The Academy Awards

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So much drama, over this piece of plastic.
NO!!! THEY DESERVED THE OSCAR MORE!!!

The Academy Awards (A.K.A. The Oscars) are an annual awards ceremony in case you ever wanted to know what some anonymous old kikes thought were the best films of every year since 1927. While no one gives any real credence to the Academy, much butthurt is still to be had when the nominees/winners are announced and people sulking over which movies got robbed, complete with idiot lefitsts seething over the lack of diversity in their choices. Like with every other piece of media, it's been repeatedly been taken advantage of by the Jews and their drones to shove their propaganda down everyone's throats by way of producing politically manipulative drivel to appeal to Academy voters, giving us the popular phrase "Oscarbait" (type Ctrl+F to see how often "Oscarbait" is used in this article). Sometimes they succeed, sometimes justice prevails. With that said, these awards are a million times more bearable than cancer like the Emmys or the Grammys.

History[edit]

For those who care, here's a quick rundown on all the winners of the Academy Awards by decade, some of it's accompanying nominees, and which brand of bait they fall into. Condensed as much as possible for the tl;dr crowd.

1920s[edit]

1927/1928: Wings - The first Best Picture winner, and the only silent winner before some frog decided to nostalgiabait in 2011. It is a tale of 2 war pilots in love with 1 girl. It's alright, but it's no Michael Bay's Pearl Harbor.

Also nominated: 7th Heaven, The Racket

Sunrise - Yes, there were technically 2 Best Picture winners for the first year of the Oscars, the recepient being F.W. Murnau's overrated expressionist film Sunrise. This branch was named "Best Picture - Artistic Production", and they ditched the category the next year because the Academy doesn't care about art at all.

Also nominated: The Crowd, and something about elephants

1928/1929: The Broadway Melody - HOLY FUCKING SHIT, THERE'S SOUND!!! Remember Singin' in the Rain? If so, that's what early talkies were like. All primitive and awkward. With that said, this showbiz flick is still a masterpiece compared to the rest of the crap that got nominated.

Also nominated: The Hollywood Revue of 1929 (Yes, they actually nominated a Hollywood circlejerk show that year. It's like if they nominated their own Oscar ceremonies.)

1930s[edit]

1929/1930: All Quiet on the Western Front - A pretty cool movie about World War I. Was released over a decade after the war actually ended, so naturally the Academy would find it fashionable to award this anti-war movie for being "brave" (a trend that continues today with the #MeToo movement)

Also nominated: Disraeli (the first Jew movie to be nominated, winning Best Actor for George Arliss)

Good old 1930s.

1930/1931: Cimarron - One of many nostalgic spectacle flicks to win Best Picture. It has a racist depiction of a black character, so naturally it gets considered the worst Best Picture winner ever made by the masses. Just see the remake instead.

Also nomianted: Some lost movie, The Front Page, a wildlife documentary Trader Horn, and Skippy (The ONLY comic movie to be nominated for Best Picture, plus the youngest Best Actor nominee)

1931/1932: Grand Hotel - Not The Grand Budapest Hotel. This play adaptation is mostly noteworthy for being the only movie to win Best Picture without being nominated for anything else.

Also nominated: The Champ, The Smiling Lieutenant

1932/1933: Cavalcade - More nostalgia for the old farts at the Academy. Basically a serious version of Forrest Gump.

Also nominated: I Am a Fugitive From a Chain Gang, The Private Life of Henry VIII.

1934: It Happened One Night - One of the few Frank Capra movies that isn't the exact same as every other Frank Capra movie. This little comedy was so good it managed to beat Cecil B. DeMille's epic picture Cleopatra

Also nominated: The Thin Man, The Gay Divorcee, The House of Rothschild (George Arliss's second attempt at Jew Oscarbait but failing)

1935: Mutiny on the Bounty - Fat Charles Laughton plays a captain on an old ship and the shipmates rebel against him. WATCH IT.

Also nominated: Top Hat, Captain Blood, Les Miserables, Alice Adams, The Informer (which won 4 Oscars including Best Director for John Ford, Mutiny only won BP)

1936: The Great Ziegfeld - A really boring 3 hours of spectacle that revolves this old Broadway producer from 100 years ago. Hollywood gives praise to showbiz yet again.

Also nominated: Mr. Deeds Goes to Town, San Francisco

1937: The Life of Emile Zola - A movie about a guy getting sentenced for no reason and the newspapers making everyone form a mob against the guy who wants to set him free, resulting in the law further keeping him in submission indefinitely. In other words, it's a million times more "timely" than most of the allegorical garbage that the Academy likes to push nowadays.

Also nominated: Lost Horizon, Captains Courageous, The Good Earth

1938: You Can't Take it With You - Yet another Frank Capra flick. The same Jimmy Stewart socialist feel-good stuff you've already seen from Capra only this time it won 2 Oscars in the year 1939.

Also nominated: Pygmalion, Grand Illusion, The Adventures of Robin Hood.

1939: Gone With The Wind - The most famous movie of all time and your history teacher's favorite film. It receives flak for not race-baiting the slaves hard enough (Like with Song of the South) and for being remotely sympathetic to the confederacy.

