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Spies

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As used by Alex Wuori

Spies are the best kept secret on the internet. They monitor, license and police all activity on the internet. They're the first, last, and only line of defense. They live in secret, they exist in their mother's basement.

Spies, in an internet sense, can fall into one of two similar, yet distinct, categories.


Psyops

Anonymous integrating himself secretly

Psyops are the intelligence gathering forces within Anonymous. Typically, prior to any well organized raid they will infiltrate the group in question, ingratiating themselves with the herd and gathering information on potential targets and the most lulzy ways to troll the users. Following the start of a raid they will do one of two things, depending on which seems more lulzy, they will either replace signatures as goatse where applicable or otherwise spam shock images or alternatively they will act butthurt, cement the idea that it was all Ebaumsworld and try to foment disgust with admins and maximize the fallout from the raid.


Failops

Failop spies

Failops are the non Anon version, typically those lurking on ircs or on the chans, waiting for any sign of potential lulz, moving quickly to try to stop them. A classic example of this type of behavior is that of the noted fucktard, Alex Wuori. Common motivations for this group are a sense of being butthurt combined with a sense of unwarranted self importance which leads them to think of themselves as internet police. Often they think of themselves as zOmG l337 Ha)()(ors!!!111! because they have learned how to use a whois search. Normally they will act by alerting a target to a raid prior to it starting. This is always made of fail as Anon doesn't give a shit and raids, though they might lose the element of surprise, will nevar stop once planned.


How to do it rite

When psyopping, you should copy the language used by the targets. For example, during the subeta raids there were numerous embedded psyops that served to sway the opinions of the longtime users by exposing the faggotry at work running the place. This led to numerous users with over 9000 posts being b& before the eventual suicide of the psyops in a hail of goatse. If you are prematurely discovered then you will have wasted your time and should become an hero. The following measures should be adhered to:

  • DON'T name yourself after a meme. Choose something innocuous like JamesDeer89 or some weeaboo shit.
  • DON'T start new topics or otherwise draw excessive attention until you've posted/lurked.
  • DON'T mention your username on a chan site. Targets spy too.
  • DO agree with the mods on non important issues
  • DO Baaaaaaaaaaww when the raids start
  • DO screenshot the drama as it unfolds, then share with the rest of Anon

If you try and keep a low profile but steadily post/lurk then you will be in a position where, when the raids start you can influence the faggots. Remember, this job is not for the faint of heart, you may be exposed to near fatal levels of drama and faggotry. However, this job does have a high potential for lulz in the right circumstances. If unsuccessful though, major butthurt will ensue.

See also

  • The Steganographers
  • CIA - Aside from internet spies there may or may not be a real life equivalent.
  • FBI - When cops meet spies, you get the v&.
  • Mossad - An excuse of Jews to justify the whole "we just follow you" thing.
  • Alex Wuori - A noted failop
  • Michelle Madigan - Failed reporter who posed as a programmer for h4x0r information.
  • Engineer - their biggest targets.