success, selling no copies at all and not charting on any of the Billboard charts. He would end up in debt but for him, this was a success and launched him into the spotlight, all thanks to the people without ears at Deaf Jam.

His second album, "Grilla" would be worse then his first. During this period, he would become obsessed with his Maybach as he included it in every photo he took and every song he wrote. Hell he even claimed to introduce the "Maybach" to hip-hop, despite it being introduced way before he was born. Grilla would contain pitiful attempts to create hits such as "The Boss" where he just raps about how great he is, despite there being 9000 songs about the same thing. He attempts to introduce a "soul" sound to his album to disastrous results, as he fucks up every beat on the album by "rapping" on it, as all black people do. It sold even less then his first album, seeing as how it's impossible since his first album didn't sell but he did get in a lot of debt for sucking so much ass.

Death[edit]

Mmmmmmmmmmmm.... Donuts
You know which guy he's going to fuck next.

When he announced he was working on his 3rd studio album, somebody at the Smoking Gun had enough and decided to reveal his past and hopefully destory his career. He did interviews saying it was not him, but we all know he's lying because he's sweating and eating about 9000 buckets of KFC. Despite proof otherwise, he says that it was not him and says that Photoshop did this. The news got out into the wild and risking his career (as if he ain't lost one already), he succumbs to peer pressure and finally reveals that it was him in the photos which was supposed to destroy his credibility. After that incident he decided to stop rapping and get somebody to write his raps for him, as if he's going to be a better rapper for it. <video type="youtube" id="f1hoealzD8w" width="480" height="360" desc="His confession on tape, lulz" frame="true" position="center"/>

Later he decided to diss 50 Cent under the pretense that he looked at him funny when nothing of the sort happened. He would not know what he was in for as his slightly improved lyricism was no match for their IRL tactics of ruining him. He fought back as hard a he could, by ripping off other verses from rappers and saying that they're gay but in the end, fell to funny cartoons and sex videos. Faggot. His third album was deeply anticipated, just like all the other letdown albums released this year. And when he released it, everybody was let down; everybody thought this was just an attempt to recover from his tailspin as he only sang about girls; as if he were trying to make up for the fact that he only had sex with guys. And the press, well they gave the album praise SERIOUSLY, 4 STARS ON ALL MUSIC GUIDE, SERIOUSLY WHAT WERE THEY THINKING!!! I SWEAR THEY LOVE SUCKING ON THE JONAS BROTHERS DICK!!!, but it sold below expectations therefore making it a flop like 50 Cent predicted. But this doesn't mean the end for Officer Ricky, in fact he had about 5 more fucking albums coming out, 5. His next solo album, "Officer on Duty" will be released in 2010 to near unanimous hate. Unfortunately, there is no way to kill him because he is too stupid to die, only a bullet in the head or dick could kill him.

Style[edit]

lol, look at the BAWSE eat dat donut.
If this is controversy then you sir are an idiot.
The "official" group image of the Carol City Cartel, srsly.
Officer Ricky in "Kindergarten Cop. Coming soon to teh internets.
Officer Ricky Ridin'

lol his style is shit ass fuck shit, he raps about unrelated subjects and lacks any skill or credibility whatsoever. He also talks like he's a retarded guy or something, saying something about hustle and ho's and something else I can't decipher and every time he loses or hears something bad, he sweats like hell and mumbles something that we can never understand. He's trying to be the next "Notorious B.I.G.", but he sucks too much to be the next B.I.G.. Besides B.I.G. sucks dick anyway.

Feuds[edit]

Every feud he has ever been in, he lost because he has no pure skill. 50 killed him, Lloyd Banks killed him, hell even he killed himself. He can't fight for shit, if a guy came up to him and challanged him to fight, he would lose right here and now.

Feud with Eminem[edit]

Which never happened. Ricky tried to start a beef with Eminem because he was "bored" with 50, not knowing how raped and horribly humiliated he will be, as if he wasn't humiliated already when he said he wanted to work with him, then he wanted beef with him. He tried many pitiful attempts to start beef, such as calling him a Honky near a fucking pool where luckily the wind blocks out every word he says, yet Eminem wisely not responded. After that, he decided he has no beef with Eminem and now wants to work with him again. I'd doubt he'd work with him after he called him Honky, Officer Ricky like a faggot version of Stan.