Also nomianted: The Wizard of Oz, Stagecoach, Mr. Smith Goes to Washington.

1940s[edit]

Best film ever made.

1940: Rebecca - The ONLY Hitchcock film to win Best Picture (and he still didn't win an Oscar, LOL. They gave it to John Ford for the 1000th time.).

Also nomianted: The Grapes of Wrath, The Great Dictator

1941: How Green Was My Valley - John Ford strikes again, this time amassing the biggest load of butthurt in history for taking Best Picture from Citizen Kane, the film that film scholars believe invented LITERALLY EVERYTHING!!!!1.

Also nominated: The Maltese Falcon, Hold Back The Dawn, Sergeant York

1942: Mrs. Miniver - As expected, WWII propaganda became the Oscarbait of the time period, and Mrs. Miniver was the most good out of all of the ones released that year.

Also nominated: The Magnificent Ambersons, Pride of the Yankees, Yankee Doodle Dandy

1943: Casablanca - The best movie ever made. No contest. If you disagree you're a retard.

Also nominated: 9 films worse than Casablanca

1944: Going My Way - A film about a Priest running a Boy's Choir (See: Spotlight). Made to sell Bing Crosby records to your grandmother.

Also nominated: Double Indemnity, Wilson, Gaslight, Since You Went Away

1945: The Lost Weekend - A film about a depraved alcoholic, and the first of MANY Billy Wilder flicks to win awards. Was laughed at during preview screenings, but once they added an original musical score, it's suddenly amazing.

Also nominated: Mildred Pierce, Anchors Aweigh

1946: The Best Years of Our Lives - After "winning" World War II, Americans needed a story about 3 disfigured soldiers coming back home from the war to feel better.

Also nomianted: It's a Wonderful Life, Lawrence Olivier's Henry V.

1947: Gentlemen's Agreement - Movie about a goy journalist pretending to be a Jew and confronts anti-semites (luckily he only meets the dumb ones, and not the ones that are smart enough to redpill him). Nothing too special about it apart from that apart from making Elia Kazan famous.

Also nominated: David Lean's adaptation of a Dickens novel, yet another Jew movie Crossfire, and 2 Christmas classics.

1948: Hamlet - Lawrence Olivier rips off a Shakespeare story and wins Best Picture. What a hack.

Also nominated: The Red Shoes, The Treasure of Sierra Madre.

1949: All the King's Men - Not All The President's Men. A tale about how politicians ALWAYS become corrupt, no exceptions.

Also nominated: 2 war movies and 2 chick flicks.

1950s[edit]

1950: All About Eve - A movie about an autistic fangirl who desperately wants to be like her favorite actress. Like Sunset Boulevard, it appeals to Hollywood actors, only this flick is much nicer than that film so it ends up being the winner.

Also nomianted: Born Yesterday, King Solomon's Mines, Father of the Bride

1951: An American in Paris - Gene Kelly dances the night away in this American/French classic. It is so mezmerizing that it's prompted millions around the world to make countless internet posts saying "Man, movies was so much better back then..."

Also nominated: A Streetcar Named Desire, Quo Vadis

The 1950s were dominated with films about the word of God.

1952: The Greatest Show on Earth - Just 3 hours of circus with a plot slapped in between. The only reason this won Best Picture is because Academy voters were united in voting out High Noon for winning Best Picture due to it's allegorical nature regarding the Hollywood blacklist, and Cecil B. DeMille was among the biggest allies of the House of Un-American Activities Committee. While the attempt to curb the commies is admirable, it also meant that this ended up winning Best Picture for that Year.

Also nominated: The Quiet Man, Moulin Rouge (non musical version), Ivanhoe.

1953: From Here to Eternity - A film about the events before Pearl Harbor (STILL inferior to Michael Bay). Influenced the scene in Shrek 2 where he kisses a Mermaid at the beach. Frank Sinatra actually wins an Oscar for this movie.

Also nominated: Three movies involving Rome in some way (Roman Holiday, The Robe, Julius Caesar), and that Western movie from Logan.

1954: On the Waterfront - A classic movie that symbolizes director Elia Kazan's fight against the communist invasion of Hollywood. The Academy awarding this film Best Picture was a crushing blow to the commie scum, and the master trolls caused EVEN MORE rage by giving Kazan an Honorary Oscar in 1999. The salt from said event persists to this day.

Also nominated: The Caine Mutiny, Seven Brides for Seven Brothers

1955: Marty - A losercore movie starring the guy who played Mermaid Man in Spongebob.

Also nominated: Mister Roberts

1956: Around the World in 80 Days - Really long wacky comedy flick that has a ton of big name stars from the 50s, but it doesn't have Jackie Chan so who cares.

Also nominated: The Ten Commandments, The King and I, Giant, Friendly Persuasion

1957: The Bridge on River Kwai - British Colonel played by Obi-Wan Kenobi gets suckered into building a bridge for the Japanese. Directed by one of the top autistic filmmakers of all time David Lean.

Also nominated: 12 Angry Men, Witness for the Prosecution

1958: Gigi - Poor man's My Fair Lady, but it's an extravagent musical that ALSO has a song about loving little girls so it breaks the record for most Oscars for any film (only to be beaten by Ben-Hur the very next year) Also nominated: The Defiant Ones, Separate Tables (where David Niven wins Best Actor while also being am Oscars co-host that year)

1959: Ben-Hur - An epic Epic film. From a time where Christian movies weren't complete cancer.

