Pain (Physical)

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
(Redirected from Pain Olympics)
Jump to: navigation, search
The only pain a man needs to know. Trust us, you will know it sooner or later if you haven't already felt it.
If you're a weeaboo and wearing skinny jeans, your dick is starting to hurt right now.

Pain (Physical) or Physical Pain is that wonderful sensation YOU get when a girl kicks you in the balls to politely tell you to go away if you're a 16 year old boy or a pedophile. Women can even get in on the fun, for them it's that wonderful sensation girls lovingly call a tit hit when a woman's best friend punches her square in the nipple because she got caught sucking off her boyfriend. In the worst case scenario, the tit hit will be followed by a cunt punt, lots of scratching, biting and a bottle broken over the head to knock the slut out, followed by 2 or 3 kicks to the teeth where the cheated on girl will tell her ex-boyfriend that he can stick his dick in that ratty mouth all he wants now.
It should be said that there is no such thing as emotional pain. Real men and real women feel no such things. If what you are feeling right now cannot be resolved by punching someone as hard as you can in the face or by delicious drugs and alcohol, you're some kind of freak that needs to find a Psychiatrist and have them bury away those things you call feelings with mega doses of Zoloft and Prozac because you are absolutely right in that no one knows or understands (or will ever know or understand) what you are feeling.

What Causes It[edit]

The Hero's journey defined by Joseph Campbell.

Some might say that pain is a useful tool in diagnosing a problem. If, all of a sudden, your face starts hurting and you start seeing double, it might mean that you're in a fight and you better get your shit together or you're going to be getting your ass pulped.
Doctors also say pain can tell them that there might be something wrong with you. For instance, in that fight you lost, let's say that after you got knocked out, the victor gave you a nice love tap to your midsection with a steel toed boot.
Awake, you feel a sharp, shooting pain that starts at your navel and moves to the right, along with other symptoms. A Doctor would probably tell you to get to a hospital because all that kicking probably burst your appendix and unless you want to die like Harry Houdini you'll get off your fat ass and get checked.
What a Doctor would say is, "Pain is basically there to tell your body that you are facing a potential injury or that there might be something wrong. If you are smart you will either stop what you are doing or go to a Doctor and find out what is wrong."
What is interesting about the Human condition is that we are the only animal that can willingly choose to ignore it and many men have answered the call of the hero in war or during times of crisis when they ignored themselves to think of others.

Women And Pain[edit]

53a06e5aa112d - cos-01-knocked-up-z9ezjc-xl.jpg

Women feel pain, the problem with Women is that they're not men and they first thing that pops into their meager, unevolved, half-sized girl brain is how can they capitalize on it.
If no one is at home, the first thing your average woman will do is take a photo of said and post it straight to twitter to revel in all the ouches and poor baby posts she can get. If someone is home (RUN, YOU DUMB FUCK, RUN!) And especially if they are in a relationship, he is required to give up his whole day and baby her because she dropped a frozen chicken on her foot.
Then there's Child-birth.
For some reason western men fell for the idea that they are supposed to be supportive over a woman doing something she is SUPPOSED TO DO. Women whine and cry about being equals but in shit hole Arab countries when a man snaps his fingers 3 women jump up, one brings him a shawarma pita, the second a beer (no fucking beer in Arab countries, fgt, that's why they suck) hookah, and the third starts lifting up his man-robe to suck him off. The point is, when women are seen as lesser, they are for some reason stronger because they don't scream and moan about having a baby. When their water breaks, they go outside and squat like they're taking a shit and squeeze the brat out, then back to the kitchen. China, however, has extra steps. 1: Check for penis. 2: No penis, stomp head, make fetus soup, and tell husband you were just fat. 3: If penis there, go inside and brag about having a male heir.


Animals And Pain[edit]

The beauty of a Spanish Bullfight
The Matador shows his humanity by giving the bull the mercy of a quick death.

If you are one of those PETA cunts that believe dolphins are some super advanced alien species of killing machines from Mars and kittens have psychic powers and have predicted the future, you will probably stomp your feet and scream , "NO, NO, NO!" After reading this, "ANIMAL'S DON'T FEEL PAIN".
Pain is a HUMAN sensation, moreso a sociological or cultural expression of an external or internal stimulus that makes a person feel uncomfortable that can be expressed in words or other media. Basically, if you can talk, write, act, etc. you feel pain. Literaly, what this means is, if you can write a bad poem about it, you feel pain. William Blake said it best, "Nature is G-D's greatest failure." Again, because trees don't write poems about themselves.
Only humans feel pain, everything else reacts to An external or internal stimulus or rather the realization that something is causing a signal to be sent along the nervous system which could cause or be from harm. 💡SCIENCE
The difference between pain in humans and a neurological stimulus in animals is one of philosophy. Humans can overcome pain and fight it, animals avoid it and will do everything they can to get out of it.
Remember these words of wisdom when you're flicking your bean to Fifty Shades of Grey and Christian Weston Grey says, "Pain is all in the mind"

Men And Pain[edit]

If we do feel it we don't show it (unless, of course, you're a professional athlete) because once the age of 5 is reached society punishes us for it.
Take a good look at children in elementary school- the most emotional boys always get the title "fag".


