Olene, aka Maya, lpb, hyphen, ampersand, xiara, Dot Sokol, Spike, Alexis, Halli, and mmg is an attention-whore (allegedly a pseudonym for multiple chatters) who has been successfully causing loads of drama and trolling many individuals and communities on various IRC networks and AOL Instant Messenger since mid-2003.
Olene has been a regular in many IRC channels on various networks, such as EFnet, DALnet, EsperNet, PSIGenix (formerly Xelium), and Freenode. She takes great pride in the various pet projects she works on, most of which have been IRC daemons written in Visual Basic.NET and shitty Flash cartoons about the drama she creates. Quite a useful set of skills she possesses, to be sure.
The most notable thing about Olene is the fact that she is a "very sexually open person," often engaging in cyber sex with people she barely knows, sometimes even multiple people at the same time in bizarre e-orgies of sorts. It is widely believed that this is the only form of sexual contact that she has ever obtained. She often would join a new network and "sex up" the staff with the goal of receiving privileges on the network. This was some sort of hobby for her, and while often successful, her antics typically earned her an intimate encounter with the banhammer.
She attempted several times to create her own IRC server. It makes sense, when you think about it—the only stroking she had to do to gain favor in her personal utopian IRC world was that of her own ego, which was certainly a refreshing change of pace for her from all of the cock stroking she'd been doing on proper IRC networks. Her tactic to populate these servers basically consisted of mass inviting everyone she had ever talked to online (including those who had banned her on other servers) with claims that she needed to test her very important IRC daemons. She'd lure oversexed nerds in with promises of cybersex, and she'd lure asexual nerds in by making them believe they were helping shape the future of IRC. Each experiment would only last a day or so before being closed down due to lack of interest by all parties involved.
Olene is known for causing major drama everywhere she goes, ranging from soliciting pity due to the events of her family, to threatening suicide when banned or stripped of very important IRC privileges. A simple search through her own log files revealed 41 such suicide threats. While Olene has become a part of many Internet communities over the years, after her eventual departure she is remembered as little more than a footnote, an inside joke to those who were there at the time. However, in her view she feels that those privileged enough to have been exposed to her majesty have been forever changed, but not necessarily for the better:
—Olene's take on her very important Internetting
Because of how Olene loves herself so very much (include your own joke about self-love here) she has several times decided that she needs to set the record straight and tell people the truth behind who she is and what she does. Even before coming out and telling people that Olene might actually be three people behind one face, she edited her ED article several times, unsatisfied with prior revisions. After her images were blanked out by the mysterious X64 (wonder who that could be?) citing bogus "copyright infringement," Olene then went on to edit the article herself, making sure no one thought she was a whore IRL, because "contrary to her high profile online lovelife[sic] she only has actually had sex with a dozen or so different guys." Apparently a few people were keeping an eye on her little vanity page, and the page was revised accordingly to reflect Olene more accurately. This didn't stop her from trying to remove her pictures again.
In 2005, after goading the administration of irc.mzima.net (an EFnet server) into giving her operator access, several other network operators expressed major dissent of the decision in operwall. This culminated with the mzima staff dropping a major drama bomb on her by removing her access, lest they be forced to leave the network. Suffering from a nasty case of butthurt, Olene ran away bawwwwwing from EFnet and took refuge in a small furry network known as EsperNet, where she joined the #lemonade channel. After cybering with half the membership and annoying the hell out of the operators there she was eventually permabanned yet again.
The history of Olene according to Olene
This is where things start to get sketchy and boring.
After Olene disappeared from the Internet, a person calling herself 'alexis' started instant messaging individuals who had known Olene. Possessing the same exact writing style and general persona of Olene but claiming to have no idea who this Olene character was, she attempted to get back into the circles of the Internet Olene had been banished from before. While some were able to give her the benefit of the doubt, most didn't want to put up with the same bullshit, ignoring her after a couple lines. For those that did start talking to her again, it wasn't long before she started displaying the exact same sort of personality quirks and interests as the original Olene. Over time, she admitted to knowing who Olene was, but denied being the girl, saying that she was a "friend of a cousin," then claiming she was her actual cousin. The explanation she gave for having all the logs, buddy lists, and files Olene created was that she had tried to fix Olene's computer one day, and kept her hard drive afterwards. Makes perfect sense to me.
This explanation only went so far, and all those involved who still gave half a shit generally agreed there was no difference, and that Alexis was in fact Olene, and was trying to win back whatever love on the Internet she thought she had.
In 2008, she felt it would be a great idea to set the record straight (again) and drastically revise the Olene article (again), giving people a new perspective on everything (even though they never asked for it). Since no one cares about or trusts anything she has to say about herself, someone blanked the article to give it a kick in the pants. And failed. Horribly. It was quickly reverted back because she made a fuss of it all and because she is so very important to be chronicled.
Here are some excerpts of her perplexingly self-indulgent, perhaps fictional autobiography that she tried to pass off as an ED article.
—Olene's backstory, taken from earlier edits of this article by Olene herself
You'll notice, this is all written in the past tense with borderline obsessive attention to inane details. At this point, Olene is claiming that "Olene" is some sort of fictionalized persona, made up of three separate people. Confusing? Sure. Bullshit? Probably. Interesting? Of course not. She goes on to describe the supposed trinity in even more exhaustive detail:
—The many faces of Olene according to Olene. Or I guess Spike. Or whoever-the-fuck, who cares?
In the end, there is actually very little known for certain about Olene. Because of her notorious track record of lying about everything, it is impossible to be sure if there are really three different people, or if Olene is just an individual who wants to fuck around with people because she/he/it has nothing better to do.
In spite of how pathetic and weird and slutty she is, it is undeniable that she has been incredibly effective at bringing out the worst in people and exposing sex-starved shy nerds as the raging perverts they really are.
tl;dr olene's a whore lol
Olene reveals herself to be a guy
This gallery represents at least two different people Olene has pretended to be. Chances are good she's actually a 65-year-old 400 lb. bearded man.
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