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Paranoid

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Atomic.gif Warning!
This page is watching you through the window.

I've been trying to get a message through to you for the last six months. Ever since ever you started noticing those "coincidences", the government has placed you under surveillance. In fact, you are being observed RIGHT NOW. (The neighbor's dog is actually a robot spy that can see and hear through walls. The barking transmits information about you to the aliens.) A chip was implanted in your brain that will allow you to communicate with the alien race. You will be activated on the day the Earth stands still. Hopefully you will be able to prevent the imminent pwnage of the planet.

The good news is that you are getting close to the truth: 9-11, Jews, chemtrails, and Lindsey Lohan's breasts... They are ALL CONNECTED!!! Just keep working on those equations - and refer to this page for more clues.

The bad news is that you are in grave danger---yes, you ARE important enough to notice and persecute! According to reliable sources, any day now you will have an unfortunate accident involving the Goodyear Blimp and a can of WD-40. Your only hope is to stay indoors, smear peanut butter over your balls, post equations on walls, and cover yourself in tinfoil. Like this:

Tinfoil hats and plans to summon the Antichrist.

Good luck to you! The fate of mankind rests upon your shoulders.

See: Liberal

or

See: Stoner

Symptoms

Leaves long diatribes explaining why they are leaving a community involving aliens, how the CIA is watching them through their teeth, and leaves posts about how the hills have eyes. May also attend Grad school. Is a Prepper.

StalkedinBoston defending herself from the UPS conspiracy
Ya fukken lunatic!



Jackie-Chan is also a stalker




ANOTHER STALKER!



Possible Causes

See also

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Paranoid is part of a series on

Truth

Visit the Truth Portal for complete coverage.

[Case ClosedOpen Up to Us]
Paranoid is part of a series on Psychology
Antisocial personality disorder Hannibal Lector.jpg Mental illness & Disorders

AcrotomophiliaAddictionAgoraphobiaAlcoholismAlexis Pilkington SyndromeAlzheimer'sAnorexiaAntisocial personality disorderAnthropophobiaAnxietyADDADHDAsperger's SyndromeAutismBimboficationBipolarBorderline personality disorderBug ChasingBulimiaDeep thinkerDepressionDick ImpalementDown's SyndromeDyslexiaEating disorderFactitious disorderFake SchizophreniaFauxlimiaFeminismGender dysphoriaGirl on the Internet SyndromeHeterophobiaHero ComplexHFAHistrionic Personality DisorderHutchence's SyndromeHyperbolimiaInadequacyInconsistent personality disorderInsanityLiberal Butthurt SyndromeLow Self-esteem'Missing White Woman' SyndromeMultiple personality disorderNapoleon ComplexNarcissistic personality disorderNeurotypicalObsessive Compulsive DisorderParanoiaParanoid personality disorderPeter Pan SyndromePost-Traumatic Stress DisorderPsychopathyRetardationSchizophreniaSeasonal Affective DisorderSelf-diagnosisSelf InjurySexsomniaSickfuckerySociopathySocial anxiety disorderSpecial Snowflake SyndromeTrolling Induced Transsexuality SyndromeTulpaUnrealistic expectationsVictim complex

Fetishes:

AcrotomophiliaAquaphiliaArborphiliaAudiophiliaAutogynephiliaBalloon FetishBestialityCarmen Electra complexCross DressingDollfiliaEmetophiliaEmosexualityEproctophiliaFatty Fetish (Female Fat Admirer) • FetishismFoot FetishFurniture PornFurrismGoo girlGuroHeterophiliaHomophiliaInflation FetishJapanophiliaJungle FeverLesbian pedophiliaLotion PlayMacrophiliaMaiesiophiliaMechanophiliaMpregNecrophiliaObjectophiliaOedipial ComplexParaphiliaPedophiliaPlushophiliaPregnant LoliPregnophiliaQuicksand FetishRangerphiliaSpectrophiliaStatuephiliaTrichophiliaVoraphiliaWet and Messy FetishismWetlookXenophiliaYellow feverZoophilia

E-Psychosis:

Chronic Troll SyndromeDeletionismE-goE-PsychiatristE-PsychiatryETDHivemindI-DosingI have a 140 IQIRC DiseaseImaginary girlfriendInternet Disease & Internet Disease ChartInternet poverty delusionsInternet RehabInternet troll personality disorderMega ultra super geniusNerdy Fandom Gateway TheorySex by associationLulz-BlindnessWikipedia's Greatest Hits Diseases

Experiments:

ask.fmBrainwashingHypnosisMilgram ExperimentScientologyStanford Prison ExperimentThe Hivemind Corollary

Sites:

Above Top SecretB/Bodies Under SiegeCYOCChatrouletteDefense Industries OrganizationDeekerFoolQuest.comInkBunnyNeuticles.comPsyke.orgWarpMyMind.com

See also:

American Psychiatric AssociationAngerASMRChild abuseConscienceDreamDSMEnlightenmentIntelligenceLobotomyPsychiatristySerial KillersTake the meat bridgeThe Law of ConformityTrigger Warning

This is a disambiguation page — we hope you feel less ambiguated.