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Thomas Watt Hamilton

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Lose an iPod?

This page contains an hero.
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Thomas Watt Hamilton
Nationality: Britfag  MiniflagUK.png
Highscore Killed 17, injured 15
Top 25? 14th Place
1st: Sir Anders Behring Breivik
2nd: Woo Bum-kon
3rd: Omar Mateen
13th: Charles Whitman
15th: Michael Ryan
Style Single player
An Hero? Yes


Thomas "Watt" Hamilton was a 43-year-old pedofuck from Scotland who became Britain's luminary High Score winner following his lash-out at Dunblane Primary School on the morning of March 13, 1996, in which he ultimately pwned 17 dumb shits (16 children, 1 teacher) in just under 5 minutes time. Thomas' heroic acts propagated Martin Bryant to orchestrate the Port Arthur Massacre in Ausfailia 6 weeks later, and possibly the Sandy Hook shootings, based on the similarities between each event.

Early Life

Thomas Hamilton was born on 10th May, 1952. His parents divorced in 1955, leaving Thomas in his mother's custody. Nearing his 4th birthday, his name was legally changed to "Thomas Watt Hamilton". Little Tommy grew up in the belief that his mother was his older sister, and was said to be exceedingly close to her throughout his youth.

Sometime in his 20's he occupied a Woodcraft shop which specialized in the sale of DIY goods, though he became an oldfag and gave up the shop after 13 years of service in 1985.

Little is known about Mr. Hamilton's youth, suggesting that no-one, not even his relatives genuinely give a shit.

Scout Service/Boys Clubs (1973 - 1996)

<3

It was around the time Mr. Hamilton graduated from college when he started to leak his pedophilic tendencies into the children of the general public. He would satisfy himself through the foundation of various "Boys Clubs", which he would operate entirely on his own. A number of complaints were made about his leadership, and on at least two occasions he had forced boys to keep him company in his pedovan overnight, his excuse being "he wanted to keep the children warm from the cold weather outside". His official Scout's membership was revoked after parents raised concern over him photographing boys exercising in tight, undersized swimsuits without permission. Regardless, Hamilton would never admit defeat, and would strive towards bonding with the boys that he loved very dearly. Hamilton was known to have formed at least 15 Boys Clubs in his lifetime, with each Club lacking participants and falling to shit. His anger flourished whenever his sexual advancements were protested by lawful douchebags. Hamilton resorted to stock-piling on ammunition and shooting gunz at the range, he came to the realization that he was destined to win the Golden iPod.


   
 
Hamilton was a loner, he wouldn't engage in social conversation with anybody; it is known also that women members didn't particularly like being around him. He was a bit of a creep in their eyes
 

 
 

—Mr. G. S. Crawford, Secretary of the Stirling Rifle and Pistol Club.

Dungoof'd @ Dunblane

On the 13th of March, Wednesday morning, ol' Hammy got fed up with his failed attempts at trying to have fun with little boys and insisted that if he couldn't get the cock, he'd smash 'em like a rock. Thomas had his last cup of tea and crumpets before driving to the school in his Pedovan to wreck shit. Prior to entering the school building, Thomas severed the cables to the telegraph pole using a set of pliers in an attempt to prolong the arrival of law enforcement, however, this telegraph pole only served nearby houses rather than the school. Thomas marched into the school gymnasium, where 28 1st-Graders were doing physical education with 3 staff members. Just before some bitch named Eileen Harrild attempted to confront him, Thomas went full Touhou on everybody, roasting 17 ppl and stinging another 15. The kiddy-killer also tried to score bonus points firing shots into a mobile classroom teaching a bunch of 7th-Graders, but failed miserably, only hitting items and other equipment. Thomas then re-entered the gym, feasting his eyes upon the bloodbath he had created. He desperately wanted to caress the small corpses strewn across the floor, but the cops were about to kick his ass, so he pulled a Budd Dwyer and successfully became An Hero, not to mention that he won the Golden iPod! (UK edition).