Naruto And Pain[edit]

And its fans argue that this show ain't gay.

What emo, wristcutting, slant eyed mother fucker came up with this paean to homosexuality?
He took the name Pain because during some war, this is Naruto there's always a war, some Ninja that were nosing around his parent's house for food rightfully defended themselves and killed gay boys parents when his parents bravely attacked the ninja with the favored French tactic of a sneak attack from behind. The gayness doesn't end here, next the story wants you to believe that there's this written rule that says that a Soldier, Warrior or paid assassin like a Ninja has an honor code that says they can't kill a civilian in war because Japan is still trying to hide from what they did in Nanking, China.
Don't give me that Hollywood, made up Animu bushido honor crap that only exists in a story. It doesn't matter if you're a Samurai, a Viking, a Roman Legionnaire, a Texas Ranger or an Aztec Cuāuhocēlōtl - if a civilian attacks you, you can defend yourself accordingly because by attacking you, and according to the laws of war, by attacking, the civilian becomes a foreign combatant.
Oh, but fuckboy here, the pain of seeing mommy and daddy dying sent him to such depths of emo that he couldn't find release from the pain he felt inside him by cutting himself or putting more holes in his body. Oh no, he had to change his name to Pain and become a psycho sickfuck for story or Just Because.

Emotional Pain Or Psychological Pain[edit]

3emopain111.jpg
3emopain222.jpg

Emotional or Psychological Pain does not exist. What most people confuse for emotional pain is the real emotion of the anger they have and the sudden desire to punch someone in the face for making an all too truthful opinion that said crybaby is fat, stupid or ugly.
What happens, is because the Crybaby didn't follow through with their desire and punched the person given them the unpopular opinion, it sits at the subconscious and festers inside their head like summer roadkill on an Arizona highway. It's very Freudian and gestalt. The regret of the crybaby for not punching their abusers starts to hide and every time the thought attempts to return, the crybaby tries to hide from it by hurting themselves through drugs or other self-destructive acts. Over time, this regret starts to be felt as pain too because the crybaby has taught themselves this through cutting and self destructive acts. Because the mind knows that the thought will cause the crybaby to hurt themselves, the brain actually begins to associate the thought with pain. Now when it comes up, the regret is so confused that there is no memory of it and the crybaby only feels what they call emotional pain because, now, their brain is so confused by so many differant stimuli that all the crybaby can do is cry.
Think on this, the more and more we make our children impotent by refusing them their right to fight and defend the bully's right of free speech, more and more kids are going emo and cutting themselves. Fuck Kennedy, this is the real conspiracy. If you want your kid off Zoloft and to stop cutting themselves, sign the kid up for krav maga lessons and after 6 months tell him to kick the shit out of their bully and you'll be surprised when you don't get up to find blood in the bathroom or no longer need to spend $2,000 a month on meds, a doctor and a therapist.
Jesus might have said, "Love thy neighbor as you would yourself", but what do you do when your neighbor follows the same idea but hates himself?

In a nutshell, what most people call emotional or psychological pain is actually frustration.

See Also[edit]


City Street.jpg

Pain (Physical)
is part of a series on

Life

[BRB HugboxGo Live One]

City Skyline.jpg
Atom small.png
Atom small.png

Pain (Physical) is part of a series on

SCIENCE!

[FizzlePop]

[Click to CollapseClick to Expand]
Pain (Physical) is part of a series on Body and Health
Body.jpg Body Parts:

AssAssholeBallsBodybuildingBoobsBrainCameltoeClitorisCockCumFatFeetFinger BoxGuntHand of ClodHand of DiosIron penisManginaMoobsNeckbeardPissPussyShitSkeletonVagooWash Your Hands

Diseases and Illnesses:

AcneAddictionAIDSAlzheimer'sBeing a GingerCancer (and The Cancer That Is Killing /b/) • Comcast diseaseDiabeetusDiseaseDSMDuckfaceDwarfismEbolaEpilepsyErectile dysfunctionETDFetal Alcohol SyndromeFibromyalgiaGenital HerpesGRIDS (see also The GRIDS that is killing ED) • Heart AttackHyperbolimiaIRC DiseaseObesityPandemicParkinson's DiseaseSame Face SyndromeSARSSexually Transmitted DiseasesSwine FluThin SkinUser Stress SyndromeVirusVomitingWikipedia's Greatest Hits DiseasesZika

Injuries: 1guy1jarBMECircumcisionCastrationDeathEmo Cutter GirlEunuch ArchiveGuroHangoverHeadshotLJ cutLobotomyPain SeriesPregnancyRectal foreign bodySelf-injurySuicideTattoosTrepanation