When You're Chill With Everyone

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Capybara - 11.jpg

The capybara, loosely translated to "crappy bear", secretes a fanciful and pleasing ass musk from its nethers, which apparently acts like heroin to other animals, making them seriously chill whenever they're around this walking butt drug.

The Internets, of course, instantly fell in love with this repugnant rear chilling rodent of unusual size and started making forced memes and other assorted bullshit artistry in its name. Such threads are of course filled with hilariously naive comments from furries and other related ilk pining on about how they want one of these foul smelling bastards as a pet, completely ignorant to the fact that it would be like living with a deranged hobo strung the fuck out on ecstasy who hasn't bathed since the Reagan administration.

 
 
The sound a capybara mother makes as her babies suckle is truly magical. She goes into a trance like state, her eyes glaze over and she starts to “sing”. She relaxes and seems to be very happy. Based on my observations it seems to me the sensation of the babies suckling at her teats maybe a very pleasurable one for a mother capybara.
 

 

—Oh your God what the fuck?!


The Science Of Stink Holes[edit]

You shut your God damn stink hole, you smelly butt trumpet!
Yes, that's a stick up it's ass.

Capybaras are territorial little rat bastards and their scent marking is some serious gawd damn business! Mostly the males engage in stink signage, but during mating the female will take a big smelly shit near the male to show she's interested in being boned. The males on the other hand prefer straddling a good sized shrub or twig and jamming their "anal pocket" onto it whilst simultaneously urinating on the plant... or maybe they just like pleasuring their anal cavity... I wouldn't put it past these sick little stoner looking snout heads.

Capybaras are also autocoprophagous, meaning they EAT THEIR OWN SHIT! Apparently they "need to do this" to obtain a source of bacterial gut flora, to help digest the cellulose in the grass and sticks and rocks and whatever they eat and as a means to extract the maximum protein and vitamins from their food. They may also regurgitate their food to masticate again, similar to cud-chewing by cattle. Yum!

Then again, that's just a load of science bushwa to try and explain why these sick little screwjobs are so damn nasty. It could simply be that they're nature's epic fuckup, retardation incarnate in animal form.

Gallery Of Chill[edit]

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