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Salman Rushdie is a little brown man who writes thick snobby books while literary pundits attempt to lick his ass in adulation. Most of his work revolves around how shitty life is on the Indian sub-continent and will often contain elements of fantasy or magic, but nobody gives a shit about this because they are too pissed off from trying to read his run on sentences that can go for pages.
The only thing this swarthy, balding runt has ever done of any merit was troll approximately 1 billion people all at once by referring to their exalted profit as "Mahound." The best part of the whole mess is the fact that he was trying to be nice to Islam but they completely missed the point.
—Rushdie, in a classic run-on sentence, likens himself to some sort of gifted outsider.
Salman Rushdie was born to rich parents in post-World War II Bombay, India. Like all Indians, he prefers that we call his hometown "Mumbai" but since the world has pretty much been ignoring the country since the British moved out, nobody worries about it. Because he doesn't care for Indian people himself, he quickly moved out of the country and headed for England where he could go write his books around people as conceited and arrogant as he aspired to be.
Rushdie, like most of his fellow countrymen is a philandering lech who's enormous appetites have caused him to be married four times. These self-indulgent ways have also caused him to become a huge fatty, but he would probably cite his hours of industrious work on stories, novels, and screenplays as the cause of his corpulence because as we all know, sitting at a word processor morning, noon, and night is such hard work.
When he isn't in hiding, he can usually be found dating women 40 years younger than himself or collecting a pile of meaningless awards which the British, French, Americans, and inexplicably, the Italians trip over each other to give to him. Most of these awards are given to him in huge gala affairs where he can showcase his latest eye candy Indian models and while everybody tries to take pictures of the writer, they also attempt to "miss" the mustaches his girlfriends almost always forget to wax the night before.
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—Rushdie could edit for Encyclopedia Dramatica.
The only thing of note this man has ever done is write the 1988 novel "The Satanic Verses," in which he trolls the whole Islamic religion. Within the text, he refers to Mohammed as "Mahound" which mocks the prophet by basically calling him "my hound." He then goes on to write that Mahound mentions three other deities besides the mighty Allah. The Muslim reaction was quite predictable. Cities were in riot, hair was pulled out, teeth were gnashed, hands were wrung, cars were burned, and local carry-out shops were closed. In 1989, the leader of Iran, Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini, issued a fatwa against Rushdie, ordering all Muslims to kill the fatty on sight.
—The Ayatollah could edit for Encyclopedia Dramatica too!
While most of the world was busy doing something else, Rushdie went into hiding as he feared for his skin more than he feared for the abuse of his rights. Over the years after the fatwa was issued, several of Rushdie's friends, peers, and publishers were targeted by Muslim extremist attacks and many were injured or killed. Rushdie remained in hiding.
After the death of the Ayatollah Khomeini, some Iranian leaders suggested that if Rushdie simply apologize for his words, the fatwa would just go away. Rushdie released a backhanded comment that tried to half ass a small apology, but the Muslims saw it for what it was and the fatwa was again repeated in the worldwide press. This time, British Muslims also agreed with the death sentence and several swore that they would carry out the punishment themselves, despite the fact that British law is quite different and very clear concerning public displays of Islamic justice.
While all of this was going on, some smart Iranian fucker decided to point out that a fatwa cannot be withdrawn unless it is withdrawn by the original Imam who issued it. Thus, no matter what he does, Rushdie is, and always will be a marked man because Khomeini is dead. So for Rushdie, it is life as usual; he hides someplace in the British Isles, putting all of his friends at risk. He only comes out to either cash his huge royalty checks, appear on Food Network television shows, be knighted by Queen Elizabeth II, or collect yet another silly award for a droning novel about some Indian guy telling you his boring life story. Meanwhile, his trophy ex-wives all live in fear that their next step might be their last because the bald little fucker wrote a naughty story.
Gallery of Rushdie Sluts
For some odd reason, women are attracted to successful writers. Perhaps it is the artistic quality they seem to have? No, it's cash. Below you will find a gallery of women will sleep with anything for money, and these gold-digging whores who will let Rushdie do just about anything he wants to them.
There are whole forums dedicated to Rushdie. Most of them will ban you if you start mentioning Islamic dogma, but some will allow the arguments to stretch on for months.
- Muhammad Cartoons
- Middle East
- The Satanic Verses of Bhagavad-gita
- We have lifted the fatwa...lol kidding!
- Fellow writer and noted drunk, Christopher Hitchens is Rushdie's pal.
- Salman Rushdie: Culture Warrior.
- Rushdie's lawyer talks about hiding the writer.
- Christians, Jews and Muslims all discussing something peacefully? wtf!
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