In the mid 90's, PlayStation fanbois rejoiced at the "newest" survival-horror game, Silent Hill. Featuring shitty graphics (using the lame excuse that it made the game creepier), terrible controls, and lack of coherent plot line, it naturally became a best seller in America and Britain, spawning
five four sequels, three two prequels, a movie, toys, an arcade game, comics...wow, Konami really had some free time.
Silent Hill is a town that just can't get its story straight. It's almost like none of the designers past the third game ever bothered to play the games before them. Maybe it's a case of trying to revamp a series, but, most likely, it's just that they were too lazy to even try.
Three things are constant in any Silent Hill game
- The town is foggy (or has snow/ash/rain). This makes up for the designers' inability to remove the many clipping issues the games have.
- There are monsters. Since Silent Hill 2, these monsters have been made increasingly fappable in order to increase the size of the fanbase.
- There is some sort of paranormal crap going on. Either that or the main character is insane.
Mixing the three you get convoluted maps that are different every game even though it's always the same town. Even the few reused landmarks (hospital, school, hotel) move, so don't bother using those to pinpoint your location. For bonus geek points, count the number of name changes each landmark has through the games.
Here is a quick overview of just the paranormal elements.
- Silent Hill: WTF? No clue what's going on... most likely aliens. That or drug-infested orgies.
- Silent Hill 2: James is insane. Either that or the dog did it all.
- Silent Hill 3: There is a cult worshiping the monsters as servants of God, even going so far as equating each monster to a Christian angel. Valatiel (crank guy) is Metatron and Pyramid Head is archangel Michael. Either that or Heather is Sailor Moon!
- Silent Hill 4 (The Room): Vengeful ghosts are causing it all. You might be a serial killer, you might not.
- Silent Hill (2006): A cult has channeled Satan into the form of a little girl (Alessa/Cheryl). The shifts to the "Otherworld" are more apparent in the movie thanks to special effects. Oh, and witch burning. Don't forget the barbed wire rape. Lots and lots of barbed wire rape.
- Silent Hill 5 (Origins): Takes a nod from the movie, yet fails to even sync up facts from the film!
- Silent Hill 6 (Homecoming): Alex is insane. Oh, and maybe a cult?
- Silent Hill 7 (Shattered Memories): Cheryl is insane and remembering the past. Also, strong ice motif just to be different.
- Silent Hill 8 (Downpour): Most likely something to do with insanity or cults. Also, strong water motif just to be different
- Silent Hill P.T. (Playable Teaser): The unholy combination of Guillermo Del Toro and Hideo Kojima. No new Silent Hill game has been released since. Also stars the Sheriff from The Walking Dead, to be continued never.
- Adorable fat little squeaky ghosts that don't do shit and are just there to be cute. They just squeak when you run and "scare" them.
- Insane main characters
- Jumping/reaching into a hole
- Giant, phallic monsters
- Killing off all the hawt girls you meet along the way unless you are a girl.
- Killing "God" over and over again
- Mother fucking camera that would rather focus on your character cowering in a corner than the vomiting epileptic abortions closing in on you.
- Psychological themes which users on GameFAQs write textbooks on using only the knowledge they gained from community college intro to psych classes.
- Tentacle rape
- Vomiting epileptic abortions that quickly close in on you
For those who don't know, Pyramid Head is supposed to be symbolic for a lot of different things, for one, Pyramid Head is supposed to symbolize James Sunderland's emotional torture and reflect James' actions IRL, acting as his alter ego.
The metallic "pyramid" he wears is meant to be symbolic for a Judas Cradle because James remained platonic while his wife was dying and remains as such to this day causing him sexual frustration to an all new extreme, which also explains Pyramid Head's tendencies to fuck everything he sees until it dies; James' desire to fuck and fuck until his balls explode. Pyramid Head wears the supposed Judas Cradle on his head because it's reminiscent of an executioner, giving further exposition as to how James views himself; as a cold and emotionally disconnected murderer.
As far as James actions are concerned, Pyramid Head pursues James because Pyramid Head also encompasses James' desire to be punished for his crime. Pyramid Head actively kills a women named Maria, a sexualized version of James' wife Mary, whenever she gets in his way of pursuing James; this is meant to represent James compulsively killing his wife in pursuit to get his life back.
When James decides that he wants revenge instead of punishment, the Pyramid Heads cease to properly function and an hero.
Pyramid Head does what he does because he's a manifestation of James' desire to be punished & represents James himself in the fact that he's a murderer; Pyramid Head actively murders Maria, a women who resembles James' wife Mary. Pyramid Head actively kills Maria because she gets in the way of his objective, just in the same way James murdered his wife Mary because she was in the way of him leading his life. Pyramid Head reflects what James' truly is; a sex depraved, sex crazed executioner.
Degeneration in translation
While all this symbolism and philosophy is good 'n all, the sad reality is that the only reason anyone noticed him at all isn't because of his psychological attributes and representations, but rather because he's such a strong "male" figure. The Great Knife, huge long spear and obvious naked male torso are the only aspects everybody pays attention to because they appeal to the thing that every woman, faggot and man with a small dick want: a huge penis and a nice body. He only has a fandom because lazy cunts like you don't get off the couch and exercise. Get off your cheeto-stained ass once in awhile and maybe the women (or fags if you swing that way) will be after you instead of some imaginary rape-beast.
Even though there are lots and lots of other notable and far more fappable monsters, for some reason, everyone keeps fixated on Pyramid Head.
As you can see, Pyramid is well noted, but he's well noted for all the wrong reasons.
