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World Wide Web Consortium
World Wide Web Consortium (W3C) was made at least 100 years ago when the big truck known as the Internets was invented by Al Gore. It was founded by three gay rich nerds who loved experimenting with Jenkem (Before everyone was doing it.) and loved playing Tetris way too much.
They wanted to make loads of bullshit rules and regulations so that new, upcoming web designers wouldn’t make websites that would make theirs look gay. Steadily over time, their power grew (as did their need for policing the internet, crack, and hookers), and so over time W3C became known as the ‘Website Fashion Police’ with their endless lists of regulations and requirements to make websites look like shit. Of course many designers over time gave them the metaphorical finger of win and ironically still made websites that sucked balls.FAIL
In order to try to attention whore harder, they created more rules and regulations and decided to update them every three years or whenever one of them gets laid, whichever first. They also are installing a W3 Alert button in all copies of Windows Vista what will make a loud screeching sound at computer max volume for six weeks to alert others to updates in the W3c regulations. They had to promise Bill Gates infinite porn and blowjobs in order to do this, but they claim is it worth it.
The World Wide Web Consortium regulations are often invoked by pretentious journalist wannabes who keep blogs. They do this in order to bash websites they've been banned from. It is unknown as to why these people feel that they need to cite bullshit rules created by a bunch of egotistical cunts who have no power to enforce them, but it is believed that they think this will make them look authoritative and knowledgeable about how the Internets work.
Stuff they Liek
- DDA (Disability Discrimination Act) That’s right, they try and help retarded people use the internets.
- Copyright (Unless they steal it from Brazilian designers.)
- Porn (Strictly BBW and Cheeseburgers)
- Your Mum
- Internet lawsuit
Stuff they Hate
- Eternal September
- Open Source
- Internet Art
- Everything else that's fun.
Fact of the day
Not many people know that the World Wide Web is named because of a spider, whilst the Internet is named because of a fish. In 1987 the Toho Film Company, creators of Godzilla, commissioned an out-of-work nerd called William Gibson to write a new monster movie. Gibson envisioned a virtual Tokyo in which the Giant Mutant Widow Spider battled for supremacy with Magikarp with the inevitable comic results. (Or I just made this all up because I
was bored thought I was on Uncyclopedia.) (For the crusade to keep ED free of stuff that is "not internet relevant" see Fundamentalists.)
|World Wide Web Consortium
is part of a series on serious business
Free Speech • Identity theft • Irony • Internet asshole • Internet Celebrities • Internet disease • Internet drama • Internet humanitarians • Internet Law • Internet lawsuit • Internet lawyer • Internet stalking • Internet tough guy • Internet Vigilante Group • Operation Falcon Punch • Swatting • Title IX • World Wide Web Consortium
People & Organizations
2cash • Alan Turing • Casey Serin • David Hockey • Dear Cis People • Doxbin • DREAMers • Fast Eddie • Grace Saunders • Hallcats Squadron • Jessi Slaughter • Kittens • Maja Schmidt • Meek Mill • Missy • Niggest Crook Force • Psychopath • Susan J. Elliott • Vloggerheads • WEB SHERIFF