Also nominated: Anatomy of a Murder, The Diary of Anne Frank

1960s[edit]

1960: The Apartment - Wageslave tries to get a rise in his company by letting his co-workers use his apartment for various activities.

Also nominated: The Alamo, The Sundowners

1961: West Side Story - Romeo and Juliet, but this time involving dirty Puerto Rican and Polack gangs from New York fighting it out while dancing pretty gayly.

Also nominated: The Hustler, Judgement at Nurembourg

1962: Lawrence of Arabia - David Lean strikes again. White British soldier T.E. Lawrence proves to be the only person in the Middle East capable of controlling the savage mudslimes in the Turkish/Arabian conflict. Also no annoying women to be found.

Also nominated: The Longest Day, To Kill a Mockingbird.

1963: Tom Jones - The weirdest fucking Best Picture winner ever made. This British period piece comedy stars Albert Finney as a bastard child who screws a bunch of women and gets involved with a class conflict. It's got BOTH a Romeo & Juliet type story AND British people, how could the Academy resist?

Also nominated: America America, Lilies of the Field, and Cleopatra (rule of thumb, never make a Cleopatra movie, you'll fucking lose)

1964: My Fair Lady - Rich man's Gigi. George Cukor directs this adaptation of the Broadway classic with Audrey Hepburn lip-syncing the night away.

Also nominated: Dr. Strangelove, Mary Poppins, Zorba the Greek, Beckett

The 1960s: A transformative decade.

1965: The Sound of Music - Starts out as the happiest movie ever, then the Nazis come in to RUIN FUCKING EVERYTHING.

Also nominated: Doctor Zhivago, A Thousand Clowns, Darling, Ship of Fools

1966: A Man of All Seasons - Again, British costume dramas were the Oscarbait of the 1960s, and this one revolves around King Henry VIII refusing this British dude Thomas More from divorcing his wife, to the point where he ends up permab&ing him from real life.

Also nominated: Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?, The Russians are Coming The Russians are Coming.

1967: In the Heat of the Night - Winner of Best Picture in the most progressive year for movies evar, this movie involves a black detective played by Sidney Poitier, who solves a murder crime while also dealing with a buncha racist ASSHOLES along the way.

Also nominated: The Graduate (We hate our parents too!), Guess Who's Coming to Dinner (Interracial propaganda), Bonnie and Clyde (woah, they just killed some people!), and Doctor Dolittle (yes, that happened).

1968: Oliver! - Les Miserables for little kids. Another source of butthurt since this won Best Picture while 2001: A Space Odyssey wasn't even nominated.

Also nominated: Lion in the Winter, Romeo & Juliet (AGAIN)

1969: Midnight Cowboy - Two probably gay men, a cowboy and a sick Jew, struggle to survive in New York City. After all the wishy-washy happy films from before, here we get a much more depressing film for the cynical hippies of the late 60s.

Also nominated: Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, Hello Dolly!, and Z.

1970s[edit]

1970: Patton - The last-ditch effort to encourage Americans during the Vietnam war, only for them lose anyways. Nevertheless, it won 7 Oscars, however George C. Scott refused his acting Oscar because he disapproved of the Academy's bullshit.

Also nominated: M*A*S*H, Five Easy Pieces, Airport, Love Story.

1971: The French Connection - Cool action movie about a badass cop who busts junkies for a living and discovers a possible French Connection for a major narcotics network.

Also nominated: A Clockwork Orange, The Last Picture Show, Fiddler on the Roof.

JEWS.jpg

1972: The Godfather - THE GREATEST MOVIE EVAR MADE!!!!111 Like George C. Scott did, Marlon Brando refused his acting Oscar in protest of his concerns of the Jewish control over Hollywood mistreatment of Native Americans in Hollywood.

Also nominated: Cabaret, The Emigrants, Deliverance, Sounder.

1973: The Sting - Nostalgia pandering before it was cool. This flick has a cartoonish 1930s look throughout the whole thing, and it has Robert Redford and Paul Newman in it. Cue the awards.

Also nominated: A horror film, a George Lucas teen hangout film, an artsy foreign film, and a romcom.

1974: The Godfather Part II - ALSO THE GREATEST MOVIE EVAR MADE!!!!111 Only this time, it involves a brown skinned immigrant coming to America and, as usual, further sparking up the crime rates in the city of New York.

Also nominated: Lenny, The Conversation, Chinatown, The Towering Inferno

1975: One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest - In an Oregon mental help facility, a perverted criminal is the only man to stop Nurse Ratched from abusing her powers further. The film is about the director Milo Forman's experiences in Czechoslovakia's communist dictatorship and on that regard it totally deserves it's Best Picture win.

Also nominated: Barry Lyndon, Dog Day Afternoon, Jaws, Nashville.

1976: Rocky - Sylvester Stallone's only shot at winning any prestigious award, Rocky Balboa is an underdog who just happens to have a name cool enough for him to take on the Heavyweight Champion Apollo Creed. Spoiler alert, Stallone lets the black guy win (at least with this entry). This film helped lift the spirits of the American masses right after getting buttfucked by the Viet Cong.

