Tom Delay

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Tom 'Man' Delay is the best majority leader the house has ever had. Tom Delay taught us that Nancy Pelosi is a big giant cunt and that conservative values such as gang raping the poor should be at the forefront of the American consciousness. Tom is a biologist so he knows that global warming is fucking bullshit. Recent rumors have spread that Tom Delay is gay. However, Tom Delay is not gay, and all of the people who say that are fucking homos. I mean, why would he be gay if he was so vehemently opposed to gay marriage.? Also, why would he have thrown up every time he had buttsecks with a guy? It's because he is 100% not gay.

Tom is the first person to say that abortion affects all of us in illegal immigration. He was the first person to devise the ultra-brilliant hypothesis that nobody would need illegal alien trash to do our jobs if we just don't abort any babies and let the unwanted babies do all the work. This proves that Pelosi is a cunt because she can't see this; but you know it's true. Tom also committed adultery (for the lulz) but it didn't matter because his adultery was different than Newt (the Puke) Gingrich's. Newt committed adultery while he was prosecuting Bill Clinton and his monstrous, unruly penis. Tom just did it at a different time. That's why Newt sux and Tom rules. Think about it, puke sux. We all know that, it sounds correct, right? And Tom rulz? Of course, isn't that a cool name? Tom?

DeLay was largely responsible for the current ongoing housing/mortgage crisis in America. He paved the way for junk lenders, crooks and schemers of the lowest sort to prey on people who didn't qualify for regular mortgages.

In Congress, he was known as "the Hammer," because of his ruthless, anti-social tendencies.


   
 
I think we got off the track when we allowed our government to become a secular government,” DeLay told host Matthew Hagee, the executive pastor of the Texas Cornerstone Church. “[W]e stopped realizing that God created this nation, that he wrote the Constitution, that it’s based on biblical principles.”
 

 
 

—Mr. Tom DeLay, February 2014

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DeLay has a blog. Nothing can stop him now.

Tom Delay
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