Controversy[edit]

What controversy? All he's gotten is a lawsuit for wearing counterfeit Louis Vuitton sunglasses, even that is lame.

"Triple C's"[edit]

His "gang" that he's a part in. The group contains rappers who I won't give a shit mentioning, especially Gunplay, who sucks so much pussy ass. All the rappers have no skill; just like Officer Ricky, lived too in the "ghetto" (you know, grew up rich, lived in mansions) and are extremely gay and have sex with each other at various times. They used to be called the Carol City Cartel but had to change their name after Officer Ricky wasn't connected with the actual Carol City Cartel, therefore decreasing their street credibility as if they didn't have any already. The only thing they are able to do is make people hungry for food. They were never tough, even from the beginning, hell Gunplay gets knocked out, then tries to act tough, faggot.

"Maybach Music Group"[edit]

After he decided he wanted more money, he decided to start his own label "Maybach Music Group" which somebody chanted on as "original" despite the fact that Vanity Labels existed way before then. Fucking faggot nigger. All the artists on his label suck, all the albums released on the label instantly flop and they are instantly awaiting a lawsuit by Daimler AG.

Robbery[edit]

Rick in jail at that moment.

BREAKING NEWS!!! Officer Ricky just got robbed by 3 Groupies. 3 FUCKING GROUPIES!!! OMG. Apparently they were gutsy enough to steal $60,000 fucking dollars of his "material possessions" and make a clean getaway. But Officer Ricky, being the faggot that he is, has called the feds to investigate the stealing of his stuff. We expect the girls to be captured and raped by Officer Ricky himself.

Praise[edit]

What praise, the only praise he's gotten is on comments, reviews and videos, all of which say they hate them. Trust me, nobody likes Officer Ricky. Don't belive me? Here are some quotes.


   
 
"ive heard of black on black racism but never black on black racial…is ricky fucking autistic?"
 

 
 

purpledrank

   
 
"why didn't this asshole block the wind with his big-ass body and beard?? fuck him,, monkeys? why the fuck he talking about monkeys all the time?? he in luv with them apes?? fucking stupid assholebitch
 

 
 

Michaelh04

   
 
rick ross is a wanna be suge knight HAAAAAAAA AND LOOK HE AINT SELL SHIT
 

 
 

conkilla89

   
 
he really thinks that he iz the shit... ha ha thiz shit iz pretty funny "Teflon Don" do u kno how old that sang iz , Rick Ross???
 

 
 

rapfan1991

   
 
i FUKIN HATWE RICK ROSS HES GARBAGE EMINEM ALL THE WAY AND $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$50
 

 
 

Cmurdah

   
 
hes a lame he just want some attention man hes trash now he use 2 b hot em should just go at em now fuck ricky n dat aint album of da year he only had a couple songs on it n dat album wit birdman would b trash bcuz neither one of dem could rap 4 real but ross use 2 b dat bitch
 

 
 

jockin yung treez

   
 
go getem ross show these hatezzzzzzzz
 

 
 

idiot

   
 
how can u call yourself the teflon don when u were a correctional officer and never sold drugs him and 50 are the fakest rappers eva
 

 
 

BlackWallStreetJuggalo

   
 
Rick Ross....I mean William Roberts is full of shit!
 

 
 

ogd

Relationship with Tia[edit]

She hot, but she ain't got tits so she needs to GTFO.

Nobody cares about his relationship with Tia. Basically their relationship were going steady until something happened that broke them off, a sex tape was released and Tia wrote a book about it. BORING!!! Where's anonymous to spice thing's up?

Suspicion[edit]

HE IS KILLING MUSIC, OMG!?!?!?!? Yeah, despite what everyone says, he's killing music by still being recognize even though he's been exposed as a fraud, a fake, and a fucking no-talent. Same goes to those American Idol winners, those guys have no talent, but they still being recognized. This may not matter to you, but what would happen is metal bands lost their talent, what would happen if everybody lost their talent. Music would suck, TV would suck, art would suck. Hell everything would suck, just like it is now. So... Why bother? In closing, Officer Ricky...

SHUT THE FUCK UP NIGGER!!!

See Also[edit]

External Links[edit]

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