Also nominated: Taxi Driver, Network, Bound for Glory, All the President's Men.

1977: Annie Hall - Woody Allen does Woody Allen things and tells Woody Allen jokes and dates Woody Allen type girls for 90 minutes.

Also nominated: Star Wars, The Goodbye Girl, The Turning Point, Julia.

1978: The Deer Hunter - Robert De Niro and Christopher Walken are forced into Russian Roulette games by the Viet Cong. They return home, and Walken's brain is devastated, so like anyone would normally do, he starts playing the game AGAIN. Inadvertently caused an array of idiots trying the game out for them selves but with AUTOMATIC firearms instead of revolvers. Started the trend of releasing Oscarbait in December so people will actually pay to see their miserable flicks because of their nominations. The director Michael Cimino was so acclaimed for his work here, he went on to RUIN CINEMA FOREVER with the overbudget bomb Heaven's Gate.

Meryl streep the devil.jpg

Also nominated: Midnight Express, Coming Home

1979: Kramer v. Kramer - So-so family drama, won over Apocalypse Now because they needed to push away New Hollywood for safe Hollywood flicks. Also stars the queen of Hollywood reptiles herself Meryl Streep.

Also nominated: All That Jazz, Breaking Away, Norma Rae.

1980s[edit]

1980: Ordinary People - So-so family drama, won over Raging Bull because they needed to push away New Hollywood for safe Hollywood flicks. Also directed by the king of Hollywood reptiles himself Robert Redford.

Also nominated: The Elephant Man, Coal Miner's Daughter, Tess (yes, they nominated Roman Polanski just years after he drugged and raped a child.)

1981: Chariots of Fire - A pretty boring British propaganda period piece about running in circles. Responsible for unleashing that goddamn overused piano song onto the world.

Also nominated: Raiders of the Lost Ark, Reds, Atlantic City, On Golden Pond.

1982: Gandhi - Another hagiographic biopic of Gandhi directed by the old guy from Jurassic Park. Doesn't address the fact that he totally fucked several women including his niece despite claiming celibacy, or his negative feelings towards the black race. This movie details the life of a man who has brought great progress, but nowadays this movie is considered racist for having Ben Kingsley portray an Indian. Nice progress! Overall, not nearly as good as the sequel.

Also nominated: E.T., The Verdict, Missing, Tootsie.

Artists' rendition of Amadeus (1984)

1983: Terms of Endearment - Another Hallmark-tier dramatic flick. If there's any piece of evidence to discredit auteur theory, it's the fact that James L. Brooks is the only person in history to win Best Picture, Best Director and Best Writing all by himself for this, yet it looks exactly the same as every other film ever made.

Also nominated: The Right Stuff, The Big Chill, The Dresser, Tender Mercies.

1984: Amadeus - A classic. Deranged composer Salieri who hopes to compose music for God seethes over how much better Mozart is than he is, and makes an attempt to leech off his efforts. Spiritual predecessor to Spongebob Squarepants.

Also nominated: A Passage to India, A Soldier's Story, Places in the Heart, The Killing Fields.

1985: Out of Africa - Really long and boring. This is a white people movie that just happens to take place in Africa, which makes it more bearable. Also, it stars the King and Queen of Hollywood reptiles themselves Robert Redford and Meryl Streep.

Also nominated: The Color Purple (11 nominations and 0 wins, LOL), Prizzi's Honor, Kiss of the Spider Woman, Witness.

1986: Platoon - Vietnam War Veteran and Liberal hippie Oliver Stone tells his raw and gritty account of what the war was like, and the degenerates that fought beside him. Does not feature R. Lee Ermey in any role.

Also nominated: Hannah and Her Sisters, Children of a Lesser God, The Mission, A Room with a View.

1987: The Last Emperor - An incompetent twerp gets born into the role of the Chinese emperor and sucked so bad at leading his country that Mao Zedong looked good in comparison.

Also nominated: Fatal Attraction, Moonstruck, Hope and Glory, Broadcast News

1988: Rain Man - Autism classic. Tom Cruise travels America with his brother played by Dustin Hoffman (talk about cast reversal), is first irritated by his dumb sperg habits, then he eventually realizes "WOW HE'S SOO SMART!" and begins to bond with him.

Also nominated: Mississippi Burning, Accidental Tourist, Working Girl, Dangerous Liasons.

1989: Driving Miss Daisy - Beating the dead horse of racism some more. Morgan Freeman plays Morgan Freeman, only this time he's driving some annoying Jew to places.

Also nominated: Dead Poets Society, Field of Dreams, My Left Foot, Born on the Fourth of July.

1990s[edit]

1990: Dances With Wolves - Kevin Costner rips off James Cameron's Avatar. What a hack. Like with Lawrence of Arabia, the white man proves to be the only one capable of achieving order with the primitive and stupid Natives.

Also nominated: Goodfellas, The Godfather Part III, Ghost (directed by one of the Zucker brothers), Awakenings.

1991: The Silence of the Lambs - It's a horror film but it's not trash. It has a strong female lead but it's not cancer. It has an over the top antagonist but he's not hammy. It has a tranny villain but the film is not degenerate. This film winning Best Picture with so much fresh bait to pick from is an actual miracle.