Degeneration in translation part 2
Just like the issue of people lacking in the ability to fully understand what the character is actually supposed to be about without the likes of ED telling you and only taking his physique into regard, other people heard about people sexually liking Pyramid Head but didn't understand why, or some shit like that, so they ended up creating female hentai of the character. We would show you here on ED, but unfortunately, no matter what file format we use we cannot upload photos anymore, so you can observe here. Some of them are actually quite good.
Harry Mason: A 30-something widower, his car gets pwned by Alessa on the highway outside Silent Hill and he is forced to run around for at least 100 hours looking for his lost daughter. He has an extremely short attention span and a one-track mind, often unable to carry on conversations for more than 10 seconds without changing the subject to his daughter, who has short, black hair and just turned seven last Thursday. At least that's how it was before Shattered Memories, where they fuck everything up in the story, Harry's dead IRL, and Cheryl's Emo-laced memories are where the game is actually "played" through.
Dahlia Gillespie: Disgusting old lady who shouts GYROMANCY at random. Serves as a figure head in the cult, tortured her clairvoyant daughter ritualistically so Alessa could incubate and birth her god. Get's pwn'd by Michael Kaufmann.
Dr. Michael Kaufmann: Director of the hospital where Alessa was being kept for seven years, murders one of his nurses and turns on Dahlia Gillespie at the end of the game.
James Sunderland: A murderous, bipolar psycho who spends most of his time in Silent Hill dealing with serial rapists, asshole little girls, suicidal teenagers, fat guys, and strippers who look like his dead wife. He gets pwned by a puppy. He wears really shitty boots, and has a 9 year old girl stomp. He's also a fucking dumbass who has a habit of getting outsmarted by an 8 year old girl and saying stupid shit at the wrong time, such as asking a crazy mother fucker who has just killed someone and announced that he'll also kill anyone who makes fun of him if he's gone crazy. There's also the whole "my wife must be alive even though she died because I got a letter from her!" thing he's got going on. Pyramid Head's butt toy.
Eddie Dombrowski: Bastard manchild who goes fucking psycho and detaches himself from reality. Fled to Silent Hill in an attempt to avoid the cops after he shot a dog in the crotch and proceeded to blast the dogs owner in the leg. You eventually kill him. The dog ending was originally intended for Eddie; he was supposed to find the dog sitting in the chair, recognize it and instantly remember why he killed it before coming to Silent Hill; the dog was solely responsible for all the torture he went through during childhood and was pulling the strings literally in this fashion. In the ending, he proceeds to shoot the dog again, followed with James running to assault him; Eddie proceeds to shoot James in the knee before fleeing to Raccoon City. But because James Sunderland blows his ass away, this moment of epic lulz would never proceed.
Angela Orosco: A whiny teenager who kills herself. She thinks that James is her mother, because she is also batshit insane. She's a creepy fuck who came to Silent Hill to find her concerned mother after murdering her sexually abusive father and repressed the memory of committing the act.
Maria [Sunderland?] : A stupid slut who dies over 9000 times. Stripper version of James' dead wife. Always asks for it from James, but that's because James is imagining her. Also a psycho bitch that wears a dog collar.
Heather Mason: By far the most intelligent character in the entire series, she knows that mixing Acid and Base cleaning products is a recipe for success. Because she's a woman, she's considerably piss weak compared to the rest of the Silent Hill protoganists, but is so realistically designed, she is by far the most loved. Heather spends most of her game being knocked up by the Silent Hill Death Cult's demon god, but she takes the red pill at the end and pukes it out. She also has Over 9000 names and ages, thoughtfully placed in the game to confuse the fuck out of the player. But as she is a hawt chick who turns into Sailor Moon and gets a lightsaber, she is the best character by default.
Henry Townshend: A one-dimensional monobrow who spends most of his time spying on his hot next door neighbor through a hole in the wall and bearing witness to lulzy murders. Surprisingly attracts more women than you would think. Is the biggest pussy of all 100+ protagonists, since he never actually has the balls to go to Silent Hill. Walks and runs like a lobotomized polio victim. Is constantly featured in fanfiction, getting it up the ass by Walter Sullivan. Fangirls dont realise that it wouldn't ever actually happen, due to Walter's mother watching him.
Travis Grady: Growing up as basically an orphan was lulzy compared to how he became an orphan. His mom got locked up in an asylum in Silent Hill when she tried to kill him, claiming he was going to be a black person. Then his dad, being a Childfree parent, hangs himself in their hotel room while his kid is playing vidja gaems and pinball a few doors away. Ironically has a Pyramid Head 2.0 called "The Butcher" following him around. Ironic because it's really him, but because they have a "mirror world" in the short, short, shoooort game he's in, it's actually him from the mirror, but it's his serial killer persona.
Alex Shepherd: An Americunt soldier coming back from a war to see his seriously fucked-up family in a town named after his great-great-great-great-Grand Dragon. Occasionaly accompanied by a black person and some stupid blonde bitch, he eventually turns into shota-chaser, looking for his younger brother in a movie-to-game-fanfiction that rings something like Children of the Corn. Oh, and it turns out he was actually imagining everything, because he killed his fucking brother over a ring, and he's only picturing this whole story to not realize he's getting the ever-loving shit shocked out of him in a psych-ward, unless you get the good ending, in which he never realizes he's mentally unstable.
- One of the "original" games Silent Hill's ripping off
- The one that Silent Hill: Homecoming ripped off
- The AZNs responsible for this shit
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