Roman Polanski

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jump to navigation Jump to search
R. Polański, lucky sick fuck. He's doing it for the lulz since 1977.

Roman Raymond Polański (Otherwise known as Pedolański or Roman Hands Polański) is a lollercaust surviving hebe turned renowned film directing pedophile and, as his non-Christian name implies, a filthy Polack as well.

He is known for sucking, fucking, cumming in the mouth, vagina, and pooper of, then once again making sweet, sweet Jew love to the "almost 14" 13 (closer to 12 than 16) year old loli (born Tami Sue Nye, renamed Samantha Jane Gailey when adopted, which was the name she had during the 1977 trial, renamed Samantha Gailey Geimer when she got married prior to 2000) in 1977. This after she knowingly washed down 250mg of quaaludes with his glass of champagne as she had already chugged hers while previously posing toplessly in Jack Nicholson's jacuzzi. Roman then drove her home and SHOWED Sam's TOPLESS photos to her sister, dog (who urinated on the floor at the sight), mother, and her mother's boyfriend who gaped in awe.

He is also known for his fucked up movies which produce fap fuel for sick fucks and earn him kudos from Hollywood’s elite. He is living the dream. Living the dream, man. Exceeept that last Thursday Polański went to Switzerland and was arrested by the Swÿss authorities.

He was recently released once the Swiss realized the laws of Jewmerica do not apply in Switzerland and when they admitted everyone except fags and women like to have sex with young girls anyway. Pedobear tried to remain composed, but overcome with emotion and pride, shed a single tear. Needless to say, christfags and moralfags let loose a torrent of BAWWWWWW.

The great Franco-Polish director can now freely rediscover his loved ones and devote himself fully to the pursuit of his artistic activities.


—Bernard Kouchner, French Foreign Minister

Mr. Polanski is a free man. It's not the job of the police to keep track of his movements.


—Ursula Stauffer, Spokeswoman for the Swiss Police

Manson Family Fun

Polański's wife at a Manson BBQ.

In 1969, Polański’s blonde, blue-eyed wife, Sharon Tate, was murdered by the Manson family. Tate was eight months pregnant with Polanski's future incest-rape victim at the time. When interviewed about this incident, Polański said “shit happens,” and "I was looking forwards to some anal spelunking inside the kid, but meh." He then went on to play an acting role in the movie The Magic Christian that same year. Polanski admitted that his wife's death destroyed the last of his faith, leaving him free to make sexy to all the loli. Reflecting on his failure to be there for his wife, he has written that the event changed him from an "boundless, untroubled sea of expectations and optimism" to "ingrained pessimism... eternal dissatisfaction with life". This is why it is ok for him to sex up lolis. If you don't believe that fact, then you are an anti-semitic, nazi, right-wing, christfag dick. Amirite Hollywood? S'awright? S'awriiiiight!

The Hero

Asking for it Begging for it!.

At least 100 years ago, Polański, a man in his 40’s lured a 13 year old girl by asking her mother if he could photograph her for Vogue magazine. During the photo shoot, he expected the loli to dress and undress in front of him. He took pills with champagne and she accepted his offer to do the same. Then he ate her pussy, and proceeded to fuck both holes.

Roman Polański instructed her to get into a jacuzzi naked, refused to take her home when she begged to go, began kissing her even though she said no and asked him to stop; performed cunnilingus on her as she said no and asked him to stop; put his penis in her vagina as she said no and asked him to stop; asked if he could penetrate her anally, to which she replied, "No", then went ahead and did it anyway, until he had an orgasm.


—Salon, Explaining why Polański should be given the Nobel prize in child rearing.

He was tried and initially pled "not guily" to at least 100 charges, but after being promised that he wouldn't serve any more time, pled guilty. His defense was “I did it for the lulz”. He fled to Bel-Air France to avoid prison.


Fire up old sparky and let him ride the lightning.


—Pat Buchanan, a bitter and jealous potato-fucking Nazi fagtard, on MSNBC's Morning Joe, in response to some libtard Jew defending Polański, Sep. 28, 2009

How Polanski Got Busted.

Pedobear's campaign

This message is approved by Pedobear: "Om nom, nom, nom, it's me, Pedobear and I need you to get out this message of freedom! My good friend Roman Pedolanski has been arrested, only for raping have fun with a little child! And look at her, she was clearly asking begging for it, she obviously enjoyed it! Srsly, how would you feel if you were Pedolanski and a mean judge would like to put you in prison for that! Help spreading the message and free him! Your friendly neighborhood, Pedobear."


Ze French

The French protested Polański's arrest most vigorously. "If we start arresting Polański for child rape, what's next, coming after the French for what they did to the Jew?!" Furthermore, prior to it, they refused to deport Polanski to the United States to face his criminal charges, enforcing a treaty where they are not obligated to do so.


Hollywood, led by Woody Allen, also threw in its support for Polański. The Hollywood Cabal could not stand the idea of a fellow Jew pedophile going to prison. Other supporters include Jew directors David Lynch, Martin Scorsese, John Landis, and producer Harvey Weinstein. They even produced their "urban" crypto-Jew, Whoopie Goldberg, to win the masses over with this gem.

I just can't decide.
I know it wasn’t rape-rape. I think it was something else, but I don't believe it was rape-rape [...] We're a different kind of society. We see things differently. The world sees 13-year-olds and 14-year-olds in the rest of Europe [...] not everybody agrees with the way we see things…


WhoopiJew, Secret pedo?