Also nominated: Beauty and the Beast, JFK, Bugsy, The Prince of Tides.

1992: Unforgiven - Clint Eastwood tries to give himself dignity with this gritty Western that seeks to destroy his legacy of making trashy B-movies with Sergio Leone, only to ruin it anyways by making a ton of boring Old People Movies in the future.

Also nominated: A Few Good Men, Howards End, Scent of a Woman, The Crying Game

1993: Schindler's List - The big boy that started it all. One of the most essential, powerfully moving & profoundly affecting films to ever grace the silver screen. The feature film that reveals the horrors and atrocities of Nazi Germany and pays memoir to a man who did a tremendous amount of good to the Jewish people. Steven Spielberg's remarkable achievement stresses the importance of saving human life, and it shall be remembered as a masterpiece for years to come.

The former king of Hollywood

Also nominated: In the Name of the Father, The Piano, The Fugitive, The Remains of the Day WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE??? YOU ARE VOTING FOR THE WRONG FILMS, STUPID GOYIM!!!

1994: Forrest Gump - Cavalcade for dummies. Telling everyone that this film deserved Best Picture over Pulp Fiction and Shawshank Redemption is guaranteed to stir butthurt on IMDb, Reddit, Letterboxd, etc.

Also nominated: Quiz Show, Four Weddings and a Funeral.

1995: Braveheart - Mel Gibson is a brave heart. He fights for his country's freedom by charging against the English, and by naming the Jews who are destroying freedom as we speak. How the Academy haven't revoked this film's Oscars is a mystery.

Also nominated: Il Postino, Apollo 13, Sense and Sensibility, Babe (YES, the talking pig movie)

1996: The English Patient - The centerpiece of all "Oscar" films. A classy WWII epic that not many people can recall to this day. Telling Elaine Bene that this film deserved Best Picture is guaranteed to stir butthurt where ever you meet her.

Also nominated: Fargo, Jerry Maguire, Secrets & Lies, Shine

1997: Titanic - The #2 movie of all time that changed cinema forever. There is not a single female on the planet Earth that doesn't have this as their favorite movie (if they don't they're lying.)

Also nominated: - Good Will Hunting, As Good as It Gets, L.A. Confidential, The Full Monty

1998: Shakespeare in Love - A film that makes Shakespeare fun for the normies. Won Harvey Weinstein his first, and last, Oscar statue.

Also nominated: Saving Private Ryan, Life Is Beautiful, The Thin Red Line, Elizabeth.

1999: Amadeus Beauty - What if there was a Hollywood movie where Kevin Spacey plays a pedophile? Wouldn't that be fucking BONKERS? In addition to that, this movie features a spergy filmmaker teen that rivals the aforementioned Rain Man on the autism scale.

Also nominated: The Sixth Sense, The Green Mile, The Insider, The Cider House Rules.

2000s[edit]

2000: Gladiator - Roman spectator battles, I like that shit.

Also nominated: Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, Traffic, Erin Brockovich, Chocolat

2001: A Beautiful Mind - "After John Nash, a brilliant but asocial mathematician, accepts secret work in cryptography, his life takes a turn for the nightmarish." Another win driven by the Academy's circlejerk nature due to director Ron Howard being an actor once, beating the likes of David Lynch, Peter Jackson, Robert Altman and Ridley Scott.

Also nominated: The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, Moulin Rouge!, Gosford Park, In the Bedroom.

2002: Chicago - An extravagent musical extravaganza. Contrary to the title, this film does not take place in Chicago, as there are no illiterate monkeys raping and shooting each other in the hood.

Also nominated: Gangs of New York, The Hours, The Pianist, The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers.

2003: The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King - That's right. Where's your Best Picture Oscar, Star Wars fags??? Everyone knows LOTR is for adults while Star Wars is for growth stunted manchildren, so just sit back and ACCEPT IT.

Also nominated: Lost in Translation, Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World, Seabiscuit, Mystic River

2004: Million Dollar Baby - Clint Eastwood comes back to put feminists in their place with a story about a female boxer who desperately wants to be a great boxer, but ends up getting demolished in the process.

Also nominated: The Aviator, Ray, Sideways, Finding Neverland

The butthurt locker.jpg

2005: Crash - In the hectic political climate we live in, there is only ONE thing that both the left and the right can agree on: that Crash is a terrible movie. A preachy and contrived mess with shitty characters and addressing of issues so humdrum and obvious that it's actually no surprise whatsoever that this ended up winning.

Also nominated: Brokeback Mountain, Munich, Capote, Good Night, and Good Luck

2006: The Departed - Martin Scorsese finally wins his Oscar. This time he directs, you guessed it, ANOTHER CRIME DRAMA! Only this time it's ripped off from some Hong Kong flick from a few years prior and gookspeak is replaced with Bostonspeak.

Also nominated: Little Miss Sunshine, Babel, Letters from Iwo Jima, The Queen

2007: No Country for Old Men - The Coen Bros bring back the Western with this flick about a chase for gold, only this time he includes an autistic spic that goes around killing people to spice things up (Spice, GET IT???).