Dunblane vs. Sandy Hook

   
 
Media in the United Kingdom compared the shooting to the Dunblane school massacre.
 

 
 

—USAToday.com [1]

  • Both perpetrators arrived on school grounds at approximately 9:30 AM.
  • Both killing sprees lasted less than 5 minutes.
  • Most of the people slayed were 1st-Graders.
  • Deadliest primary/elementary school massacres in British/American history.
  • Both perpetrators shared an interest in pedophilia.

Videos


Garry's Mod

MAH NIGGA U GOT ROASTED

Eileen Harrild describes the horrible delightful events.

Graded Score

Graded score
Kill count: 17/20
Accuracy: 11/20 18 killed, 15 injured.
Style: 15/20 Sk00l Sh00ting
Butthurt: 20/20 UK's version of Columbine!
Bonus: 20/20 Exceptionally fast-paced! Gets the job done quick.
Total score: 88/100 (A)
Most outstanding kiddy-killer in British history.
See full ranking


Wanted Level:
___________________

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___________________

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Vice Squad


See Also

HighScoreLeft.png
Thomas Watt Hamilton is part of a series on High Scores
[Game OverInsert Coin]
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Single Player

Aaron AlexisAdam LanzaAli David SonbolyAnders Behring BreivikAriana Grande MassacreAurora Theatre ShootingBaruch GoldsteinBreda Highschool MassacreBreitscheidplatzBruce Jeffrey PardoCampo Elías DelgadoCharles BishopCharles Whitman's TumorChris Harper-MercerCho Seung-HuiDeath to Traitors, Freedom for BritainDmitry VinogradovDylann Storm RoofElliot RodgerFort HoodGeorge SodiniJack Gilbert GrahamJared Lee LoughnerJason DaltonJaylen FrybergJeff WeiseJeffrey DahmerJesse OsborneJiverly VoongJoe StackJohn Russel HouserJosef FritzlJason RodriguezKimveer GillKip KinkelLuby's massacreMarc LepineMark BartonMark EssexMartin BryantMatthew de GroodMichael CarnealMichael RyanMr. SaariMutsuo ToiNghtmrchld26Nice Truck Attack 2016Omar MateenOsama bin LadenPekka-Eric AuvinenPennsylvania School StabbingRaoul MoatReina Nightclub MassacreRobert BalesRobert HawkinsRobert SteinhäuserSam HydeTed BundyThomas Watt HamiltonTJ LaneTim KretschmerUnabomberVirginia Tech MassacreWade Michael PageZac Penton

Co-Op Mode

Boston Marathon BombingColumbineDallas Sniper AttacksJews did WTCPearl HarborSan Bernardino shootingSandniggers in ParisTimothy McVeigh

Civilization

Adolf HitlerAugusto PinochetHolocaustJoseph StalinKim Il-sungMao ZedongPol PotSaddam HusseinWorld War II

 
Thomas Watt Hamilton is part of a series on
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V& Pedophiles [-+]
UnV& Pedophiles [-+]
Thomas Watt Hamilton is part of a series on Columbine
[All jocks stand up!NBK]
Columbineflower.png Columbine:

ColumbineEric Harris and Dylan KleboldSuper Columbine Massacre RPGDo you believe in godColumbine CopycatsColumbine GalleryColumbiners

Admirers

TheAmazingAtheistBrooke Higgins and Sienna JohnsonCho Seung-HuiIchverbotAlex HribalJaylen FrybergKimveer GillRyan SchallenbergerRobert Butler Jr.Pekka-Eric AuvinenAdam LanzaJeff WeiseDillon CosseyAsa CoonNghtmrchld26Lindsay Kantha SouvannarathSebastian BosseTim KretschmerLynn AnnYou

Locations:

ColoradoUnited StatesSchoolSuburbs

Related:

DoomPolice BrutalityPostalSchool ShootingMass ShootingVideo gamesTrenchcoatMarilyn MansonKMFDMRammsteinGothConcerned MotherNewgroundsRyan LambournSchool Shooter: North American Tour 2012The MatrixSouth ParkMichael MooreQuentin Tarantino1990sJack ThompsonGun control

[Stop shooting!Pull the trigger]
Thomas Watt Hamilton is part of a series on Gun Control
Locus in quo: Colorado Theatre ShootingSandy Hook Elementary MassacreUmpqua Community College ShootingSan Bernardino shootingPulse Nightclub Massacre
Supporters

Barack ObamaChristiansConcerned MothersDemocratsGovernmentThe KennedysFaggotsLiberalsMichael BloombergJewsSJWsSensitive peopleTrayvon Martin

Main ideas:

GunGun ControlMurderMass ShootingSchool Shooting

Haters gonna hate:

KillersRepublicans

Acts of revenge:

Boston Marathon Bombing

Objectors:

Charlton HestonJames HolmesNRARepublicansPeople planning a massacre

Pre-2012 Gun Massacres

ColumbineÉcole Polytechnique Dawson CollegeVirginia Tech MassacreAustin, TexasNIU Valentine's Day MassacreHungerford Massacre

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Thomas Watt Hamilton
is part of a series on
An Heroes

[iPodXbox]

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Failures

Crystal ShinkleDylann Storm RoofJeffree MoonLolo FerrariOperation YewtubeOwen WilsonPogoRooRex FowlerSirtom93The Great Sonic-cide of 2007Toaster SteveTumbles the Stairdragon

Died Alone

Aaron SwartzAcidChanAdam LanzaAdolf HitlerAlan TuringAmanda ToddAn HaloStephanie Michelle BrownAndrew KoenigAsa CoonBob8466Brandon CrispBrigit Lorena GonzalezBroady Paul LedetBruce "Satan Claus" PardoBudd DwyerCandyjunkieCharles BishopCharmaine DragunChris BenoitChris DornerChristine ChubbuckChristopher FosterCho Seung-HuiCodey PorterDavid RitchesonDennis AvnerDustin MichaelsDylan KleboldEmma JonesEric HarrisGeorge SodiniGizgizHannah BondHeath LedgerHunter S. ThompsonImma-The-DeerJake RobertsJames LeshkevichJarrad WillisJaylen FrybergJeff WeiseJenny GrantJiverly VoongJodie Gater and Stephanie GestierJoe StackJonathan Kendrick LewisJustin-anonKatelyn Nicole DavisKevin Neil WhitrickMarvin HeemeyerKimveer GillKlerckKurt CobainLeelah AlcornLivecorpseMatthias SchoormannMario FerreyraMegan MeierMercedes HerreraMichael RyanMitchell HendersonMr. HandsMatti SaariJosh BallardNghtmrchld26Otoya YamaguchiPaula GoodspeedPekka-Eric AuvinenPhilip MarkoffPhoebe ConnopQuentin HubbardRachele RuddRehtaeh ParsonsRicardo LopezRichard JeniRobert HawkinsRobert SteinhäuserRobin WilliamsRudolph ZurickSadie DavilaSam LeesonSebastian BosseShane HalliganShaun DykesShawn WoolleyShayStephen KazmierczakStephen HuffSteve StephensStiletto oneTang YongmingTatiana the TigerThe An Heroes of BridgendTim KretschmerTiziana CantoneTony48219TooDamnFilthyTyler ClementiTyler DumstorfTyler PetersonVester Lee "Bryce Williams" Flanagan IIXallyfacex

Related Pages

90 Day JaneAn hero dayask.fmAutoerotic asphyxiationColumbineGolden iPodHeaven's GateHigh ScoreHow to become an heroMydeathspacePseudocideShotgun mouthwashSuicideThreatening suicideVirginia Tech massacreWaco

Featured article January 17 & 18, 2016
Preceded by
Marc Lepine
Thomas Watt Hamilton Succeeded by
Sirtom93