We should have been celebrating the arrest of Osama bin Laden and not the arrest of Polański. [Roman Polański] is not responsible for killing anyone...


—Peter Fonda apparently ignoring the importance of all crimes excepting murder.

The Goldberg-Polański conjecture from number theory means that rape to the power of two will result in Jew gold for all. Some brave Mathemagicians are now investigating the possibility of Rape^Rape or "Rape to the power of Rape." Godspeed, you brave scientists!

The civilized world hopes that he gets extradited to the U.S. where his cellmate Bubba will make his asshole bleed a ticker tape parade in his honor for great lulz. Unless the Terminator will decide to pardon Polański for even greater drama and lulz.

Sweeeet Freeeedoooom

In a recent lulz update, the Swiss realized that child rape was a deep part of their cultural heritage, and denied the American extradition request. Pedophiles around the world rose up in joy and celebration as their savior was freed from the possibility of having to face puritan hillbilly justice, and instead is treated to the vacation that is european prison.


Bitter Moon

In this movie, a young man is unfaithful to his hot slutty French girlfriend (played by the current wife of Polański) and she cripples him from the waist down. She is then appointed his guardian and proceeds to torture him psychologically and physically and has sex with other men in front of him. The story ends when the man does a murder suicide and kills both her and himself.

Death and the Maiden

In this movie, macrophile pinup girl Sigourney Weaver plays a Chilean woman who encounters a man who she believes had tortured her many years back. She tortures him and in one scene stuffs her soiled panties down his throat. The movie ends with a mind fuck where she’s about to throw him off the cliff and he confesses to torturing her.

The Tenant

Polański stars as the new tenant in the apartment where the previous occupant killed herself. All his neighbors are kind of fucked up, so he thinks that they might be trying to turn him into this girl so they can start the cycle over again. Great for anyone who wants to see Roman Polański in a skirt and panties (nobody).


[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]


Sam describes cuddliness
In America, California, I lose my wife, my baby, my friends, perhaps my sanity and almost my freedom. No, I say, no! The Nazis couldn’t take it away from me, nor could the grief of my losses. And this little whore and the California laws won’t either. I have given much and they have taken too much from me.


—Polanski in 1978 [1], being a drama queen true Mensch

If I had killed somebody, it wouldn’t have had so much appeal to the press, you see? But… fucking, you see, and the young girls. Judges want to fuck young girls. Juries want to fuck young girls. Everyone wants to fuck young girls!


—Polanski in 1979 [2]

For the lulz? No, for the cunt.


—Roman Polanski, on why he rapes

External Links






  • Dramatized reading (for people who don't want to read and just listen to radio personalities read the transcripts) Part 1 & Part 2
  • Roman Polanski Plea Transcript (19 pages) Angelica Huston: "She appeared to be one of those kind of little chicks between, could be between any age up to 25. She did not look like a 13-year-old little scared thing, didn't appear to be distressed. She seemed sullen, which I thought was a little rude."
  • 2003 Interview of Samantha by Larry King on CNN: "he showed them slides from the first shoot that showed me topless, and they were -- their jaws dropped and they're shocked and the dog peed over the floor, and I missed all that. So I just went to my room."

May News


Roman Polanski
is part of a series on
Raelian symbol.png
Patriarchs [-+]
Habitats [-+]
Traditions [-+]
H8s [-+]
Roman Polanski is part of a series on
UnV& Pedophiles [-+]

Aaron WilliamsAdam LanzaAlenonimoAlison RappAmber ButtrumAndy MaherAngryjediAnimatedJamesBeefraveBikerfoxBill CosbyBritbongCasey AnthonyChaosscizzorsColonel McBadassComicalityCyril SmithDaddyOFiveDahvie VanityDangermanDeekerDidaskalosDynacatlovesmeEric RidenourErik MöllerFergie OliverFrank BonafedeGreg MazujianGreville JannerG-ZayHarrison DigfootHumonHypnoHunter MooreIrish282James Terry Mitchell JrJerry Peetjervaise brooke hamsterJimmy SavileJohn Patrick RogersJonathan YanivJoseph KonyJustin BerryJustin DabrowKaitlyn HuntKatherine MarionKyle PerkinsLena DunhamLeonard F. Shaner Jr.LittleCloudLtFlaggerLogansperman2Lucian HodobocM. ChaosMagicrichMandoPonyMichael JacksonMikevirusMatrooko11MZMcBrideNathanrNeil FoxOmegaloreOnideus Mad HatterOnisionPaul WalkerPennywisePurple AkiRalph SquillaceRiverman72Roger SampsonSam DeathWalkerSam RassenfossSarah ButtsShane LeeSibeScientologySethistoSophie LabelleTheAmazingAtheistThomas Watt HamiltonTimboxTrap-kunTyciolUncle GrandpaUpdownmostlyViolentacrezVonHeltonWoody AllenW. T. SnacksYoung Tubers UnitedYtask

Portal trolls.png

Roman Polanski is part of a series on


Visit the Trolls Portal for complete coverage.

Portal icon television.gif

Roman Polanski is part of a series on


Visit the Media Portal for complete coverage.

Featured article October 12, 2009
Preceded by
The Comprehensive Guide To Life
Roman Polanski Succeeded by
Flash Mob