Also nominated: There Will Be Blood, Atonement, Michael Clayton, Juno

2008: Slumdog Millionaire - A teenager from Pajeetland proves that his country is so stupid, they can only win intellect based Game Shows through sheer luck. After all the trouble, the lead still doesn't solve the struggle of learning how to use a toilet.

Also nominated: The Reader, Milk, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, Frost/Nixon.

2009: The Hurt Locker - ZOMG THE FIRST BEST DIRECTOR OSCAR FOR A WOMAN!!! Though that probably had to do with the dismal lineup they had that year. A thrilling thriller extravaganza about a bomb squad in the Iraq War.

Also nominated: Avatar, A Serious Man, District 9, Inglourious Basterds, The Blind Side, Precious, Up, Up in the Air, An Education.

2010s[edit]

2010: The King's Speech - Poor man's My Fair Lady but still rich man's Gigi. This is your usual Weinstein WWII British Oscarbait featuring a stuttering autist as the lead, only it's looks like it's directed by some dude who has probably never used a camera before in his life.

Also nominated: The Social Network, 127 Hours, Toy Story 3, Inception, The Fighter, Black Swan, True Grit, The Kids Are All Right, Winter's Bone.

2011: The Artist: A silent movie for people that are too pussy to handle REAL silents (like Birth of a Nation). Being made by French people, something as goofy as this flick is the only way foreign pictures can get respect from the normie sphere.

Also nominated: Hugo, War Horse, Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close, Midnight in Paris, The Help, The Tree of Life.

2012: Argo - If you want a political movie about Hollywood, watch Wag the Dog instead. Really average Hollywood/Muslim espionage flick that only got celebration from the Academy because Ben Affleck directed it. Thankfully, he was prevented from getting a "Best Director" nomination for this, but he ended up getting awards from everywhere else, including BAFTA'S David Lean Award for Direction (Praising David Lean and Ben Affleck in the same breath should be punishable by execution. Then again, this is assuming the Hollywood sphere ever had standards in what they praise.)

Also nominated: Lincoln, Life of Pi, Amour, Django Unchained, Beasts of the Southern Wild, Les Miserables, Zero Dark Thirty, Silver Linings Playbook.

2013: 12 Years a Slave - You get the idea. Apparently this film winning wasn't satisfactory enough for the darkies to not call the Academy racist, so it may as well have lost. With that said, it's a pretty well done flick, and one of the best Slave Torture Porn films to ever be made.

Moonlight's predecessor

Also nominated: The Wolf of Wall Street, Her, Nebraska, Philomena, Gravity, American Hustle, Dallas Buyer's Club, Captain Phillips.

2014: Birdman - A movie that offers a biting reflection on actors and critics' ego, that still managed to win awards and acclaim from said people. The film's striking irony comes from the fact that in the film, Michael Keaton is a washed-up actor that refuses to star in capeshit, and is tempted to give in for the purpose of money. Years later, after being Oscar nominated for his performance here, Michael Keaton ends up starring in Spiderman: Homecoming (fun fact: Keaton's daughter is played by Gwen Stacy, Spiderman's dead girlfriend. The Incredible Hulk is ALSO in Birdman.)

Also nominated: Whiplash, The Grand Budapest Hotel, The Imitation Game, The Theory of Everything, Boyhood, American Sniper, Selma (pity nomination, evident by it only being nominated for Best Picture and Best Original Song).

2015: Spotlight - A film that dramatizes The Boston Globe exposing the Catholic Church's rampant kiddy diddling. While it's cool and all that these degenerates got caught, this film doesn't tell us anything we don't already know, and it's Best Picture win was just a political move to try and push Hollywood's anti-Christian agenda.

Also nominated: The Revenant (action flick), Mad Max: Fury Road (action flick), Bridge of Spies (token Spielberg flick), The Martian (quippy sci-fi flick), The Big Short (comedy flick), Brooklyn (girly romantic movie), and Room (not THE Room.). Great picks, Academy! They were REALLY worth the nigger tears.

2016: Moonlight A.K.A. Gay Niggers from Outer Space II: Electric Boogaloo - 2 hour guilt trip for white liberals to forcibly feel empathy for a gay black teenager in the Miami ghetto. Jenkins rips off from Wong Kar-Wai, Francois Truffaut, and many other filmmakers better than him, but to Tumblrinas who have no knowledge of film he is considered a visionary and gets respect for making such a "bold" and "daring" film, even though we've seen it all a thousand times already.

Also nominated: La La Land (the real winner before they decided to shut it down the last minute), Arrival, Manchester By The Sea, Lion, Hidden Figures, Fences, Hacksaw Ridge (Mel Gibson's redemption).

Nominees of the Now[edit]

2017:[edit]

WINRAR: The Shape of Water - Del Toro became the 4th Mexican in the 2010s to win the Best Director Oscar (2nd for Best Picture) and libtards will continue to complain about diversity. A fish-fucking fantasy tale that appeals to fans of interracial and homos wanting to justify their degeneracy by calling it "Love". Featuring Michael Shannon as the cartoony racist bad guy wanting to catch Sally Hawkin's fish lover, Octavia Spencer in her role as Octavia Spencer, and Richard Jenkins as her repressed homosexual roommate.

Darkest Hour - Another year, another semi above average WWII biopic getting a Best Picture nomination. Gary Oldman will finally win his Oscar for plastering 1000 pounds of fat makeup on his face and shouting some motivational Winston Churchill quotes for 2 hours.

Dunkirk - Yet ANOTHER WWII movie about Dunkirk, and the closest that Christopher Nolan will EVER come to winning any award. Dunkirk is one of his best flicks by far as it's devoid of most of his bullshit tropes, but it will lose all of it's awards because there's no political agenda attached to it for Hollywood to gawk over. Is one of the most British films of the year but wasn't nominated for the BAFTA's "Best British Film' award because there wasn't enough diversity.

Phantom Thread - Paul Thomas Anderson gets nominated yet again, only to inevitably lose. Was a surprise nomination and only made the cut because Daniel Day Lewis and by being a costume drama.

Three Billboards Outside Ferguson Ebbing, Missouri - The Brit that wrote In Bruges assumes he can write a story about American culture and the police force and not look foolish in the process to those with any sense of discernment. Easy pick for Best Picture with it's ensemble of famous Hollywood actors, it's anti-cop sentiment, and it's story revolving around a rape victim which allows interminable back-patting from the Academy due to the current #MeToo "movement".

Get Out - Jordan Peele rips off The Stepford Wives, but replaces it with black people. Completely average but managed to get a near perfect rating on Rotten Tomatoes and receive 4 major Oscar nominations because quota pandering. This is actually about the menace of white liberals sucking up to black people to the point where they want to become one with their race, but naturally the left and the alt-right totally miss the point entirely and think it's a black fantasy.

The Post - A true story about the first female publisher of the Washington Post who helps reveal Nixon's involvement with the Watergate Scandal, resulting in Nixon trying to suppress their efforts to prevent the word coming out. Produced by Amy Pascal, Directed by Steven Spielberg, starring Meryl Streep and Tom Hanks, written by Josh Singer of Spotlight. Gee, I wonder what political ideology spunk this is trying to shove down my throat.

Call Me By Your Name - 30 year old Armie Hammer has a gay romance with a teenager. A 100% normal romance because LOVE WINS.

Lady Bird - Average quirky coming of age indie flick. Greta Gerwig received a token nomination for Best Director after Natalie Portman pulled a shitty stunt at the Golden Globes jokingly referring to the Best Director nominees as "the all-male nominees". Sadly, praising such mediocrity only goes to show how shitty female directors are.

Wonder Woman - LOLJK, this piece of shit got absolutely nothing, resulting in catastrophic female rage across the globe.

2018:[edit]

WINRAR: Green Book - RACISM. IS. BAD. AND. EVIL. ROODY. POOS. Got a slew of lefties mad because it showed a white man and a black man actually being cooperative despite their differences, whining that it wasn't their precious superhero movie for babies that won instead.

A Star is Born - Literally the FIFTH version of a movie from 1932, only this one has famed transgender Lady Gaga in it to please the normies that can't watch black & white movies without bleaching their eyes out.

BlacKkKlansman - Remember that thing that happened last thursday? When some dumbass trannies jumped in front of a moving car and one fatass got a heart attack, and lefties instantly started branding it as a terrorist attack that proves White Supremacists are "sweeping the nation" all while dickriding Muslims? And how later the President was too retarded to realize that branding a herd of basement dwellers shouting Nazi slogans as "good people" wasn't a very good idea??? Well, Spike Lee made a propaganda piece for that, and it's blowing up this year in Awards Season, because an Honorary Oscar for Spike Lee wasn't enough.

Black Panther - Generic Marvel movie #842 good because black people in it. GIB AWARDS.

Bohemian Rhapsody - That one movie that was supposed to star Sacha Baron Cohen, but couldn't because the studio just wanted a shitty PG-13 crowdpleaser. Has a shitty rating on Rotten Tomatoes and was directed by a rapist yet is somehow a huge contender for Best Picture just because it made a ton of money and it's about a recognizable queer from the boomer era, even winning Best Actor and Best Drama at the Golden Globes.

Roma - A Mexican maid deals with annoying kids and cleans up dogshit with the Mexican Chimpout of 1970 in the background.

The Favourite - A movie with awful lighting & fish-eye lens that's considered "visually stunning" by film nerds. Two attractive actresses dyke it out, NOT with each other though, but with some fat old lady.

Vice - Dick Cheney gets shit on. No Trump parallels here whatsoever (in other news, anyone who complains about anti-Trump propaganda being in every Hollywood movie ever is a triggered Nazi).

#OscarsSoWhite[edit]

   
 
"Playing the “diversity” card while playing the Oscars is the media’s way of stoking racial anxiety. This folly has nothing to do with explaining how the Academy Awards or the film industry works. So soon after the Sony e-mail hacking exposed the racial insensitivity of film-industry executives, the media pretends to be “shocked” by the Oscar nominations."
 

 
 

Armond White

Social maverick.
Refer to these statistics every time some libshit complains about lack of diversity.

In 2016, Spike Lee won his own Honorary Oscar before the competitive nominees are announced. At first, he is thankful that they actually decided to recognize his joints as true art instead of disregarding them for being mostly crap. Then the actual Oscar nominees are announced, and no black actors ended up making the cut (second year in a row). All of a sudden, Spike Lee is enraged, and throws his previous positive sentiment out the window to start chimping out over the nominations like the ungrateful ape he is (though he's too pussy and greedy to pull a Scott/Brando and refuse his Oscar). He is joined by fellow negro Will Smith to preach about "DIVERSITY AND EQUAL OPPURTUNITIES!!!". In reality, Will is just butthurt over the fact that he wasn't nominated for his performance in Concussion, and wants to strike back at the Academy.

To anyone who's not inundated up to their ears in leftist retardation, this issue is incredibly trivial. The purpose of Awards are (presumably) to acknowledge the BEST of Hollywood's contributions every year. If your shitty movies don't get enough acclaim, or if your poorfag ghetto studios are unable to dump enough shekels into marketing to secure a nomination, that's not on the Academy, that's on YOU. This forced outrage also disregards the fact that blacks are STILL a minority in America, and that it's in mathematical reason to not produce as much as the other races, let alone anything Oscar worthy, and also, fucking The Weeknd got nominated for an Oscar. Alejandro G. Inarritu (director) and Emmanuel Lubezki (cinematographer) are both Mexicans and they managed to win EVERY SINGLE YEAR since 2014. Racism my ass, but the normies that pretend to be mad at this garbage doesn't care about anyone who isn't an overpaid elitist figurehead actor, so that gets ignored.

The #OscarsSoWhite hashtag started to trend, it made innumerable headlines all over the place, a slew of white Hollywood actors and journalists started to feel guilty over the whole idiotic fiasco, including them making an unfunny SNL skit about it which some underpaid soylent media promoter calls "hilarious" in his article post. Also note that this was back in the day when Trump was still considered a joke and a non-threat, imagine if this lunacy happened today. Eventually Chris Rock, who was the host of the ceremony that year, decided to do a re-write of his show so he can bitch and moan for hours on end about how black people don't get enough recognition, and how we should just give black people free Oscars no matter how mediocre they are.

As expected, this narrative worked. Everyone now has their "eyes opened" about racial inequality in Hollywood, and the Academy ended up nominating more black films the succeeding year (though this was likely a result of the black race actually giving a shit and putting effort this time around.) But hey, at least racism is finally over, right? the media goes on to complain about the prospect of blacks not WINNING the awards next year. Yes, forget all that "JUST GIVE US OPPURTUNITIES" garbage, if you don't go their way, they'll start another fake outrage at your expense. Good job on going above and beyond, Hollywood!

Coonlight's Best Picture victory[edit]

All that money, and then this happens.
The hastily-deleted tweet from the envelope man.

After last year's shitshow, and following Donald Trump's Presidential victory, it was basically guaranteed that the next Best Picture winner would be a nigger flick. Enter Moonlight, the Oscarbait frontrunner of the year, which not only has ghetto blacks, but it also has GAY people as well! This proved quite the competition for it's main opponent La La Land, a much more FUN Oscarbait that reminded the old Jew voters about the good old days of Hollywood. Still, for the entire season, it seemed like La La Land was the clear winner. It tied a record of 14 Oscar nominations, only shared by previous Best Picture winners All About Eve and Titanic, it won the most Golden Globes in history, it won the DGA and PGA circlejerk awards, and it was the most popular choice nominated by far, barring, as expected, black poople and Twitter retards that believe La La Land is evil & racist by virtue of having a straight white male be more successful than John Legend in the movie.

The Academy Awards finally arrived. By the time Best Picture was to be announced, La La Land ended up giving SIX rich people their own shiny naked man statuettes, which is more than any other film that night (Moonlight won only two). After Emma Stone won her Best Actress award for La La Land (which they chose to announce AFTER Best Actor for some feminist shit, who knows), senile Classic Hollywood superstars Warren Beatty and Faye Dunaway came to announce Best Picture, and the winner is La La Land!

Libtards, niggers, and film snobs shit themselves for a solid minute. The Jew producers come up to take their awards, and were literally halfway through their acceptance speeches, until one of the balding nu-male pussies among them decided to announce the mistake first. After another minute of confusion, it's revealed that Moonlight was the REAL winner, and the guy holds up the big envelope to prove it. It turns out some idiot backstage was too busy jerking off to Emma Stone's ass after she won her award, and ended up grabbing a duplicate envelope for "Best Actress: Emma Stone - La La Land", then the Alzheimers-ridden cunt Faye Dunaway ended up reading the card not noticing anything wrong with it. (Alternative theory: the real winner was La La Land, but it was change at last minute to Moonlight so the goyim don't win).

This sparked a monumental shitstorm on the webs. Blacks and libcucks collectively started screeching and jumping in excitement after whiteys got embarrassed in front of millions of people, and to this day there's still butthurt fighting over the incident. Ironically enough, as everyone who's read the Winners category above has learned by now, Best Picture nominees are almost always better than the real winners anyways, so La La Land actually WINS in this scenario, and will continue being enjoyed by audiences for years to come, meanwhile Moonlight will be forgotten once everyone on the planet finally becomes effeminate and brown and has no need for flicks like that anymore to enforce their propaganda.

Moonlight's target audience.

See also[edit]

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